how much eye contact do you make wen you talk to people?

how bout when theres a group of people?

if i had the choice

i would like to never look at ppl at all

on the other hand i do like to look at people sometimes

but then i feel like i'm staring...

but then default mode is to just not look at people

but then i realized what if people think you're being conceited or something

there are people that i like and i still don't make eye contact.

any experts of eye contact around here?

I don't have any problems with it. I usually look at their eyes, than away after 5-6 seconds. And repeat.

i used to have a huge problem with eye contact - i hated looking people in the eyes and i hated people looking me in the eyes. but then that was back when i was super shy and stuck to myself. i still don't keep eye contact that often, but i try to make an effort, particularly when i'm meeting someone for the first time/in interviews. just start off with a few seconds, then as you become more comfortable with the idea, hold contact for longer.

depends on how close the person is to me. i hate looking at people directly in the eye when they're REALLY close (like, in your personal space). i do have a tendency to maintain eye contact for a long time if the person is at a decent distance, but i guess i have a naturally mean expression, and people tend to think i'm challenging them or something!


stupid body language is so complicated.

I don't mind eye contact when talking but when I'm walking around, my eyes are always staring at the ground. This is why I can never recognize anyone I know when I'm walking -- I'm totally separated from the environment because I'm listening to my iPod and my eyes are staring at the ground -.-;;

Some of you people need to establish some self-esteem and learn to carry yourself with a sense of self-importance.

I tend to have problems with people, girls specifically, making eye contact with me. Especially when it's with their fist.

Oh gosh, I have a huge issue with making eye contact with people, especially people I don't know, I'm pretty awkward in real life.

With females, I usually keep constant eye contact. With males, I keep good eye contact, but also look away frequently.

ahh i feel the same way =_=
even if i know you i wont stare into your eyes..cuz then i feel like we're having a staring contest haha

but when i walk around, yea i sometimes make eye contact with strangers but i think nothing of it

i tend to look at peoples mouths when i talk to them....

^
You don't have to look directly into their eyes, just make sure it's in the general vicinity... like their nose or eyebrows. People think you're looking into their eyes when you're just looking 'around' their eyes. Still works.

But yes, eye-contact is important. Especially, if you want to make a good impression at work... or anywhere.

Try looking at the bridge of their nose. They'll think you're making eye contact. Works like a charm for me.

It's weird for me. I have problem making eye contact with some people especially those who are intimidating.

Hahaha I like to stare at people in the eyes, dunno why. So far no one has said it was creepy.

Same. I hate making eye contact with strangers when I'm walking...it feels like I'm staring at them or something. Usually when I walk I only look down or straight, so that's why I don't pay attention to people walking past me. My friends are usually the ones that see me first...

is there such thing as TOO much eye contact? i tend to keep eye contact with someone i am talking to... i need to learn to break away more often? i'm not sure if they feel uncomfortable with me looking at them for such a long time...

Same same, like the proverb.. The eyes are the windows of the soul
I tend to send many messages by them ^^;;

lol i can tell whenever someone is looking in my eyes or not. you can just see their focus.

i tend to look at the lips too haha.. =]

To the OP, your post does not rhyme? Is not poet y0?

I usually try to make eye contact when talking to someone, but it's hard. It feels awkward not to look them in the eye when you're talking to them (otherwise, what the hell ARE you looking at right? haha).. or else I won't even look at them when I'm talking to them. I think it just feels weird to have someone looking straight at you. @__@

i'm very shy and reserve person that making eye contact is such a difficult thing for me.
it makes me very conscious, specially when a guy looks at me.
now, since i personally deal with out client i managed to do it, since eye contact is important
in business dealings, if not you tend to be insincere.

I used to get nervous when I look at people in the eyes. I still do--with some people.

Eye contact is just a part of effective communication. If you don't look at people, they'll think you're not listening to them (like in a professional setting). But if you're with friends, it should be okay unless your friends think you're not listening.

But you're right. Can't stare at the person's eyes forever. So I try to focus on the person's forehead, tip of the nose or cheek so as not stare at their eyes. It works for a while and it's like you're talking to that facial part.

But I still hate it...

Im better at eye-contact now days, but I still think it's hard.
I don't have problems with eye-contact when the other person is talking thou.
But when it's my turn to talk, I feel awkward looking in their eyes to much but I do it as long as i can.

It's an interesting topic this.

Wounder why so many people have problems with this.

For me I think the reason is that I don't want to let people in to close to me in my life, and the eyes are the window to the soul.

I used to have a problem making eye contact with strangers. But these days, if I make eye contact with someone then I deliberately hold it even though it makes me a little edgy. It makes the other person even edgier though, for some reason. I think it's when they look at me and think they've caught me looking at them but instead of hurriedly glancing away as most people seem to do, I enact my right to look in any damn direction I please

i had a huge problem with that in high school. but during an internship interview, my future boss stopped the interview and told me to look at her in the eye. i was bewildered. but after that, i worked on it and now i look DEAD ON. : ) it works really well during meetings at work.. especially during presentations. people actually start to shy away from your gaze because they're expecting you to call them out. haha

i try to keep the eye contact if possible. if things get awkward, maybe the other person will look away first. :/ or if i can't stand it myself, i look away in a way that still shows that i'm listening. i find that it makes you feel stupid when you're talking and the person you're talking to doesn't seem like they're listening. i also find it rude that you're not listening when they're giving out their time to talk to you, especially if it's like concerning teachers or business partners or such. so if i'm not looking at them, i'm writing down important advice or something they say to me, or momentarily distracted by a noise or something. but i try to focus on what they're saying to show that i'm listening, and i just look at them, not particularly their eyes, but like their facial features or something just behind them, if i can't stare straight at them.

I "stare" at the person I'm talking to which makes the younger generation think I'm old or creepy and to the old; they think I'm intelligent, haha.

I honestly get some-what irritated if the person I'm talking to looks away from me- like I'm not worth their time, pfft.

If I don't know you I make eye contact, but it's just uncomfortable. My eyes start feeling dry because I realize I'm not blinking, but then I don't want to blink too much because that just looks funny. I end up looking at my nails or something so I can blink LOL

If I don't like you, you get the death stare while you're talking, as my friend at work calls it (read: the look my boss gets when he enters my cube). She still says my face completly morphs when I see him.

It's alright with my friends, it's like a mutual sense. We'll both turn away while talking and then look back. Eye contact is really relevant to your level of comfort with the other person.

Omygod. Finally! Other people who understand how painfully awkward it can get when staring into a person's eye. Seriously I never used to have this problem before, but after working more and more at home I started to lose a lot of my social skills. This resulted in me slowly developing an awkwardness when looking at people in general. It feels really invasive for me. It's like what do you want? lol What do you want to know? What kind of reaction are you expecting?

Hi dso

It is self-confidence I'd probably advise you to be more comfortable within yourself, once you get this everything else follows. It takes time and you'll get it just keep practising regardless of the setbacks Don't think too much about it otherwise you psyche yourself out and then you lose confidence Not everyone looking at you will judge you negatively Gain confidence little by little and grow from that

You need to put yourself in social situations like family gatherings, meeting up with mates, playing social games even (sports builds confidence) you don't have to be A+ player just participation is enough as it helps to develop your skills (you won't even know it ). I do this all the time with family and friends. We have social sports teams and we gradually bring in our young ones to help build up their confidence and skills Clubbing - if you're into that makes good practise grounds even when you go shopping and stuff. If you frequently see people on a daily basis who you don't communicate with normally, for once just smile or say hello It's not hard you don't have to say anything else other than that When I bus to and from work, there are the regulars, I'd just smile or say hello. There's a rapport there built on familiarity

I'm quite confident in a one-on-one situation or group presentation regardless the numbers. I focus on quality and accurate delivery of my message but at all times being sincere and tailored for the situation. Also, when I'm out and about on a daily basis: I'll smile and say hello to a stranger passing by if we're in close proximity, all the time making eye contact Most people reply and then a couple will be like

You can tell a lot about a person who looks at you while talking or if they don't There's all different reasons Just because a person avoids eye contact does not necessarily mean they lack confidence or substance

A lot of people will judge you by the book at first but if you can communicate effectively using eye contact, you'll be able to weed out the fake from the truly sincere I get it all the time, then we'll have the play of the eyes as to who can maintain longer eye contact - it's like power play.

Good luck, this is one of those things that comes with a lot of practise and experience

In my psychology class, my professor mentioned that normal amount of eye contact is 60% eye contact.

But I think it's different depending on your culture as well. In Western cultures, it's considered impolite not to give eye contact, but in Eastern cultures, it can be the other way around (you don't stare at your parents when they're lecturing you...at least I didn't when I was little).

I think eye contact was a hard thing to get used to, plus I often get lost in the person's eyes (especially light colored eyes!), thus getting distracted. But it really does make things more personable, let's the person know you ARE listening.

I find it difficult with people that have that cross-eyed/lazy eye deal going on. Which eye should I focus on? The one looking somewhat at me - or should I try to maneuver myself so that I'm 'addressing' the other eye?
Shoot, what I end up doing is looking over my shoulder wondering what the hell that one eye is looking at.
The last time I did that, the guy got so insulted and refused to serve me my Happy Meal over the counter.