Posted 13 December 2008 - 03:58 PM
I'm so sad right now. I know you never have any intentions of making me cry but you did. I thought we could be mature adults and work out our differences. Like I stated before, I want us to be friends. You promised me that you wouldn't ask me for anything. You said you would give me time. That is the only reason why I agreed to go out to dinner last night with you. I wanted to be your friend, so as a friend, I went to dinner with you because it was your birthday. How can you make me feel guilty for leaving you? Hell, you are not the only one upset. You are not the only hurt. I spent countless nights crying myself to sleep, not eating, vomitting, being sick, and avoiding the closest people around me. I shut myself from reality in order to get over you. I admit, I still love you and need you. Did you think it was easy for me to wake up every damn morning knowing that our relationship is over? Why must you open up old wounds when I'm at a current state of learning to heal? I'm sorry, I can't go back to the way things were before. I think it was a big mistake meeting up with you. I hope you enjoy my gift. If you want to keep a friendship with me, I'm here and willing. But if you keep on pressuring me back into the relationship, I'll permanently remove myself out of your life. What happened to you? It seems we both changed. I still love you, please believe me. But now is the time where I need to be by myself and learn how to stand on my own two feet. I hate the fact that I was getting better and meeting you again changed it all. But since yesterday, I've been depressed thinking about the pain I caused you. I wasn't able to finish my research paper. When I took my final today, I wasn't able to concentrate. Not only do I have a broken heart, I also have a failing grade in Food Chemistry.