[m3chen]

Note:
I guess soompi really is a place for the yougins . . . I looked at a few random people's profiles and they are 15 and 16 and damn that made me feel ancient XD~ BTW I am by no means old, however I am old in comparison to them!

Anyways I saw this post about being single and I wanted to post there but the fact that the person who started the post was one of those youngins I was talking about stopped me for doing so ㅠ_ㅠ. So I thought it'd be better to make a separate post here in the 20+ forum. I'll do it in question format so others can do it too!

How long have you been single for?
About 2 years now.

Any reasons or history for why?
Well.... its a super long story. It felt like I was in a drama and it just happened to me, kind of like I was watching it. Even thinking back, it still feels surreal. Here's my story:

So once upon a time, I dated a Korean girl. She liked me first and kind of got me to notice her by doing silly, but memorable things. We started dating and things were pretty great, we did a lot of things together and spent a ton of time talking getting to know each other (it felt like we were both dating for the first time). However before I met her, I had promised my father that I would go on a volunteer english teaching program in Taiwan for about 1 and half months (which was scheduled to happen in the summer). We had already dated for about 3-4 months at that point and although we had fought about my volunteer work, she understood that I couldn't just drop it because of my promise to my father. It was at that time she told me her visa was going to expire but she was going to get it extended for another year so that she could be there for me when I got back and spend as much time as humanly possible with me. This made me feel like a million bucks and with that feeling I left to go on my trip to Taiwan. While I was there, we spoke on the phone every couple of days and wrote emails to each other and things seemed going well. Then in the 4th week, she gave me a call that sounded like she was kind of sad and wanted to tell me something but couldn�t. At the time I had no idea of what was going on back home, so I asked my best friend to and check on her to see what was wrong. That�s when things got crazy . . . . Anyways I have cut this part short because I can't write it all out (just something I can't do)�Something happened and it traumatized her. She suffered a lot mentally because of the event and although her & my friends were there to help, she needed to go be with her family and left to go back to Korea, where she had to be hospitalized for a while. I didn't find out about this till about a week after she had left and I only found out because I forced it out my best friend. He had promised her that he wouldn't tell me until I got back because she didn't want me to worry about it on my trip. She knew that if I had found out, I would ended my trip and gone back to be with her. I kind of went nuts when I found out and wanted to leave immediately, but my uncle and friends in Taiwan stopped me and they all told me the same thing; that if she was already gone ending my trip wasn't going to make her come back and that I should finish my work. Anyways there is more to the story, but I think you get the general idea of why I stopped dating for a while, I was kind of hurt and had to take time to recover from what happened. These days I still look back with mixed feelings about what happened, but overall. . . I don't regret dating her. It was just something that happened and it wasn�t her fault.

Do you enjoy being single?
To be honest: no. I like the freedom and enjoy being able to spend my money all on myself (I like to be a little selfish sometimes). However if someone were to ask me if I would give up all my freedom for a relationship, I would have to say, depends on the girl. I�ve met some girls and some of them really don�t want a boyfriend, they want an ATM machine or a model for a boyfriend. That makes me sad, but oh well, I'm sure there are other's out there who aren't like that.

Thanks for reading my post, its kind of a rant really but... I just wanted get it out of my system.

[motheritried]

I'm 20 and I have never had a boyfriend in my life, and I don't think there will be one any time soon. I'm definitely not bad to look at, and I would even go as far to say that I'm a catch hahaha. But I APPEAR stuck up, so it never happens. Ehhh...

[addicted2kdrama]

How long have you been single for?
4 years or so

Any reasons or history for why?
I tell myself and everyone else I'm waiting for the right girl to come along. However, I think I'm just scared of getting into one.

Do you enjoy being single?
Most of the times, Yes. Only when I see couples being really happy, I get jealous. And at times it gets lonely too.

[DarkWaltz]

How long have you been single for?
2 weeks

Any reasons or history for why?
she wasn't the right girl for me, and the relationship was too short.

Do you enjoy being single?
A lot. More time for myself, less money to spend, can fool around and no strings attached. But that's because I haven't met the right one yet. Dunno if I'll ever.

[YellowBun]

what i feel is similar to ^ so ill just change it up a bit

How long have you been single for?
1yr if you count that...

Any reasons or history for why?
she wasn't the right girl for me, and the relationship was too short.

Do you enjoy being single?
A lot. More time for myself, more money to spend, can fool around and no strings attached. But that's because I haven't met the right one yet. Dunno if I'll ever. I feel like I need one right now.. not at all

[minie]

How long have you been single for?

Hmm, I haven't had a serious (non coffee) date in six months so I guess six months. But I also have never truly being in love or a serious (longer than a month) relationship so...

Any reasons or history for why?

When asked I would say because I want to focus on my career and that's mostly true b/c I work 70+ hour weeks and travel often but part of the issue is my fear. I've broken up with many great guys in fear that it wouldn't workout or me getting hurt. Although I realize what I am doing, I can't seem to stop this behavior. I guess I need to find someone who will provide me with the courage to risk it all and let myself go. Maybe my issue is waiting for someone to fix me rather than me trying to fix myself.... I'm ranting now; sorry.

Do you enjoy being single?

I do and don't. I love being able to decide what I want to do without needing to be mindful of a significant other, love not feeling guilty when I can't go to dinners or movies or dates, and I love spending the few hours of downtime that I have to myself. What I don't like is not having someone there for me; when I'm sick I can't call a bf to bring me congee, when I'm down I can't call a bf to cheer me up, when I oversleep I don't have a bf to call my cell to wake me up, when I forget to eat lunch or dinner I don't have a bf to remind me... most importantly I miss having someone just sitting next to me when I watch tv. I know it's random but I love/miss times when I would be watching tv and a bf would be work or vice versa; we're not talking to each other but it's nice to know you're not alone in an empty apartment... it has been too long since someone has 'taken care' of me but I guess I have been able to manage on my own.

[aurican]

How long have you been single for?
about 1 year+ now.

Any reasons or history for why?
Just wasn't meant to be.

Do you enjoy being single?
Yup. More freedom and nothing is holding me back. I can go and do whatever I want. In the future, unless there is someone that stands out to me, I think remaining single for me would be better.

[tasha8]

m3chen<3<3<3<3<3 <3 you sound sad, cheer up <3<3<3 (go drink some soju )

How long have you been single for?
About ...1 month.

Any reasons or history for why?
Fell for the wrong guy. again.

Do you enjoy being single?
Yes because I'm taking a breakkkkkkkkk from aaaaaaaaaaaaaaall this shiiiiat! lol.

[caramel.coffee&nuts]

How long have you been single for?
1 � year now.

Any reasons or history for why?
He wasn't the right guy for me.

Do you enjoy being single?
Yes, I really do, but there are times when I feel lonely & want someone especially when I see couples. But you know, the right guy for me will come when it's time so for now, I'll enjoy my freedom while I still can.

[angelZ]

How long have you been single for?
2 months

Any reasons or history for why?
Too many problems and we both knew the relationship wouldn't work out

Do you enjoy being single?
For the moment yes, because I need my own space and I don't have to worry about so much stuff. But sometimes I do miss having someone there for me...

[Annabear]

How long have you been single for?
3-4 months now, gosh it feels longer

Any reasons or history for why?
I was engaged to him for 7 months. It ended because, thinking back now, I was stupid enough to even say yes to marrying him in the first place. While I loved him, there were moments when I thought I shouldnt even be in this relationship and it took me a while to say it out loud to myself and everyone else that it should end.

Do you enjoy being single?
After that relationship, hell yeah! I hope that was a massive learning curve for me. It was such a whirlwind. I definitely need to be on my own right now and it just feels so liberating knowing that I can be happy without a special someone and at times, i feel like im doomed to be alone forever and at this point, that doesnt bother me one bit (give it a year or 5 ). Although im super excited at the prospects of meeting someone special in the VERY FAR future and hopefully this time, it will be an enjoyable one and not burdening.

[Pogichinoy]

Cheer up dude. It's unfortunate that it ended that way with this girl. But things happen for a reason. Look to the future and let yourself be open to all the other girls out there. You'll find your princess.

[questions987]

How long have you been single for?
6 years

Any reasons or history for why?
Long story, some know it - basically I was engaged. Things went wrong and I lost it. It's taken me 4 years to get over it and the last 2 years I've thrown myself into work/school because I fear a repeat relationship.

Do you enjoy being single?
For a long time I loved being single, 2 or 3 years I thought it was the best thing ever but I've become lonely recently and want to get involved again but haven't met anyone worth dating.

[derrek]

How long have you been single for?

1 and 1/2 years?

Any reasons or history for why?

It was the only girl I have ever dated, and we dated for over 2 years. I wouldn't take anything back, but we parted ways on mutual agreement that we weren't in the position to be in a relationship. She moved to Japan, and was originally from North Carolina, and I'm from Canada. Long distance is certainly possible, but it wears on me.

Do you enjoy being single?

I enjoy being single, but am willing to embrace the right relationship at any time. I'm very picky, and I know what I want, so if it comes up I'm certainly not going to turn it down. I think finding the right girl will be wonderful, and will keep me grounded. I look forward to it, but have no expectations.

[JDM6]

How long have you been single for?
2 years and some months

Any reasons or history for why?
At first she wanted her space to accomplish a few things personally. I disagreed, but was she was not going to have it any other way. I let her have it and remained very supportive. We considered ourselves single then. She started hanging out with some guy very often, eventually dating him. I was a little furious about it. She totally contradicted herself about wanting space and then dated someone else witin two months. She then tells me she doesn't want to be with me anymore because we've grown apart and that her new man has more values in common with her than I do. She got pregnant with him. She tells me to move on and that we're done but wants to keep in contact. I asked why did she do all of this after all that we've been through? She said I deserved someone better than her. She said her burdens kept me from reaching my full potential. After 6 years she realized it?? She says she did all those things to make sure she couldn't forgive herself to come back to me and that I would not take her back becasue of it. It worked.

I tried to keep it short so I did leave a few things out if it doesn't make much sense. sorry...

Do you enjoy being single?
Yes, because I'm able to get up and do or go as I please when ever and where ever. My time is spent on myself and no one else.
No, because all my friends are either married, or in a serious relationship. I'm usually the third wheel, or the single guy in the group. Although we're hanging out as a group, I somehow feel left out in a strange way. I also miss the feeling of having that connection with someone.

[7thprincess]

How long?

A loong time!

Reasons why?

Because I want to be single. Though I did like this one guy, but he had wayy too much baggage. After thinking about it, I'm glad we are just friends.

Do I enjoy being single?

YES! OF COURSE! I am loving every moment of it!

[k1D3Ck]

I'm 20 and I have never had a boyfriend in my life, and I don't think there will be one any time soon. I'm definitely not bad to look at, and I would even go as far to say that I'm a catch hahaha. But I APPEAR stuck up, so it never happens. Ehhh...

Hello! haha...you should like my type!

Anyway, been single for almost 23 years now. Never found someone due to mostly location issues, plus be unreal according to my friends. Probably will change sometime soon. I have a career, but not a whole lot of time to go looking around. I am told to stop looking, and that is when it happens.

[derrek]

I am told to stop looking, and that is when it happens.

Probably the same people that say "It's always in the last place you look!"... of course it's in the last place you look, you STOP looking when you find it!!

... sigh, some people!

[Raito!]

How long have you been single for?
22 years!!!! I BEAT YOU GUYS!!!!!OH YAA!!!!! T___T i feel happy and sad at the same time.
Just realize the posted above beat me by one!!! now i feel sad. arigatou!!!!

Any reasons or history for why?
perhaps its bc i dont look my age? girls my age said im 18 and girls 6yrs older than me said im 15 O__O perhaps they think im immature T__T

Do you enjoy being single?
no way but on the other hand, it does save money which i dont have enough off.

[xxcody]

OOO a contest. 29 years and no GF. yay!

Reasons might be because like the above I do look much younger than I really am. And I've heard girls like the guy to look older =P yeah that's my excuse. Combine that with nice guy syndrome + shyness factor and you've got a winner.

The single life is kool and all. I now mostly use it as excuse to improve myself. Learn a new language. Always wanted to be able to play the piano. Lift some weights. Go volunteering. etc.

Although it would be nice to see what a relationship is like so then at least I can say. " I choose to be single". or "I choose to in a relationship". I mean, I can't even make a comparison.