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Dog Named Sex

#1 User is offline   Supremacy 

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Posted 06 September 2008 - 11:31 AM


Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I would like to have one too!" Then I said, "But she is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. I said, "You don't understand. ... I have had Sex since I was nine years old." He replied, "You must have been quite a strong boy." When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I would like to have Sex at the wedding. He told me to wait until after the wedding was over. I said, "But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole world revolves around Sex." He said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church. I told him everyone would enjoy having Sex at the wedding. The next day we were married at the Justice of the Peace. My family was barred from the church from then on.

When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, I took the dog with me. When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the motel is a place for sex. I said, "You don't understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Me too!"

One day I entered Sex in a contest. But before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around. I told him that I was going to have Sex in the contest. He said that I should have sold my own tickets. "You don't understand," I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV." He called me a show off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married but Sex left me after I was married." The Judge said, "Same here!"

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking all over for her. A cop came over and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the morning. I said, "I'm looking for Sex." -- My case comes up next Thursday.

Well now I've been thrown in jail, been divorced and had more damn troubles with that dog than I ever foresaw. Why just the other day when I went for my first session with the psychiatrist, she asked me, "What seems to be the trouble?" I replied, "Sex has been my best friend all my life but now it has left me for ever. I can't live any longer being so lonely." and the doctor said, "Look mister, you should understand that sex isn't a man's best friend so go get yourself a dog."
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#2 User is offline   darkanqelxp 

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Posted 06 September 2008 - 11:36 AM

LOL - SEX screwed his life

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#3 User is offline   insanityy 

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Post icon  Posted 06 September 2008 - 11:39 AM

i think i got this in an email
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#4 User is offline   GongZhenPei 

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Posted 06 September 2008 - 01:11 PM

lol, why did he name his dog sex when he was nine? lol
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#5 User is offline   poohbear101 

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Posted 06 September 2008 - 01:41 PM

repost but seriously sex?
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#6 User is offline   vipjjang 

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Posted 06 September 2008 - 02:03 PM

puhahahha ..serves him right for naming the dog sex..
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#7 User is offline   I.like.foood 

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Posted 09 September 2008 - 02:45 AM

lol? ^o)
GG!

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#8 User is offline   yimee 

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Posted 09 September 2008 - 09:41 PM

Why name a dog sex?

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#9 User is offline   aznshorty 

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Posted 10 September 2008 - 03:25 PM

hahaha yea, this was posted b4. but it's really funny^^
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#10 User is offline   Smile~! 

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Posted 10 September 2008 - 03:29 PM

That's a long-living dog there.
To the world, you are but one person; but to one person, you are the world.
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#11 User is offline   k i m c h i * 

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Posted 10 September 2008 - 03:34 PM

ROFL!!! Funny! XDDD
Why didn't he just mention that it's his dog's name? Lmao.
But then again, that would ruin the humor. Muahahaha XDDDDDD
& I can feel you letting go.

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#12 User is offline   FrozenWaterMelon 

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Posted 10 September 2008 - 05:28 PM

haha i literally rofl. so funny hehe
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#13 User is offline   xblush 

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Posted 11 September 2008 - 10:14 PM

XDD yeahh repost.. but fun to read again XD.. hahaha..

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#14 User is offline   ChunnieBunnieLover 

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Posted 17 September 2008 - 06:15 AM

LOL.. poor dog, didn't got a real name..
this reminds me of Pink's dog.. i think she named her dog as "F***"
not so sure since it was bleep out on tv..ehehe
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#15 User is offline   suju_m 

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Posted 17 September 2008 - 06:17 AM

pwahhahhahahahahahaha!


soo funnyyy!! ahahahaha!!
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