[mikasaranghae]

There is a guy that I like (our first love is like puppy-love to me, sweet & memorable) . But due to my situation at the time, we just had to break up. I felt really bad about hurting him. After one year, my situation gets improved, I started to think about him so I contacted him, only to find out he got a girlfriend. I was really sad but I couldnot blame him but myself. I thought the situation is hopeless now, so I started dating someone else too. During this time, I felt he still likes me but I ignored it because we both have someone else.

Now he and that girl broke up. He is sad and seems to hope to get back with me. What an ironic fate. If I knew they would break up, I'd never date someone else. But everything is too late now. I am older now, I don't have much faith in puppy-love/first love/true love any more. To me, love is not really real; everyone can love anyone. Everyone can break up & move on to love someone else. It's all very boring to me. Nothing special, it's just like a dinner that you have to eat. I am thus very tired of loving too much and believeing in someone too much.

I don't know what I am asking. But just wonder what would you do in this case. Thank you.

[smpilova]

To me..
I think your doing okay...
because... I think i would do the same.

He just needs time to move on. give him time.

but.. you must've been really hurt to not "love" people and trusting them alot..

[mikasaranghae]

To me..
I think your doing okay...
because... I think i would do the same.

He just needs time to move on. give him time.

but.. you must've been really hurt to not "love" people and trusting them alot..

You're very correct. In the past I was very stupid. It's why I lost all faith in the word, "love". It's very meaningless to me. I just date someone now because we all have to move on, date then get married. It's like a duty that I have to do in life, nothing special to me.

[heheimawesome]

If it feels like a chore to be with the person you're with, why are you with them?
Sure, love has it's ups and downs. But you make it seem like it has no ups at all. Love is stronger than most people think. The toughest guy can be the wimpiest when it comes to the one he loves.

Break up with your boyfriend if you feel that way. Not saying to get back with your ex, but you shouldn't be dating anyone if thats how you feel. Just be single and go mingle. Someday someone will sweep you off your feet.
You loved him too much? You believed too much? If you loved him so much, then why didn't you communicate with him and try to get past the problem together?

p.s
You were hurt alot thats why you're not going to trust or love anyone? You're the one who broke up with him. Did you expect him to wait for your situation to improve? Think about what YOU must have done to HIM.

One year and he got another girlfriend. One whole year. You don't know what he could've been through in that one year because of you. For all you know he waited 6 months hoping hoping hoping you'd get back with him. And finally he gave up. I hope this is a slap in the face for you. Wake up from your emo-ness and start taking chances again.

And one more thing. He and that girl broke up, and he still wants to get back with you. After one whole year. What does this tell you? He probably loved you way more than you ever loved him. (assuming hes the one that dumped her. If she dumped him then I don't know. Maybe he wants to use you as a rebound or he actually had a thing for you the whole time.)Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

[mikasaranghae]

If it feels like a chore to be with the person you're with, why are you with them?
Sure, love has it's ups and downs. But you make it seem like it has no ups at all. Love is stronger than most people think. The toughest guy can be the wimpiest when it comes to the one he loves.

Break up with your boyfriend if you feel that way. Not saying to get back with your ex, but you shouldn't be dating anyone if thats how you feel. Just be single and go mingle. Someday someone will sweep you off your feet.
You loved him too much? You believed too much? If you loved him so much, then why didn't you communicate with him and try to get past the problem together?

p.s
You were hurt alot thats why you're not going to trust or love anyone? You're the one who broke up with him. Did you expect him to wait for your situation to improve? Think about what YOU must have done to HIM.

One year and he got another girlfriend. One whole year. You don't know what he could've been through in that one year because of you. For all you know he waited 6 months hoping hoping hoping you'd get back with him. And finally he gave up. I hope this is a slap in the face for you. Wake up from your emo-ness and start taking chances again.

And one more thing. He and that girl broke up, and he still wants to get back with you. After one whole year. What does this tell you? He probably loved you way more than you ever loved him. (assuming hes the one that dumped her. If she dumped him then I don't know. Maybe he wants to use you as a rebound or he actually had a thing for you the whole time.)Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

I respect you opinion. I think there is something really "wrong" with me. I can't really love anyone any more. Dating is just like a duty to me, to get married in the future. My parents say, after marriage no one really is in love with anyone, it's just a matter of "family" & "companion", the love feeling is lost with reality. I guess, their words keep staying in my mind, making me feel everything is nothing but a matter of life/responsibility...that's all. You know what I mean?


Thank you though. Your analysis is really good. He still loves me but there is nothing I can do for him; I don't feel the same way at all, I don't feel love like the way it should be any more.