[Tuffcore]

Please try to understand and no bashing.

So when is he scheduled to come back? Soon I hope?

Brian sounds like a genuine stand-up guy from what I can tell. He is in Iraq defending his country and may not return alive. He's doing the honorable thing by letting go of the woman he loves so she can find someone else to take care of her while he can't or may never be able to. Brian seems like the true definition of generous.

Brian also loves you immensely from what i can tell. If he was selfish, he would keep you waiting for him while you never know when he'll return, if even. Moreover, you're an adult and it's understandable that you need/want sex. It's human basics and he seems to be the type of guy who will be happy for you as long as you had a good time (I know it's hard to believe and I can't explain it but he just seems to be one of those guys.)

You said you will regret 5-10 years into marriage if Brian is the only man you've ever been intimate with, then think about being in regret 5-10 years into marriage with a secret haunting your marriage. What if that other marine somehow finds a way back into your life 5-10 years into your marriage with Brian? Think of the other side of the coin.

I say there's only one question that needs to be answered, "does Brian still love you a lot?" If so, be honest with him and even tell him everything you've told us here. You'll be surprised because he may totally understand your situation and won't feel hurt about you "hooking up" with another guy.

One advice though, maybe wait until Brian returns from Iraq to come clean so to avoid throwing Brian off focus on duty.

[kkkkk]

When a girl asks outright, "do you like me", does it mean she is somewhat interested? This is translated into english from cantonese, i guess this sentence is insinuating "are you interested in me".

Said girl also asks for help at all the randomest times. Things that a girl would typically ask a special other. (Such as cockroach appearing at the middle of the night.)

What puzzles me is that while there are late night phone calls, she sometimes would appear offline/block me on msn. My friends have interpreted this as her playing 'hard to get'. But i can't be certain.

What do you guys (actually i'd like to see some replies from girls) think?

[chibiskuld]

^
yep, i would say so ....

[flyhighkrngurl86]

Hello, I don't know if this is the right place to post, but here's my problem.
This happened a few years ago while i was still in high school. I'm a senior in college now.
I was a cheerleader starting from my sophomore year in high school and i had a huge crush on my player my sophomore year.
He found out so he decided to ignore and avoid me for the whole year.
Then the following two years, junior and senior year, he stared at me without saying a WORD to me.
I still don't know the reason why he stared at me.
Can anyone tell me what the reason he stared at me for might be?

[penawar]

What puzzles me is that while there are late night phone calls, she sometimes would appear offline/block me on msn. My friends have interpreted this as her playing 'hard to get'. But i can't be certain.

What do you guys (actually i'd like to see some replies from girls) think?

i will ask a guy whether he likes me or not in 2 situations..
-i am interested in him but afraid that he doesnt feel the same for me..so,just asking for some sense of security..
-i like him as a friend and afraid that he might fall for me..

um..but late night phone calls mean something more than friendship..that's my POV s a girl..

u should ask her for confirmation if u like her..or might just miss the chance..

Hello, I don't know if this is the right place to post, but here's my problem.
This happened a few years ago while i was still in high school. I'm a senior in college now.
I was a cheerleader starting from my sophomore year in high school and i had a huge crush on my player my sophomore year.
He found out so he decided to ignore and avoid me for the whole year.
Then the following two years, junior and senior year, he stared at me without saying a WORD to me.
I still don't know the reason why he stared at me.
Can anyone tell me what the reason he stared at me for might be?

hows his expression while staring at u?that could make a big difference..

was he smiling? or he look angry?

[flyhighkrngurl86]

i will ask a guy whether he likes me or not in 2 situations..
-i am interested in him but afraid that he doesnt feel the same for me..so,just asking for some sense of security..
-i like him as a friend and afraid that he might fall for me..

um..but late night phone calls mean something more than friendship..that's my POV s a girl..

u should ask her for confirmation if u like her..or might just miss the chance..




hows his expression while staring at u?that could make a big difference..

was he smiling? or he look angry?

he would stare at me while he's playing on the field so he had a helmet on. i couldn't see if he was smiling or not, but i know he wasn't angry.

[kkkkk]

i will ask a guy whether he likes me or not in 2 situations..
-i am interested in him but afraid that he doesnt feel the same for me..so,just asking for some sense of security..
-i like him as a friend and afraid that he might fall for me..

um..but late night phone calls mean something more than friendship..that's my POV s a girl..

u should ask her for confirmation if u like her..or might just miss the chance..

I was about to "go for it" these few days. But she is so cold and distant right now, its not funny. I definitely wouldnt try now.

I'm not the pushy kind of person. After she didn't pick up my call today, i didn't try to get her again. And then later on msn, she didn't really talk. I don't want to ask directly in case she doesnt feel the same. If she is indeed trying the "play hard to get" method, its failing, because its driving me nuts (and away).

Argh! Girls!

[[HyuNi]]

To be honest, I don't think she's playing hard to get...
I think you were a chase, she caught up to you, and now she's bored.

Let me guess, she's really cutsey to guys, she's a fashionista, she's in relatively good shape without working out, and she probably doesn't have long lasting friends, much less boyfriends.

Don't be satisfied with the tablescraps of attention she's giving you.
She's just not that into you... but that's great! Because you're really not that into her, either!

[watcher]

I was about to "go for it" these few days. But she is so cold and distant right now, its not funny. I definitely wouldnt try now.

I'm not the pushy kind of person. After she didn't pick up my call today, i didn't try to get her again. And then later on msn, she didn't really talk. I don't want to ask directly in case she doesnt feel the same. If she is indeed trying the "play hard to get" method, its failing, because its driving me nuts (and away).

Argh! Girls!

give her a call next week. out of the blue and ask her out to dinner. have a good time and let it be. ping her again the following weekend. set up a plan and have a good time. get a feel over the next few weeks and then let her know what you feel. if she avoids you, then i guess you have your answer. you control the pace, you control the tempo. once you lose control, it's game over brotha.. and right now, all this 'driving me nuts' puts you outta control.

give yourself 1 month. an easy 1 month... maybe several hours a week total to spend time with her and some time to think over activities. after that, you make the call.

personally, i failed to do so in doing this... and im in deep trouble now.. haha.. but hopefully, you dun fall like i do. good luck

[kkkkk]

To be honest, I don't think she's playing hard to get...
I think you were a chase, she caught up to you, and now she's bored.

Let me guess, she's really cutsey to guys, she's a fashionista, she's in relatively good shape without working out, and she probably doesn't have long lasting friends, much less boyfriends.

Don't be satisfied with the tablescraps of attention she's giving you.
She's just not that into you... but that's great! Because you're really not that into her, either!

Right. Couldn't have put it better myself: i think that i acted like a 'chase' too and now perhaps she is bored.

She is not cutesy. She is not really a fashionista. But she is in pretty good shape. Her last relationship lasted for eight months. (The previous lasted for two years.)

I'm afraid she's just not that into me. But you're wrong. Because i'm pretty into her.

give her a call next week. out of the blue and ask her out to dinner. have a good time and let it be. ping her again the following weekend. set up a plan and have a good time. get a feel over the next few weeks and then let her know what you feel. if she avoids you, then i guess you have your answer. you control the pace, you control the tempo. once you lose control, it's game over brotha.. and right now, all this 'driving me nuts' puts you outta control.

give yourself 1 month. an easy 1 month... maybe several hours a week total to spend time with her and some time to think over activities. after that, you make the call.

personally, i failed to do so in doing this... and im in deep trouble now.. haha.. but hopefully, you dun fall like i do. good luck

Well, i'm trying to control the pace now. But as you can see, i'm kinda outta control myself. I am planning to ask her out for a meal this week, to see how she acts around me, and then try to control the tempo from there.

What sort of trouble are you in now? Haha. And thanks for your help! I appreciate it!

[questions987]

Right. Couldn't have put it better myself: i think that i acted like a 'chase' too and now perhaps she is bored.

She is not cutesy. She is not really a fashionista. But she is in pretty good shape. Her last relationship lasted for eight months. (The previous lasted for two years.)

I'm afraid she's just not that into me. But you're wrong. Because i'm pretty into her.




Well, i'm trying to control the pace now. But as you can see, i'm kinda outta control myself. I am planning to ask her out for a meal this week, to see how she acts around me, and then try to control the tempo from there.

What sort of trouble are you in now? Haha. And thanks for your help! I appreciate it!

Why don't you just not call her and see if she calls you at all? I've noticed that guys that I'm intrested in - when they stop calling me, after about a week or two - I'll call them. No stress, no fuss just a "hey haven't talked to you in a couple of weeks - wanna hang out"

[watcher]

Well, i'm trying to control the pace now. But as you can see, i'm kinda outta control myself. I am planning to ask her out for a meal this week, to see how she acts around me, and then try to control the tempo from there.

What sort of trouble are you in now? Haha. And thanks for your help! I appreciate it!

yea... dont think too much of it. make it casual and if she wont respond, then you dont either. if you want some payback, you can always trying calling her once a day, exact same time, and exact same message. do it for a couple weeks and just STOP. im not much for games, but i guess it's a sucker punch. no guarantee it'll work tho. ur rolling the dice on that one, but it's a very cheap way to give her a nice little poke.

as for my trouble... i didn't back out when i should have. despite knowing what to expect and i decided to take a chance...

[kkkkk]

Why don't you just not call her and see if she calls you at all? I've noticed that guys that I'm intrested in - when they stop calling me, after about a week or two - I'll call them. No stress, no fuss just a "hey haven't talked to you in a couple of weeks - wanna hang out"

Argh. Girls!

yea... dont think too much of it. make it casual and if she wont respond, then you dont either. if you want some payback, you can always trying calling her once a day, exact same time, and exact same message. do it for a couple weeks and just STOP. im not much for games, but i guess it's a sucker punch. no guarantee it'll work tho. ur rolling the dice on that one, but it's a very cheap way to give her a nice little poke.

as for my trouble... i didn't back out when i should have. despite knowing what to expect and i decided to take a chance...

I like the idea of same time same call. But thats a little too pushy i feel! But yeah, a sucker punch for sure!

And what happened? Sounds interesting.

[watcher]

Argh. Girls!




I like the idea of same time same call. But thats a little too pushy i feel! But yeah, a sucker punch for sure!

And what happened? Sounds interesting.

that's the point. you push enough to get her to feel something. whether flattered or annoyed... the goal is to budge her emotions. once it's budged, you drop off the map. haha

what happened to me? umm... im still chasing?? hehe... i've no regrets, but i'm not sure if i would ever do this kind of thing ever again.

[taemoo]

I'm afraid she's just not that into me. But you're wrong. Because i'm pretty into her.

I'm curious to what answer you actually gave her. And why didn't you ask the question in return at the time?

[kkkkk]

I'm curious to what answer you actually gave her. And why didn't you ask the question in return at the time?

I said "you should go to bed early and sleep more". Dumb, i know (but she was pretty burnt-out from work those few days and i was confused what i should say). Her expression was blank after i replied, and i guess thats... normal

To put everything into context, here's a little background: I was hesitating if we should start a relationship because i am probably leaving in a month for at least three years, hence the weird/lame answer. I didn't know if we should give the whole long distance thing a go. I still don't know if we should, but i think i like her enough, to give this a try. (This is another issue altogether.)

Now that i think about it, i should have asked her on the spot the same question. I'll see how the next few day pans out, and if its favourable, i will likely ask her the same question.

[709394]

I fell for someone a year ago. Met up with him half a year ago, but he showed me that he was an inconsiderate selfish bubble gum. Despite this, I feel that he does truly like me ...but his immaturity and selfishness, arrogance overrides all this.

Anyway, I've been pissed off at him ever since I last saw him (we live different countries), and i deleted him off my facebook. 2 months later he sends me a friend request and says sth along the lines of 'r u ready to be my frend again', to which im thinking wtf?!! what do u mean am I READY to be frends again (he thinks he did nth wrong and i just 'need time' )? I ignore his request. A part of me REALLY wants to send him a msg and just curse him out for being a immature selfish ass, but a part of me thinks that thats what he wants...for ME to contact him first. No, that aint happening.

he sends me another friend request w/out a msg...

do u think he really truly wants to be my friend? i feel like if he did, there r soooo many other ways...sending an email..a msg...whatever, but a frend reqeust?!?!?!? dude.

should i just block his ass?
this would be a lot easier for me to deal with if i didnt still have feelings for him....

I believe in forgiving people because if you don't forgive, you won't ever be able to let go. But could you forgive someone who so intentionlly did things to make you feel bad and is so selfish? A part of it is my fault as well, for acting like a jealous girl...but i feel that my jealousy was entirely triggered by his intentional actions.

im soo confused

[JDM6]

...but his immaturity and selfishness, arrogance overrides all this.

2 months later he sends me a friend request and says sth along the lines of 'r u ready to be my frend again', to which im thinking wtf?!! what do u mean am I READY to be frends again (he thinks he did nth wrong and i just 'need time' )? I ignore his request. A part of me REALLY wants to send him a msg and just curse him out for being a immature selfish ass, but a part of me thinks that thats what he wants...for ME to contact him first. No, that aint happening.

he sends me another friend request w/out a msg...

You can do better.

Like you mentioned, a personal email would've been more sincere than a friends request and that kind of msg. I know how to make playful mgs, but that just seems more arrogant if anything. If he had your current email that is.

Either he's insecure or just straight up mean by your statement where he intentionally makes you jealous. Ever wondered why he would make you jealous?

Be careful here though, since you still have feelings for him but don't want to get hurt, don't let him fully grasp your attention. Forgive and move along. You can do much better.

[709394]

You can do better.

Like you mentioned, a personal email would've been more sincere than a friends request and that kind of msg. I know how to make playful mgs, but that just seems more arrogant if anything. If he had your current email that is.

Either he's insecure or just straight up mean by your statement where he intentionally makes you jealous. Ever wondered why he would make you jealous?

Be careful here though, since you still have feelings for him but don't want to get hurt, don't let him fully grasp your attention. Forgive and move along. You can do much better.

yeah....hes always been arrogant...thats not surprising of him actually. he certainly does have my current email so thers no excuse. Y he wants to make me jealous? Because he likes the attention. I think he liked seeing me jealous the last time I saw him (and he deliberetly did things to make me more jealous) because 1)hes immature 2)he likes the attention

forgive...how do u forgive ?

[JDM6]

yeah....hes always been arrogant...thats not surprising of him actually. he certainly does have my current email so thers no excuse. Y he wants to make me jealous? Because he likes the attention. I think he liked seeing me jealous the last time I saw him (and he deliberetly did things to make me more jealous) because 1)hes immature 2)he likes the attention

forgive...how do u forgive ?

..and if he doesn't get the attention he wants? he's gonna start to to cry and pout about it because he's immature. Is he needy? How old is this guy anywys? Hard to say if he's still a kid or just insecure.

You didn't really specified on what he did to piss you off since the last time you saw each other. I'm sure what ever it was and when you think about it, your blood starts to boil and you set off a course on a stampeding rage demolishing every obstacle in your path while shrieking at the moon. nah..j/k. But I'm sure there's a way to forgive that. Forgive by not letting the past situation affect your thoughts and emotions and going forward with a clear mind.