[twinky3004]

So as the title implies, I'm caught between my ex and this new guy I met.

A little background info: my ex and I were together for about three and a half years, but our relationship ended really badly. We haven't seen/spoken to each other for about two months. I've heard a lot of sh*t about him after our breakup that should make me hate him, but it actually makes me sad, which leads to me missing him more. Our relationship, for the most part, was good. We loved each other, were always together, etc. He was the one constant in my life, I poured everything I had into the relationship, and it was reciprocated. But our biggest problem was trust. He lied compulsively and would tell his friends to lie for him, but I told myself that I would rather be with him (lying and all) than be without him. But one day I had had enough and broke it off. Since that day we've talked once or twice, and I said things that I regret, but it was all out of anger. But now, hes apparently moved on and it breaks my heart.

Moving on, so I met this new guy a couple weeks ago. He's cute, funny, smart, pretty much everything a girl could ask for. We have a lot in common and all my friends are telling me to go for it. At first, I could honestly say that he made me forget about my ex and I was totally crazy over this guy. But I found myself thinking more and more about my ex. I told myself that if he could move on, so could I. But... I really cant. Yesterday was his (ex) birthday and I text him saying happy birthday, but never got a response back. And the day before that would have been our anniversary. I don't know what it is, but its been two months and I'm still not over him.

I really dont know what to do. If this new guy were to ask me out, I dont think I could say yes because I know I'm not completely over my ex and I would feel as if I were lying to him and thats no way to start a relationship. So what should I do? There's this perfect guy that likes me, but I just can't get over my ex who doesnt even want to see/talk to me ever again... Any advice is welcome. Thanks in advance.

[chuchow!]

i think the new guy would appreciate it if you were truthful and didn't date him just because.
IMO, you shouldn't get into a relationship with another guy in the back of your mind. it'll hurt you and the new guy.
just wait it out. if he is as perfect as you say he is, he'll wait for you too =)

[GreenStuff]

Its good to try giving the new guy a chance not just because you wanna move on but only if you like him. If you dont like him than No. Bout the Old guy It really is going to take a long time for you to move on, but we all gotta get use to it. When I broke up with my long time bf it took me over a year to get over it without dating/talking with any guy. But in the end I was so proud of myself that I made it through. And sometimes dating a new guy could make things worse. And sometimes we can't get over our ex because we dont want to. We say we Do but Deeply we dont want to bc its like a betrayal to ourself to do that because we Love that person and have told ouself that we will always love this person no matter what. And it really is the thought of being with that person that makes us stay.

[The Fey]

remember: he is an ex for a reason

[taeee]

I think 2 months is understandable... i mean, you've been together for 3.5 years and to get over the guy, even though you guys ended badly, within 2 months would be...pretty quick. At least thats what i think.

*sigh* it's been a week since i've broken up...sucks goondeng right now...

[vickstahs]

you're clearly not emotionally ready to move on yet; i don't think you should jump into anything new quite just yet. this is only to assure that you don't hurt him adn yourself in the process, you know?
just take things as slowly as you can; and if the new guy does ask you out, explain to him your situation. if he was that keen, he would understand and be willing to wait for you.

[mintcracker]

hey your relationship was 3 and a half years...I would expect you to take at least half a year to let go completely.
Don't fret >_<, it takes alot more time I think, but eventually you'll let go.

[GOOMBA]

Don't date the new guy to get over your ex. That'd be rebounding, and that would hurt one of you

As for the ex, keep yourself occupied. He doesn't sound like somebody worth crying/moping over

[sus]

hmm 2 months isnt a very long time... for a 3+ year relationship...

hmm if ur not readi then dont go out with ne one...

if u like him continue to get to know him
and if he likes u bak

tell him ur situation n if he liked u enough he will wait for u

just become close friends n when ur readi... things will naturalii progress

dont force urself when ur not readi ...

[MaryMagdalin]

why not date him opposed to going out with him?
explain to him your situation
i`m sure he`ll understand

i had a similar situation
except he wasnt um... PERFECT... no one is.
but we both just got out of a serious relationship
i was butt hurt and he was just sad he hurt his ex.
we just dated for a long time before he asked me out =)