So, I kind of need to rant about this, and would like to hear some input from you other lovely Soompiers.

There's this girl I know. We're not friends, we've just spoken a couple of times and have some mutual friends. My birthday was early September, and I had expressed that one of the things I would like is extensions. She's a hair dresser, and she jumped at the chance to do them for me. I told her I didn't have the money to pay for something like that, and she said not to worry about it, she'll do all of it and pay for all of it for me for my birthday. I agreed. She sounded really excited, and said that she loves doing hair.

Yesterday, I get a message from her asking if I would do some modeling photographs for her for her make-up portfolio. Honestly, I'm not really into taking pictures of myself. I take pictures once every like, two or three months, and it's usually just for hair or circle lenses, and especially lately, I've had some weight fluctuation issues and haven't exactly been "comfortable in my own skin," if you understand. I just feel more awkward than usual would be the best way to put it. I tried explaining this in a nice way, that it's just not something I felt comfortable with doing, and she replied with "Oh don't worry, you can consider it pay back for me doing your hair."

Pay back? For a birthday present that you wanted to do for me? If I would have known that I would have to pay back in something that I don't even feel comfortable doing, then I wouldn't have done it at all.

She has a bit of a reputation, also. She's been put away for being "crazy," has a lot of instances with cops for threatening people, and when I was with her getting my hair done, she was telling me about how she went to her brothers ex-girlfriends house to beat her ass over a pair of sunglasses that her brother left there. The ex-girlfriend put a restraining order on this girl, and she was saying how she thinks the restraining order is out of line.

I don't really want to get on this girls bad side, I don't need her coming an hour and a half (another reason I don't want to go model for her, it's an hour and a half drive, and we aren't exactly loaded in cash or gas) to do whatever she sees fit just because she feels like I owe her something when I don't feel like I do.

So what do you guys think? Am I being totally ungrateful or is she being difficult?

You're being totally ungrateful and she's being difficult.

i think for her, doing your hair was more of a favor to you than a present for you. she sounds like one of those people that "voluntarily does things" only for their own benefit later on.

take the damn pictures and save yourself lol
sounds like she might take a curling iron to your face if you don't

That's what it seems like, at least, it seems like that after this.

I think that even though its not the best timing, you should still do whatever shes asked of you.
It was nice of her to do the extensions for you cause that's time and money.
So just return the favour because what shes asking of you is not very difficult.

I don't think you're being ungrateful. She offered the extensions as a GIFT, meaning she shouldn't be asking for something in return. Pretty lame. I'd probably do the pictures anyway, though, unless you're really just strapped for cash and can't make it out there.

umm oh wow.
sounds like some kinda show there....
explain it to her one more time
and if she doesnt get it
DO IT.
SAVE YOURE PRETTY LITTLE FACE AND DO IT.
she sounds like she can seriously use some therapy. or yoga.
OMG GO TO YOGA CLASSES WITH HER.
it should calm her down... for at least.... uhh. some time.

youre not being ungrateful, i hate it when they do that.
'pay back' like wth? since when did i owe you?

wow, even you have problems.. don't think this negatively but it makes me feel so much better knowing that social gurus have life troubles too

there is only 1 way out.. take the pictures like she asked and then block her in every way possible. therefore, no awkwardness and no revenge on your head

Normally you're the one giving advice lol!

I think you should just take the pictures, if they're just face pictures. If you're not comfortable withh any other part of your body explain to her that you don't want to.. But if it's just a makeup portfolio, why not?

Take the pics and get out of this mess ASAP.. and try not to have to deal with her again! :X

I think you were careless more then anything. I mean, honestly, in today's times even people who REALLY know each other only give gifts to each other in order to kind of "guarantee" themselves something when it's their turn. So yeah, but she's a total whack job.

But if you really want to get rid of her for $5k I know people who can make her disappear.

I would just suck it up, do it, call it even, and try not to deal with or accept anything from her from now on.

i agree with everyone saying you should just do the photo shoot to get this problem off your chest.
but at the same time i dont think its fair that you should give in to her just because shes a psycho(no offense), maybe she just needs a really good lecturing to get that through her head?

on another note, im pretty sure you were grateful. she gave you a present that you wanted, what shes doing is practically taking it back... hmmm rip out your extensions and give them back? just joking

It might not be very difficult for her. She doesn't have to drive an hour and a half and pay the gas money for it when she doesn't have a job >.>


It's so expensive, not to mention last time we went we got really lost because she gives awful directions, being crazy and all.


I have lots of problems, I just don't post about them because my life isn't the least bit interesting.

To everyone: I really just don't want to see her ever again, lol. I thanked her very much for the work she did on my hair and offered to pay for them. She said "Oh no no, don't even think about it! I love doing your hair you never have to pay for anything with me!"

I guess when she said I'll never have to pay for anything, she literally meant "pay" with money >.> Anything else is up for grabs.

For $5k they can't possibly be any good.

you kidding? you are one of the those few interesting people that make this damn site..

you avoid her and pray to god that the crazy pinkberry doesn't bit your head off. although avoiding any person completely isn't very realistic.. Here, why don't you tell her that you have horrible acne and you will get back to her once your face clears up, which is never in your case.

So it's half a tank of gas and your time vs. having a crazy person be completely upset with you.


Your call, I guess.

Not mine, my boyfriends. If it was my own money I'd be wasting I'd be more willing, but I'm not really selfish like that.

You can *casually bring up that you'll be available the next time she rolls into your town...

i dont know. I just dont want her to go crazy on your arse...

Hahaha, I decided I hope she does something crazy. I'd love to sue a ho and have tons of money. XD.

...and you said your life wasn't interesting...

Considering how she has "issues", I say just take the pictures. Since it's a portfolio, I don't think a lot of people will be seeing them? Even if there is, they probably won't know who you are.

From my point of view, having her take pictures of you is probably much better than what you might face if you refuse her. She definitely doesn't seem like the type who will let things go (unless you move to the other side of the world).

Doing extensions and all that crap takes alot of time and effort, not to mention it's expensive (unless you bought the hair yourself). Why would you even accept a "birthday present" like that from someone you barely know? Not only that you two aren't that good of friends but also, you knew that she was "crazy" from start yet you still agreed to letting her do your hair? I'm sorry but that was pretty careless of you and you kind of got yourself into this mess by trusting people so easily. You should just do the photoshoot for her and then be over with it, and hope that she won't bring up the extensions for another favour in the future. She sounds scary.

Because she offered. I thought it was fair to assume that when someone offers to do something for you, they aren't going to later turn it around on you and expect something in return, especially when it's something they say they want to do.

I guess it just goes to show that I still give women too much credit. I didn't know her well, but I thought it would be a nice experience to get to hang out with her and see who she really is as a person, not just as an internet person. I guess that was my mistake.

If I was in your position I would've accepted it too. Free extensions.
But back on topic...it'd probably be safer for you to do it considering she's on the insane side.
It's unfair that she's asking you for a "payback" but it's happened so just "pay her back" and then stop all communications.
Can't she go to you? Can't you tell her of these issues of the drive and money and tell her that if she really wants you to model for her then she should come to you. Or even just lie and tell her the car broke down.
If she wasn't on the crazy side I would've just told you to confront her and tell her that the extensions were a gift and there is no need for you to repay her back in any form.

^ Yeah, what she said.
Have you tried telling her that you can't fork out money for gas? Say you'd love to do it but you just don't have the money. I lie just to get me out of situations like that, heh.

Or maybe just try telling her you're not feeling pretty atm and you'd be willing to do it some other time if she wants. If she still insists, I don't know. Let her go crazy.

i agree with RYUUSEi. you may have gotten yourself into this mess , but then again YOU weren't expecting her to suddenly turn this into something that SHE could use against you because SHE did say it was a birthday present. since when do you have to pay someone back for a present they voluntarily offered to get you for your birthday ? she should never have called it a birthday present if it wasn't actually one.

but anywhooo~ i suppose it's either "do it" or "get ready for her to pop out from under your covers unexpectedly", kind of situation .. oo , or maybe from behind your shower curtain wielding a machete ? iunno , but i'd suggest not becoming total besties with her while she is still insane and able.

You shouldn't have accepted the extensions in the first place, because 1. you already know of her "crazy" background and tendencies, and 2. she's not even a good friend, or a friend for that matter. It should have alarmed "trouble, trouble" ; and there you have it now, trouble.

She is being unreasonable though, since she DID say it was a birthday present. What do you think she'll do if you don't take the pictures? I would just use an excuse, like "my boyfriend doesn't want me to take the pictures."

Just do it but please stop talking to her after that. Keep a distance.

Yeah, I realize I forgot to say, she told me about all of her craziness DURING the extension trip, like, while I was with her. That's when she decided to drop the crazy-bomb about how she has a restraining order against her and tried to cut a girl over some sunglasses.

However, that excuse about my boyfriend is reeeally good, I did not even think of that. You are wonderful.

Thanks everyone for the input, I very much appreciate it. Watch out for crazy girls.

i say you do it or else she's going to find another excuse to have you "repay" her.
she sounds like a person you don't want to mess with.

haha, she sounds like a b.itch to me. LOL.

When I'm in China, expecting something in return for gifts is very common around the people I know. I've been very wary of accepting gifts as a result.

Anyway, ignore the woman and go on with your life.

hot damn.

Okay. First, no one can force you to do what you don't want to. Depending on your mental constitution.

Second, she might be crazy, but if anything happens, you still have the right to defend yourself.

Third, this might be useful for you: http://www.wonderhowto.com/how-to/video/ho...akedown-109773/

just remember that video is shown in demonstration speed. You might have to move faster for it to work.

I don't you should take favors from ANYONE. My mom always warns me not to take favors from people just in case they want to take advantage of you later.

I guess the next time you take a favor, and the other party is doing it for free, have it in a written document.

You shouldnt if you feel uncomfortable. You'll just be leading her on, making her think that you're okay with being around her when you really dont. Just tell her you're super busy. Haha. Can she not get someone else to do it for her??

Later no crazy peeps doin ya hair. Now just say sorry I don't wanna do it & dont b scurred!

i would have just told her that i was "busy"
i would not let a crazy person anywhere near my head!
if she does do something to you, good luck, and call the cops
and besides, she seems like one of those people who would give a gift but would always pester a person to give them something back