[k1D3Ck]

You can tell her to stop doing that because it's annoying. And no one likes to be compared to anyone. Thats what makes us human beings different.

[melkimx]

So, i take it there's no real good way to make her stop doing this?
Is there anything i can say to her to make her stop it?

what have you done to try? making jokes about it doesn't count... if she really is this inconsiderate, humor would probably be too subtle. if you have a serious talk with her just once, it shouldn't be too hard to convince her that these aren't things you ever say to people you respect. but if the problem is that she doesn't respect you, then... oh well.

you'd be so annoying yet fun to talk to. how come i only attract the boring submissive girls.

hah... i like to think i'm not overly annoying unless someone has already been that appallingly rude in the first place. i could be so wrong, though.

[Aziraphale]

EDIT:

So, i take it there's no real good way to make her stop doing this?
Is there anything i can say to her to make her stop it?

Err... tit for tat? She mentions her exes, you mention yours (or cook up some, whatever). If she still doesn't get it... wow, then she is VERY dense and rude.

[Tuffcore]

Err... tit for tat? She mentions her exes, you mention yours (or cook up some, whatever). If she still doesn't get it... wow, then she is VERY dense and rude.

Absolutely no way. Just because she was rude to me, i'm not going to be rude to her. I refuse to sink down to someone's level just to prove a point. I'm insulted by this girl but i'm still a man of integrity and principle.

Any other suggestions?

what have you done to try? making jokes about it doesn't count... if she really is this inconsiderate, humor would probably be too subtle. if you have a serious talk with her just once, it shouldn't be too hard to convince her that these aren't things you ever say to people you respect. but if the problem is that she doesn't respect you, then... oh well.

i've only tried humor.
I think i know what i need to say but it's just so hard to say it...

[Aziraphale]

Absolutely no way. Just because she was rude to me, i'm not going to be rude to her. I refuse to sink down to someone's level just to prove a point. I'm insulted by this girl but i'm still a man of integrity and principle.

Well, yeah, it's not really going anywhere, is it? Why don't you just tell her outright you don't like it? If you've tried so many ways and she still doesn't get it, well maybe just telling it straight might actually save you a lot of grief.

[incyphe]

Well, yeah, it's not really going anywhere, is it? Why don't you just tell her outright you don't like it? If you've tried so many ways and she still doesn't get it, well maybe just telling it straight might actually save you a lot of grief.

Yeah I agree. Yeah it sounds like you'll have to let her know verbally.

My face usually reacts immediately to annoying comments, so people usually know I'm ticked. You must be a lot more mature than I am. lol

Hrm...

Well, I would use the following opening line...

"I'm really glad that you're open about how you feel, and letting me know what you want. But _____________________________"

Maybe experts here can fill in the blank.

[CIRee]

"I'm really glad that you're open about how you feel, and letting me know what you want. But _____________________________"

Maybe experts here can fill in the blank.

I'm not like your other ex-boyfriends, thats why you are with me and not with them.

Tuffcore: Never fight fire with fire. If she keep bring it up here a few come backs.(of course this should be in a playful manner).
"remind me why are we together, again?"
"give me his number so I can call him"
"aww baby going go throw a fit, if she doesn't get what she wants."
"would you like a 2nd boyfriend?"

[hangook/korea]

I'm not like your other ex-boyfriends, thats why you are with me and not with them.

Tuffcore: Never fight fire with fire. If she keep bring it up here a few come backs.(of course this should be in a playful manner).
"remind me why are we together, again?"
"give me his number so I can call him"
"aww baby going go throw a fit, if she doesn't get what she wants."
"would you like a 2nd boyfriend?"

I would have put up with that kind of behavior a few years ago, but now it's a different story. I mean I'd give the girl a chance, I suppose, but that is a turn off. I have enough drama and stress in life, I don't need anymore coming from a girlfriend.

[thealmightyGOD]

maybe you can solve it with giving her too much of what she wants? like sweet talking her until she gets annoyed. but then she might actually like that, i don't know.

or get her ex's number and whenever she mentions him, call him up in front of her and hand her the phone. LAWLZ. but then that might not be good either. i blow at this.

[donporkuloin]

Just be blunt, and tell her not to compare with her ex's. I like what JJM said. Ok, you can have integrity by not sinking to her level, etc. However, by just joking it off you're not setting any ground for it. You're just sending the message that it's ok for her to do that.

[JJM]

maybe you can solve it with giving her too much of what she wants? like sweet talking her until she gets annoyed. but then she might actually like that, i don't know.

or get her ex's number and whenever she mentions him, call him up in front of her and hand her the phone. LAWLZ. but then that might not be good either. i blow at this.

The ol' reversed pyschology move, eh? It works every now and then.

My last serious relationship, I dated this guy whom I can now consider in the category of "I did ugly". My bf reminds me from time to time that my ex is butt fugly and I agree. He'd get a wee bit ticked b/c it doesn't affect me at all. But when it comes to his ex (of whom I think she is unattractive and looks like a feminine dude), I basically tell him she's plain fugly. So, we decided to put our exes' pics on "hot or not" for 48 hrs. Turned out the masses thought my ex was better looking than his. His ex averaged out to be a 5 and mine a 7. The silly crap we do.

IMO, what made/makes the exes ugly is simply the fact that they cheated.

[rahrah]

EDIT:

So, i take it there's no real good way to make her stop doing this?
Is there anything i can say to her to make her stop it?

threaten to break up with her. if you can't do that, she doesn't view you as a man anyways.

set it up slowly, start talking to other girls, maybe about your problems.

start getting backups.

then tell her you're sick of her saying xxxx, and you will break up with her if she doesn't stop.

if you are too weak to do that, then thats how the rest of your relationships in life will probably be like...

this is an unlucky curse (sometimes) of having or being with baggage.

personaly, i would never talk abotu an ex to a gf. that is just plain rude and insensitive. why not just make her watch a porno of you and your ex then? what a stupid thing to do. the girl u describe actually sounds like one of those weird types that might actually enjoy watching a porno of her bf and her bf's ex.

guy: my ex used to make dinner for me from time to time. i love when girls cook and i wish you could do the same for me.
me: that's nice. have you ever cooked for me? no, right? you know i don't like to cook. so why don't you go back to your ex who makes dinner for you,

thats just rude too. wtf?

a guy should know that its crucial for him to cook for a girl in the middle of the courting ---> together stage. it sets him up for her to think of him in a long term kind of way (yeah i can cook for him too).

but mentioning an ex to get what they want... these are some stupid people.

[badboy yardy]

tuffcore, you can't let this girl do that. seriously, it's one of the most annoying things a girl can do to a guy she's dating.

this happened to me when I first started dating my gf. i let it slide for a few months, but after a stressful day at work i pretty much flipped the switch and told her something to the extent of...

"can you please stop f'ing comparing to your ex, it's so f'ing annoying. if you keep talking about the f'er, get a f'ing flight ticket and go back to china."

and then i ranted for another half hour. it felt so cathartic. i made it be known how much i hated being compared to her ex.

after that flip, she never talks to me about her ex. i thought she could've ended our relationship then and there, because i literally let out the mother of all tirades, but we've been together for almost two years now.

[donporkuloin]

For those in relationships, how did you meet your s/o?

[kuli]

Tuffcore just ask her why it ended. Not to be mean but just out of curiosity, if I kept talking about my ex who treated me that nicely then I'd honestly still be with him

[JF21©]

..it just came to me (regarding Tuffcore's girlfriend's diarrhea of the mouth)..maybe she's tryna tell you something...like she could be purposely comparing you outloud and to your face so that you do break up with her..that way she doesn't have to break up with you....like i mean c'mon how dense does this girl have to be if you've told her in passing that you don't like it and she keeps doing it...i think she's tryna send u a message...but in the most childish of ways.

she may have just iono ran into her ex and started thinking about him again and wants to try to get back with him..but can't cuz she's with you..so she's finding fault in the things you do--and telling you about them--so she can either justify breaking up with you or make you break up with her...

my brother's girlfriend used to do things like that (not the comparing) but she'd ''act out'' so that my brother would want to break up with her...

iono..it's just a possibility...
'

[CIRee]

^^wow thats an interesting point. I would never thought of that, hell I bet all the guys are as clueless as me.

[Tuffcore]

..it just came to me (regarding Tuffcore's girlfriend's diarrhea of the mouth)..maybe she's tryna tell you something...like she could be purposely comparing you outloud and to your face so that you do break up with her..that way she doesn't have to break up with you....like i mean c'mon how dense does this girl have to be if you've told her in passing that you don't like it and she keeps doing it...i think she's tryna send u a message...but in the most childish of ways.

she may have just iono ran into her ex and started thinking about him again and wants to try to get back with him..but can't cuz she's with you..so she's finding fault in the things you do--and telling you about them--so she can either justify breaking up with you or make you break up with her...

my brother's girlfriend used to do things like that (not the comparing) but she'd ''act out'' so that my brother would want to break up with her...

iono..it's just a possibility...
'

Wow, I never thought of it that way. This girl has shown moments of immaturity so what you've said is not entirely impossible although she has stopped with the comparisons in the last little while. A little update on us:

We were doing quite well for a week but then Tuesday happened. She tried to either angle me into verbal commitment or somehow extract out of me her importance in my life moving forward. I spoke cautiously optimistic about my future trying my best to not overpromise her too much and under-deliver in the end. In reaction to me holding back my unconditional love for her, she pulled a, "do you think we should still see each?" She went on to push our relationship to the brink of break-up by suggesting that she can never be in a long term relationship and that it's probably better to end things now than later. She says she's scared of commitment. She says she has a habit of breaking up with a guy before the guy breaks up with her.

It was one eventful evening and silly me, I took her quite seriously too. Wednesday (yesterday) wasn't without heartache either. I called her up and played it like Tuesday never happened although she eventually did speak very remorsely about the things she said. She tried to take a lot of it back while i tried to avoid the subject altogether. Things looked good and i thought we could put Tuesday behind us.

Then a call came at around 10:40pm. We were about to head over to my place to spend the night (which we've been doing with frequency) when suddenly we were interrupted by a call on her cell phone. After a short talk on her phone, she mentioned to me that she had 9:30pm plans with some guy who was going to hire her for work. She said they were going to play pool. I reluctantly agreed that she should go in suspicion of that guy's intentions but did agree in the end insisting that we call each other before we sleep.

So, 1am comes around and she did call. Ends up, they went for drinks at a pub instead of pool and somehow ended up at some warehouse where she did some weed with the guy. She told me over the phone that she was so proud she only had one drag of weed and boasted on her high level of self-control. I was absolutely distraught but didn't show it.

So this is the morning after. I must say, i appreciate her honesty with me (assuming she was completely honest). I must also say, she's not girlfriend material. When she drinks, she loses control and can do anything with anybody (...even sex. i know too well from experience).

[thealmightyGOD]

She told me over the phone that she was so proud she only had one drag

I don't know why, but I found that funny.

If I were you, I'd just end it with her and find someone else, unless you're in it for the sex. I doubt it's good enough to be worth the headaches and heartaches anyways.

[melkimx]

So, 1am comes around and she did call. Ends up, they went for drinks at a pub instead of pool and somehow ended up at some warehouse where she did some weed with the guy. She told me over the phone that she was so proud she only had one drag of weed and boasted on her high level of self-control. I was absolutely distraught but didn't show it.

So this is the morning after. I must say, i appreciate her honesty with me (assuming she was completely honest). I must also say, she's not girlfriend material. When she drinks, she loses control and can do anything with anybody (...even sex. i know too well from experience).

she went to drink and do weed at a warehouse with a guy who's going to interview her... what the heck kind of job would this be for? and how is one drag of weed showing a high level of self-control? now she just sounds totally sketchy. and idk what you're referring to in the last sentence, but it strikes me as pretty one-sided. you're right that she sure doesn't sound like gf material, but as far as doing anything with anybody goes... you also saw fit to enter a certain type of relationship with someone you don't even like that much. i'm not trying to chastise you, but it seems a bit of a stretch that you should be so judgmental.

and i didn't think of it before, but juicyfruit21 is probably right. she may not value your company that much if she can say all those things to you. either that, or she's horribly clueless about people's feelings.