I'm already 17 and I have got NO experience of Love. I don't think that I'm so ugly or fat or something. But I don't seem to be grabbing the attention of any guys.
All my friends tell me that I'm really cute and good hearted.
Any suggestions? What can i do become more noticeable?
No freaky answers please.
Anyone with same problem as mine?

Don't worry about it your still young. You got many years ahead and college would break the ice as your gonna meet many girls there.

As I've said before in a similar thread, the most important thing you can do at this point in your life is find a sense of who you are, and what you want to do in life. What you shape to be your identity will give you the direction and confidence you need in the coming years.

Believe me, you're not going to experience much of a meaningful relationship at your age, with how people are developing.

You just haven't crossed paths with your Prince Charming yet. Or maybe you did, but you were so caught up in your thoughts that you just didn't notice. You can't force love to spring up on you, so don't worry so much and just go with the flow.

confidence is really important. And doing ur own thing- ie not being fake.

But hey, alotta guys (asns esp) like cutesy, squeal y, delicate, submissive asian girls. lol, but don't be like that.

I am 19 and in the same situation. The only guys that asked me out were weird guys that i had no interest in. haha. Don't worry, wait until college, maybe then you can find the right guy. I think you should just be yourself and if a guy likes you, then you know he likes you for you. Sounds corny but that is what i think.

If you really want to be more noticeable to guys...i guess you need to hang out with more guys or talk to them. I have no clue. XD

Maybe it's your fashion sense?

Maybe instead of being more "attractive" to guys (since attractive is really a very subjective term depending on the guy in question) you should make yourself more distinct from other girls. And I think ability to hold a conversation is pretty important, like if a guy isn't able to hold a decent conversation I'd totally find it a turn off. :X Don't be one of those girls who's just like "Hey, what's up, how's your day?" and that's the end of the conversation. Or if you're in a group, don't just sit there quietly and go along with what everyone else says, haha. Get out there and be yourself! ( And I totally agree with mintcracker, lol)

I think cute and good hearted to us girls doesn't necessarily mean that the guys think so as well, lol. From what I've seen with my guy friends, girls and guys have VERY different opinions on what pretty is, who is girlfriend material, and stuff like that. I have a friend who is extremely good-natured, and IMO would make perfect gf/wife material, but she doesn't seem to grab the attention of guys. [shrugs]

confidence. and being your natural self should do it. comfortability is important.

Confidence does it for you. I think it's really not about putting flour all over your face.

Pro tip: No matter how much you're doing it already, you should smile more!

Lol @ All the 'confidence' replies. No, the real answer is "wear a miniskirt and high heels". Take it from a guy, it works.

like many of the posters say, confidence is number 1.
do not try to change yourself for someone.
never be afraid to voice out your opinion and never let other people push you down.
smile more and try to make your conversation with guys more interesting.
you can talk to most guys about anything that's not girly.
and you have to make them feel comfortable around you.
when they're comfortable, they'll eventually hang around you more.
a lot of my guy friends come up to me to get a girl's opinion about love. o_o

gofishus:
lol at your suggestion.
i dont think she meant attractive in that way. xD

17 is really really young....
dont worry !

From a guy:

You have it or you don't.

Depending on how large you are, you could always lose a few lbs.
Wear make up
Wear a bit more revealing clothes - or clothes that accent your figure.
Smile more often
Hang out with prettier girls
Actually go out to places where guys are.

Guys are visual creatures.

Maybe you're just paying too much attention to the hot, popular studs instead of looking at the other 90% of men that are less outgoing, don't stand out as much, and may be shy.

I'm curious how you would justify that you don't catch "any" guys' attention. Is it because they don't approach you?

The obvious answer is to get breast implants.

Attractiveness_{Princess257^{=f((Drinks Consumed}}target male_{^{/hr)X Base Attractiveness}}Princess257_⁾


Understanding and applying this formula is the key to your success.

Just don't try too hard.

Be yourself and someone will show up in your life who will appreciate you for who you are. You just haven't met him yet. ^.^

Good luck!!!

lol @ koreanballads

SUre confidence is one thing.. have you ever tried talking to any one? If you're not pretty don't expect guys to notice you from out of no where. =T

Though it seems shallow, I tend to agree with the guys who said that it's likely a fashion sense thing. That doesn't mean dressing like a floozy, it just means that most (not all) like a girl who looks like she cares about her appearance (doesn't always wear sweats and a t-shirt, wears some skirts and dresses as opposed to always wearing jeans and a t-shirt (t-shirts are kind of my pet peeve if you can't already tell lol), knows how to use (and not overuse) make-up, etc. <--Those are things most guys inherently like, but don't realize that they do.

If you feel you already dress just fine, though, the problem may be that you're not assertive enough. A girl usually grabs my interest when either: a.) She's a knockout, or b.) She shows some interest in me. At that point I consider whether she's my type, and if she is I pursue her. If you seem kind of passive, unless the guy thinks you're gorgeous, he probably won't go out of his way to pursue you.

Confidence.
I've seen the aesthetically ugliest girls get the cutest guys because of it.
& don't mistake it for cockiness/arrogance.

I think that this is good advice. Be confident, be assertive, wear clothes that fit, take care of your appearance, and guys will notice. =)

me...lol....but Im ugly and fat.....and my friends tell me I'm cute too...I think they're lying...<.< I hope I'm cute ^^

I agree with what he said. You don't have to dress inappropriately to get a guys attention, at least, you probably don't want the kind of guy that will give you that attention. It's situations like this where you could say that "not all attention is good attention" ya know? Something as simple as a nice dress, a nice skirt, and hey, even though it's not for Lie, a nice fitting pair of jeans and a shirt does wonders, especially if YOU feel comfortable, and YOU feel like you rock it. Remember, you could buy the shortest skirt and the top with the least amount of material, but if you don't even feel comfortable in it, then what's the point?

Even still, like someone already said, you're still pretty young, and like I said in a different thread, I could have saved myself a lot of trouble if I just waited to date, waited for someone who wasn't a scrub. Don't be in such a hurry, you really don't miss out on many great relationship opportunities in high school.

Confidence
Confidence
Confidence
Confidence


I have noooo problem with guys because I was a tomboy growing up I'm just another one of the guys. Hell.. if you have brothers start hanging out with em so you can understand boys better. The more you like yourself, and understand "boys" in general.. you can fill in the blanks and figure it out

Make guy friends first! Guy friends will be the first to tell you allll the things that guys like/dislike.. they're great!

in before beauty & fashion forum on soompi. go there, tons of tips.
honestly the 'personality' thing is bullmini cooper. without looks, how do they get to know your personality? mini cooper guys, don't lie anymore please~~ haha

well- you didn't mention that you're in a good condition with guys? maybe that's your problem?

Confidence is more a thing that both genders need to attract the opposite sex. But if you're trying to attract boys, it's horribly easy to do. Just look nice. We men are simple creatures, and it's evidenced by the things we buy and flaunt that we think look "cool" "shiny" or "pretty." Any guy who says otherwise is lying through their teeth. Any guy you think doesn't fall into this category, you would not want to know what they are thinking of the matter. I'm not bashing dudes, I'm just saying, that's how our brains are hard-wired to function.


God, I only wish I were joking. :<

agreed. confidence is important, but if you don't look good (and by that, i mean presentable; you don't necessarily have to look like a model) they're probably not going to pay much attention to you. and of course, you're still young - most guys your age are probably still running after the first girl they see in a short skirt and revealing top lol.

If a guy likes you for your looks, then that's just ridiculous. You shouldn't have to worry about having to look good for them ; just wait.

yeah, as we grow up, looks is getting less important.

It's very simple. You might be nice, but no one knows unless you tell (and prove) to them so.
And unless you are prettier than average girls, guys won't find you attractive enough to chat u up.

Oh and btw, you said your friends think you're pretty and you think you're 'not ugly'. That's what EVERYONE says. I freakn hate it when people use that in forums to describe themselves. no one will ever tell you in ur face that you're ugly, even if you are, ok? (unless you know me, cuz I will tell you straight up.) So look in the freakn mirror and ask urself, AM I PRETTY, AM I ATTRACTIVE? if not, DO something about it, don't just pretend you're pretty cuz ur friends told you so.

From what I've learned from guys, first, most guys like their girls skinny or toned, with curves, but NEVER EVER fat (unless he's got some crazy fetish, im sure u don want to attract those), if you're chubby, you COULD be alright, some guys are fine with it, but for your own good, loose some lbs anyways.

2nd, face is most important after a guy actually decides to check you out. and it doesn't matter how pretty you look naturally, wear some make up! its not necessarily to cover up flaws, it's also used to accenturate your features.

3rd. dress well. I guess since you're still pretty young, it doesn't matter as much, but wear things that fits you well at least. no baggy/gym pants please.

finally, heels, always a plus. trust me, some guys get turned on just by hearing the sound of the heels clicking, lol, true story.

girl...i know SO MANY others who are in the same boat as you.
but i also know a lot of college friends who end up finding somebody when they reached college.
dont sweat it!

She knows her stuff...

Guys don't have to LIKE you FOR your looks, but you NEED to look good for them to willing to approach you and get to know you.
If you're fat and ugly, why would they even bother to talk- in fact, why would they even bother to LOOK at you? honestly speaking, do you like looking at ugly things? Cuz I most definitely don't.
and you're not looking good FOR THEM, you look good for yourself. the guys that get attracted are just the side effects.





infact, for women, looks get more important as you get old.
and for men, it's their band account. : P

it's true, and it makes sense to me even tho I don't like it that much, too sexist imo.
But anyways, looks are important for women, always. even if you're married, I'm sure your husband still prefer you looked young and beautiful. Not saying he'd dump you if you weren't, but it's just one of those nice things that are nice to have.

Everyone else already said it; confidence.
But it's easier said than done; especially if you have a low-self esteem and may be a little shy. (Like I do)
If you have a low selfesteem, I have a few tips for you

- Go look at yourself in the mirror and say out loud what you like about yourself. (For example; I like my eyes because every says their almond shaped )
- Now pick your flaunts and say what you can do to turn them around. (For example; I don't like my lovehandles, so I'm excersising a little and watching what i'm eating and stuff =])
- Now focus on your best assets, "If you got 'm, flaunt them." , if you have nice leggs, show them off! If you have
pretty eyes, accentuate them! If you have a curvy figure, be proud of it.
The key is to feel comfortable in your own skin.
It also helps to tell yourself that you're pretty, just every day when you look in the mirror, (I know it sounds superficial but it really works. Because you'll start believing it.) And if you keep comparing yourself (like I do) to other girls you should just think; "Hey she has nice hair or a nice face but I'm pretty to, in my own way."
When you feel comfortable, boys will notice it too. And don't be afraid to change your look or anything; but just be yourself. If you always had long brown straight hair, try to get highlights and layers. Use a little make up (remember less is more) to accentuate your features, such as your cheekbones or eyes or lips. And dress like you want to but also what works best for your body. The more you start 'taking care' of your body, the more you'll learn to love it and stuff. That's how you'll build your confidence and that's what attracts guys =]. (But remember, you're doing this for yourself!)

Maybe you should try talking to more guys? Just don't try too hard.

Just wait for it to come around, don't force it or chase after it, if you force it, you won't be happy... Good luck in finding waiting for love!

awww... don't worry ur not alone!...
i'm 17 too...and have no bf.
but i guess, at this age i realize that it's not that important yet.
i'm having some college crisis that's probably why i'm more focus on education now than anything else.
my suggestion is that, if those tips that the other soompiers gave u doesn't work, then the best thing to do is try to shift ur attention to other things than getting a guy to like u, maybe try to do better at school, hangout with ur friends more and ask for their advice, and just enjoy life ^^
don't worry, to make u feel better there are actually aloooot older girls than u who hasn't found the right guy for them yet. until ur not 30 and still doesn't have a bf. then start to worry.

Well if you just want a relationship that doesn't go the whole nine yards i.e. marriage, then you should focus on physical features more (e.g. body, hair, and whatnot)

=====================

If you do actually plan on marriage, then don't bother to change (maybe except for living a healthy lifestyle so you can enjoy growing old with that s/o).



http://www.divorcerate.org/ will give you percentages for other major countries i.e. Canada, UK, Australia, etc.

Anyway... wait for someone that will accept you and love you for who you are, that way you can have a much happier marriage.

My mum gave me huge talk about this. She was saying how even though guys will notice your looks first, it doesn't matter in the end if you've got a crappy personality.
Don't be shy, make friends and be yourself around them. Most of my guy friends went out with girls they got along with well, ones they could talk to and spend time with.

Don't worry, love!

You're only 17 and you've got a loong way to go before you meet the man of your life!
Just keep your chin up and always be confident no matter what!

Confidence and humor attracts boys like carcuses to flies. There's nothing more attractive than a girl who is comfortable with herself. Don't fake it though. Take some time to figure out what ur weak points are and work on it. That accomplishment of doing something for urself increase ur confidence in urself. Weird, but it works for me.

maybe ur just not readi?
ur still young uve got plenty of time to experince love n heart break

is a woman's existence, self value, self-esteem, happiness, social power or attractiveness dependent on how much value men gives her?

_ just be honest. he'll think he's special .

..lol. dude. you're only 17.
i had my first relationship when i was .. 16?
but i got into my first serious relationship when i was 18.
although my past relationships were a good experience..
but idk. i could've lived without them.

i was single for an entire year.
and then came along a boyyy.. and we started dating.
he was completely worth the wait.

: D don't give up hope.

seriously.

You're still young, don't worry about boys. At that age, most of them just care about who dates the hottest looking girl. But what is in important now and later on is to have confidence and be yourself. My ex always said "It doesn't matter how good a person looks now because it won't last forever. However, personality does."

I understand that many of the people around you probably have had relationships, but maybe you're just not ready. I'm 18 and I haven't had a relationship yet. It's not because I'm ugly or not confident or whatever. It's because I choose to be single. Just put yourself out there more, like talk to more guys, be active, and have fun! Don't obsess over yourself; it's not attractive.

Also, ignore anyone who told you to wear revealing clothes, get breast implants (wth, seriously? -.- that's like me telling you to enlarge your AHEM), etc. Be yourself, find yourself.

So what are you saying? That if I was fat and ugly I would be looked down upon and labeled as 'ugly'? I disagree with this completely. Maybe theoritically speaking, first impressions matters. So of course if it was the first time I was meeting this guy, then yeah us girls would probably want to look our best. But as far as I'm concerned, a guy should be able to like you even when it's at your worse.