There was a baker that had two uncooked muffins. He put the muffins in the oven.
Muffin #1:Whoa it's hot in here.
Muffin #2:HOLY CRAP! A TALKING MUFFIN!
hahaaha
Short Joke Thread Jokes that are less than 5 lines - POST THEM HERE ; PLS READ 1ST POST
#101
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Posted 01 August 2008 - 09:20 PM
i heard this joke a long time ago but it still cracks me up.
There was a baker that had two uncooked muffins. He put the muffins in the oven.
Muffin #1:Whoa it's hot in here.
Muffin #2:HOLY CRAP! A TALKING MUFFIN!
hahaaha
There was a baker that had two uncooked muffins. He put the muffins in the oven.
Muffin #1:Whoa it's hot in here.
Muffin #2:HOLY CRAP! A TALKING MUFFIN!
hahaaha
#102
- 거짓말.
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Posted 02 August 2008 - 12:15 AM
These made me laugh to myself in front of the computer. No wonder I got strange looks... ^^
I've heard this before, but that just made me LOL.
Hahahahaha, that was a good one. XD
Lol! Loser.
A man went fishing and caught a fish in the dam.
When he came home for dinner that night, he said to his wife,
"Please pass the dam fish, honey."
His son replied, "That's the spirit dad! Pass the f***king potatoes."
That was hilarious!
QUOTE (jinballer_05 @ Mar 25 2008, 09:23 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
-Three guys had one wish each. For the wish to come true they had to jump from a ledge and yell out what they wanted and they would land in it.
The first jumped off yelled gold. He landed in a pile of gold.
The second jumped off and yelled cash. He landed in a pile of cash.
The third ran and was about to jump when he slipped off the ledge... SH*************t.
The first jumped off yelled gold. He landed in a pile of gold.
The second jumped off and yelled cash. He landed in a pile of cash.
The third ran and was about to jump when he slipped off the ledge... SH*************t.
I've heard this before, but that just made me LOL.
QUOTE (eternal_bliss @ Jun 9 2008, 09:04 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Want to hear a dirty joke?
A little boy jumped into a puddle of mud.
Want to hear a clean joke?
He took a bath with bubbles.
Want to hear a dirty joke?
Bubbles was the girl next doors.
A little boy jumped into a puddle of mud.
Want to hear a clean joke?
He took a bath with bubbles.
Want to hear a dirty joke?
Bubbles was the girl next doors.
Hahahahaha, that was a good one. XD
QUOTE (ayunda @ Jun 18 2008, 02:18 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
hmmph i've got one too, so
a guy is talking to a long-distance telephone operator.
guy : "COULD YOU PLEASE TELL ME THE TIME DIFFERENCE BETWEEN TAIPEI AND LAS VEGAS ?"
Operator : "JUST A MINUTE..."
guy : "THANK YOU ", and puts down the phone.
a guy is talking to a long-distance telephone operator.
guy : "COULD YOU PLEASE TELL ME THE TIME DIFFERENCE BETWEEN TAIPEI AND LAS VEGAS ?"
Operator : "JUST A MINUTE..."
guy : "THANK YOU ", and puts down the phone.
Lol! Loser.
QUOTE (cordial @ Jul 13 2008, 07:34 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A man went fishing and caught a fish in the dam.
When he came home for dinner that night, he said to his wife,
"Please pass the dam fish, honey."
His son replied, "That's the spirit dad! Pass the f***king potatoes."
That was hilarious!
#103
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Posted 02 August 2008 - 01:14 AM
QUOTE (LoveStoned @ Jul 26 2008, 10:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
There was a blonde at a stoplight and it said walk. She started walking and, when she was in the middle of the street, the sign turned to don't walk. So she stopped.
wth! xD
Thats a good one. haha.
QUOTE (SimpleDiem @ Jul 29 2008, 10:03 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Why did Trigger look into the toilet
>>becuz he was looking for POOh
>>becuz he was looking for POOh
teehee. this is ftw! xD
QUOTE (b1gb4ng1rl @ Jul 31 2008, 11:48 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This isn't really a joke but it's too short for a new topic:
Good: Your son studies a lot in his room.
Bad: You find several pornographic movies hidden there.
Ugly: You're in them.
Good: Your son studies a lot in his room.
Bad: You find several pornographic movies hidden there.
Ugly: You're in them.
damn. that sucks. xD
ツ________________________________________________________________________________ Lisa & Meena ♥
#104
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Posted 05 August 2008 - 05:47 PM
"I have CDO. It's like OCD but with the letters in alphabetical order, like they're supposed to be."
Psyc joke tehe, from Reader's Digest
Psyc joke tehe, from Reader's Digest
#105
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Posted 17 August 2008 - 08:16 AM
what starts with a "P" & ends in "ORN"....
Sickos!
.. POPCORN, DUHHH. Lol. :]
what starts with a "F" & ends in "UCK"....
lololol, FIRETRUCKK!!!
This one is a riddle; what starts with a T, has T in it, & ends in a T?
Teapot!
...
That's all I could remember. LOL. well, here's a little poem I'd like to share with you.
If I was a dog,
& you were a flower,
I'd lift up my leg,
to give you a shower!!
<3 yeahhh.
Sickos!
.. POPCORN, DUHHH. Lol. :]what starts with a "F" & ends in "UCK"....
lololol, FIRETRUCKK!!!
This one is a riddle; what starts with a T, has T in it, & ends in a T?
Teapot!
...That's all I could remember. LOL. well, here's a little poem I'd like to share with you.
If I was a dog,
& you were a flower,
I'd lift up my leg,
to give you a shower!!
<3 yeahhh.
#106
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Posted 17 August 2008 - 09:39 PM
haha this one is kinda dirty, well not really
what kind of bee makes milk?
BOO-BEES
what kind of bee makes milk?
BOO-BEES
#108
- Jina sempai :)
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Posted 21 August 2008 - 11:00 AM
Let me tell you how you can tell nice people from mean people.
CROSS THE ROAD.
If they stop to let you cross, then they are nice.
If they run you over, they are not nice.
----------
okay, if you think logically, (cause my LOGICAL sister brought this up )
they HAVE to stop if they don't wanna go to jail...
okay, i know but hey? who cares...this was funny....
and guess what? I made it up. LOL.
CROSS THE ROAD.
If they stop to let you cross, then they are nice.
If they run you over, they are not nice.
----------
okay, if you think logically, (cause my LOGICAL sister brought this up
)they HAVE to stop if they don't wanna go to jail...
okay, i know but hey? who cares...this was funny....
and guess what? I made it up. LOL.
Been on HIATUS for a LONG, LONG time. For that, I apologize sincerely. I'm back now, and I'm gonna finish what I started.
#109
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Posted 26 August 2008 - 12:59 AM
"10 commandments of being a teenager:
1. Thou shall not sneak out when there parents are sleeping (why wait?)
2. Thou shall not do drugs (alcohol lasts longer)
3. Thou shall not steal from K-mart (Walmart has a bigger selection)
4. Thou shall not get arrested for vandalism (destruction has a bigger effect)
5. Thou shall not steal from their parents (everyone knows Grandma has more money)
6. Thou shall not get into fights (start them)
7. Thou shall not skip class (take the whole day off)
8. Thou shall not go to strip clubs (Hooters has better food)
9. Thou shall not think about having sex (like Nike says... just do it)
10. Thou shall not help old ladies cross the street (leave them in the middle)"
--
You know why God is a man? Because if God was a woman she would have made sperm taste like chocolate.
--
Two people are sitting at a bar drinking, one of them turns to the other and says
"You arent irish by any chance are you?"
"Why yes I am",replied the other man
"Fancy that! Where abouts in Ireland are you from?"
"Dublin"
"Cor! Me 2"
"Really, where did you graduate?"
"St Marys"
"Me too!! What year?"
"1986"
"Oh my God! So did i!"
The bar man sighed "Its going to be a long night... The O Malley twins are drunk again."
1. Thou shall not sneak out when there parents are sleeping (why wait?)
2. Thou shall not do drugs (alcohol lasts longer)
3. Thou shall not steal from K-mart (Walmart has a bigger selection)
4. Thou shall not get arrested for vandalism (destruction has a bigger effect)
5. Thou shall not steal from their parents (everyone knows Grandma has more money)
6. Thou shall not get into fights (start them)
7. Thou shall not skip class (take the whole day off)
8. Thou shall not go to strip clubs (Hooters has better food)
9. Thou shall not think about having sex (like Nike says... just do it)
10. Thou shall not help old ladies cross the street (leave them in the middle)"
--
You know why God is a man? Because if God was a woman she would have made sperm taste like chocolate.
--
Two people are sitting at a bar drinking, one of them turns to the other and says
"You arent irish by any chance are you?"
"Why yes I am",replied the other man
"Fancy that! Where abouts in Ireland are you from?"
"Dublin"
"Cor! Me 2"
"Really, where did you graduate?"
"St Marys"
"Me too!! What year?"
"1986"
"Oh my God! So did i!"
The bar man sighed "Its going to be a long night... The O Malley twins are drunk again."
#110
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Posted 26 August 2008 - 10:22 AM
This isn't really a joke but it's too short for a new topic:
Good: Your son studies a lot in his room.
Bad: You find several pornographic movies hidden there.
Ugly: You're in them.
LMFAO. EWW.
haha this one is kinda dirty, well not really
what kind of bee makes milk?
BOO-BEES
LOL. I'm so immature.
Did you see the movie 'Constipation?'
NO! Cause it never came out!
;]
ROFL. Good one.
Good: Your son studies a lot in his room.
Bad: You find several pornographic movies hidden there.
Ugly: You're in them.
LMFAO. EWW.
haha this one is kinda dirty, well not really
what kind of bee makes milk?
BOO-BEES
LOL. I'm so immature.
Did you see the movie 'Constipation?'
NO! Cause it never came out!
;]
ROFL. Good one.
/oct 23 2009 formerly endless.Dream.
I love when my heart smiles.____________
_______© ningenningen at LJ & iridescent.
I love when my heart smiles.____________
_______© ningenningen at LJ & iridescent.
#111
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Posted 26 August 2008 - 05:58 PM
not so much a joke,but my friend saw it on some guy's bumper sticker and we thought it was kinda funny... lol
i suffer from CRS.
cant remember mini cooper
i suffer from CRS.
cant remember mini cooper
#112
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Posted 26 August 2008 - 06:35 PM
THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
--
The brunette asked the blonde why there were bullet holes in the mirror. The blonde replied, "because I tried to commit suicide...it didn't work".
1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.
--
The brunette asked the blonde why there were bullet holes in the mirror. The blonde replied, "because I tried to commit suicide...it didn't work".
#113
- ☆ Fly like a KT ☆
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Posted 27 August 2008 - 12:03 AM
A tall man in a crowded elevator was complaining,
"All I can smell is perfume, shampoos, hair tonic, creams, gels & dandruff! It's Terrible!!
A voice from way down below said, "What about me?...... I'm a Midget!"
"All I can smell is perfume, shampoos, hair tonic, creams, gels & dandruff! It's Terrible!!
A voice from way down below said, "What about me?...... I'm a Midget!"
#114
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Posted 31 August 2008 - 06:49 AM
QUOTE (LoveStoned @ Jul 26 2008, 03:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead?
She was trying to make up her mind!
There was a blonde at a stoplight and it said walk. She started walking and, when she was in the middle of the street, the sign turned to don't walk. So she stopped.
A blonde goes into a library and says, "Hello. I'm here to see the doctor."
The librarian replies, "This is a library."
So the blonde lowers her voice and says, "Oh sorry!" Then whispers, "I'm here to see the doctor."
She was trying to make up her mind!
There was a blonde at a stoplight and it said walk. She started walking and, when she was in the middle of the street, the sign turned to don't walk. So she stopped.
A blonde goes into a library and says, "Hello. I'm here to see the doctor."
The librarian replies, "This is a library."
So the blonde lowers her voice and says, "Oh sorry!" Then whispers, "I'm here to see the doctor."
HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOLOLOLOLOLOL.
#115
- Xoulone
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Posted 01 September 2008 - 10:27 AM
Why did the New Yorker sleep underneath an oil truck?
So he can wake up oily!
I LOLed so hard when I first heard it.
So he can wake up oily!
I LOLed so hard when I first heard it.
Xinair.NET ♥ 411 ♥ @Xoulone
#116
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Posted 01 September 2008 - 07:42 PM
A kid by chance peeps into his parents' bedroom & is shocked at what he sees...
he shouts at his mom:
"AND YOU SCOLD ME FOR JUST SUCKING MY THUMB!?!" >0<
he shouts at his mom:
"AND YOU SCOLD ME FOR JUST SUCKING MY THUMB!?!" >0<
#117
- Junjjang!
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Posted 09 September 2008 - 02:45 PM
A man walked into a bar.
Ouch.
Ouch.
#118
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Posted 22 September 2008 - 02:41 PM
QUOTE (LoveStoned @ Jul 26 2008, 10:50 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead?
She was trying to make up her mind!
There was a blonde at a stoplight and it said walk. She started walking and, when she was in the middle of the street, the sign turned to don't walk. So she stopped.
A blonde goes into a library and says, "Hello. I'm here to see the doctor."
The librarian replies, "This is a library."
So the blonde lowers her voice and says, "Oh sorry!" Then whispers, "I'm here to see the doctor."
She was trying to make up her mind!
There was a blonde at a stoplight and it said walk. She started walking and, when she was in the middle of the street, the sign turned to don't walk. So she stopped.
A blonde goes into a library and says, "Hello. I'm here to see the doctor."
The librarian replies, "This is a library."
So the blonde lowers her voice and says, "Oh sorry!" Then whispers, "I'm here to see the doctor."
hahaha i love blonde jokes XD
#119
- jc♥
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Posted 22 September 2008 - 03:44 PM
QUOTE (KTHubbybunch @ Sep 1 2008, 08:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A kid by chance peeps into his parents' bedroom & is shocked at what he sees...
he shouts at his mom:
"AND YOU SCOLD ME FOR JUST SUCKING MY THUMB!?!" >0<
he shouts at his mom:
"AND YOU SCOLD ME FOR JUST SUCKING MY THUMB!?!" >0<
LOL cuuuute
#120
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Posted 25 September 2008 - 08:27 AM
QUOTE (zZany @ Jun 12 2008, 04:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Geography or History?
Once some burglars broke out in the bank, one of them pointing the gun to the cashier said, "Give me all your money, or you'll be GEOGRAPHY!"
The cashier laughed and said, "You mean to say 'HISTORY.'"
The burglar answered, "Don't change the subject."
Once some burglars broke out in the bank, one of them pointing the gun to the cashier said, "Give me all your money, or you'll be GEOGRAPHY!"
The cashier laughed and said, "You mean to say 'HISTORY.'"
The burglar answered, "Don't change the subject."
Oh my gosh lol I really love that one!
