[zaadee]

Hey Soompier

do you guys agree or disagree with this statement?

"A good relationship starts from a perfect friendship"

I personally agree because i want to get the know the person first as friends before i start a relationship.

But some ppl disagree with this statement because of the following or similar:

- You're too close of friends and you know TOO much about the person already, so no suprises, intensity or expectations
- Once you date and break up, you'll lose the good friendship
- You're so close to each other that you guys are like brothers and sisters

So each have their own pros and cons, so i was just wonder what do you guys think? agree or disagree?

And it would be great if some of u guys can share some of your stories about dating your close friends if it was successfull or not successfull

[soojinuhh]

i would agree.
you would already know some of his/her quirks, habits, blahblah.
& you cant possibly know a person too much.
he/she still has those DEEP DARK SECRETS.
& you would feel secured - cus he/she's your friend, & they prolly wont hurt you.

my friend's relationship with a best friend wasnt successful. they did last long though.
now theyre still bestfriends and sharing that sisterly-brotherly bond. (:

[msupky]

Agreed.

Friendship is like.. the base foundation of a relationship. Friendship is the time where you can get to know more about the other person and when you can decide whether or not you want to make more out of this friendship. And you'd understand each other more? The thing is.. when you start off with friendship and turn it into a relationship, you have a friend who also happens to be your significant other. But your significant other isn't always your friend? LOL There'd be less secrets and more bonding if it starts off as a friendship.

Annnnd I don't know. If you truly loved them (ie. friendship first), then the likelyhood of getting bored is minimal? It's like hanging out with a friend. You don't get bored of friends... : |

[rice_rice]

"A good relationship starts from a perfect friendship"

i wouldn't say you need to have a 'perfect' friendship to have a have a good relationship.
but i does come down to the individual. some people like knowing all about a person before starting a relationship with them, like knowing all their secrets, history, habits etc.
but some people, like me, only need to know what the person's personality is like, if you will be compatible or not, all the rest can be left till later.

to me the most important thing is to be able to talk to the person well, talking up a storm without awkwardness is the best indication.

personally, i have never fallen for any friends who i've had a very good friendship with. it's either i like them from the start as bf material or just as friends, and it will never change. unless that is i've known them for ages as acquaintances and haven't really gotten to know them.

i've only known my bf for about a month as friends before going out with him, and i don't think there's anything wrong with that at all.

[ShadowMax76]

agreed.

if you two weren't great friends. it'd be a rather shallow/misunderstood relationship
if you two weren't freidns in teh beginning.. it is really up to the flip of a coin.. so to say.

if you two were good friends. ....sometimes feelings can grow.
but really... there are those people who we TRY to make friends with, and we ONLY think of them as friends.

others we don't TRY. seems more easier to fall in love with...

..my weird thoughts. may not be true

[iya.donghae]

If it did, I would have had a different boyfriend, and I would still be with my ex-friends. We were best friends.


But nooooo.

[duykato]

I really like reading the replies to this topic.There's a quote I heard from somewhere that goes along the lines of "Marry your best friend and when the wind blows think of each other." I can't remember where I heard it from.

[-LitmusPaper]

I don't think it's really good. In a way.
If you know the guy too well, it's easier true.
But you can't start going around dating other guys that you don't know right? xD.
Having a close friend as a boyfriend is somewhat weird.
It's hard to become friends again.

-Jaejoongx3

[RawrRawr]

Interesting.

I agree... to a certain extent.



For me, there have been only two superclose guy friends that I have been interested in, out of maybe twenty guys I am "close" to.

Usually, I can "feel" whether or not a guy has the potential for me to be interested in him. It sounds weird, but after I hang out with a guy once I usually "know" whether or not I could ever like him.
With the guy right now I am interested in... we are REALLY close friends, it's a perfect friendship because we started off as church acquaintances. I know a lot about him, and vice versa, but we go out just as friends and stuff... but yeah, when I first met him, I didn't think I would be interested... but I sort of "knew" it was possible. I don't know how to explain it.

However, MOST guy friends that I'm close to are friend-zoned. When we talk past a certain point they are no longer "boys," but friends. &then I just can not see them as anything else.

ANDDD... most guys that I meet for the first time, I immediately know I could never be interested in them, and therefore I am willing to hang out with them more / be more open with them.



Weird, huh....

[lilliums]

but i does come down to the individual. some people like knowing all about a person before starting a relationship with them, like knowing all their secrets, history, habits etc.
but some people, like me, only need to know what the person's personality is like, if you will be compatible or not, all the rest can be left till later.

to me the most important thing is to be able to talk to the person well, talking up a storm without awkwardness is the best indication.

personally, i have never fallen for any friends who i've had a very good friendship with. it's either i like them from the start as bf material or just as friends, and it will never change. unless that is i've known them for ages as acquaintances and haven't really gotten to know them.

i've only known my bf for about a month as friends before going out with him, and i don't think there's anything wrong with that at all.

I'm exactly the same way. When I initially meet someone, I already know if he's boyfriend material or just a friend. I can't imagine ever going out with any of my guy friends, or any of the guys I work closely with at work. That's just the way I am.

[Apple.Mint]

i disagree
lol because i went through it
i dated one of my closest guy friend [big mistake, knew i should've said no]
we were really good friends and our relationship was the worst ever ._.
hahha Well
we've lost it out
I thought we could still be friends afterward
but no..his attitude..i can't take it
I gave everything back to him, we're done
we cant even be friends anymore =]

[Chanellas]

It wasn't so in my case.

I was never friends with him. We just kinda hit it off when we met over a card game. He asked me out after our 2nd/3rd time seeing each other. I thought, well, okay if we broke up.... nothing to lose right? LOL

We're still together as of today, 4 years later. =)

[gisbiz]

i have to disagree.
when i'm friends or become friends with the opposite gender, i cant help but view/accept him only as a brother.
it's an automatic turn-off, that's how my system works.

hahaha! i remember telling this guy once that i couldn't be his friend. he didn't understand why. LOL

[mz simmonz]

somewhat disagree. I think a really good friendship really does help with making a good relationship but its not guaranteed. for example I dated this guy that I was friends with for 6 years. We had a nice little relationship but the spark died out quick (half a year). The good thing is, there are no hard feelings between us, we're both still very respectful and fond of each other but not in the romantic way.

another example is my friend dating our other friend..he was immediately infatuated with her and she ended up liking him too so they dated and now it's been a year they can't stop fighting..the guy is totally dumbfounded because she was such a great friend but as a girl friend she was a different person; controlling, moody, clingly, etc.

I thnk it's only beneficial because it helps the feelings and trust grow before the dating process.

[MNLV27]

^^ i agree with you...

my bf and i started out as best friends and things just happened and we ended up dating, and now its a bit hard because his personality changed, it was different from when we were friends..he's become more moody and jealous easily and all that other stuff...

it is good to start as friends but that kind of makes you uncertain if you want to change the friendship...its like tossing a coin...dont know what will happen in the end...

[heheimawesome]

Wouldn't it be boring? You already know so much about them..
I like the excitement.

[I.♥_Y0U ;)]

I disagree, there's a lot more excitement when it's a new person.

[gisbiz]

Wouldn't it be boring? You already know so much about them..
I like the excitement.

I disagree, there's a lot more excitement when it's a new person.

i know...it's like, what's there left to know?

[elperro]

when a guy is my friend, i'll always see him as a friend... because if you become friends with him first and then end up being in a relationship with him, then wouldn't that mean your friendship stage was actualy the courting process? for me, if there wasn't an attraction to begin with, then there definitely won't be an attraction later on. my feelings are firm and decisive.

[LOVE&FREEDOM_beautyofX]

friends to a certain flirting extent, my current boyfriend, i've been going out with him for 14 months so far =) and at first we were mild friends but was flirting from the beginning lol and then we went out like 3 months later ^^ so yes, i agree.