[watcher]

Does true love exist?

I want to believe it does, the happy optimistic me that drives my co-workers up the wall with the cheer hopes it does.

But I don't believe in it - I don't believe it does, maybe I'll end up being the crazy old lady with a bunch of dogs or ferrets because I hate cats. I just simply don't believe in true love being real (for me at least).

SOMEONE PROVE ME WRONG!

did i tell you? watcher's no longer single...

but what if i was the little french native and ive been praying for rain
what the heck am i going to do with a bunch of paper littering my lawn?

*rawr* im just extending your analogy...not taking it all together seriously but i kinda feel that way. i dont know. even though this is the real deal im going to avoid it as much as i can. if we're meant to be - we're meant to be. and no matter how much i run away God is going to make me end up with him anyways. if its not meant to be. well then running away wont hurt nothing.
--

and joseph~i just realized we're facebook buddies hahaha congratulations on your anniversary~ ^.^

if u knew what that paper was worth, you'd figure out a way to make ends meet. isn't that why you'd be asking for rain in the first place?

[questions987]

did i tell you? watcher's no longer single...

what!?!? You need to be online this morning and speak boy speak! What happened to "my only love and she was confused, blah blah blah!"

[donporkuloin]

Ok. I met this girl. We were supposed to hangout, but it didn't happen. For a little bit I was thinking she didn't want to be bothered. So we finally hung out. I gotta say we had a great time. We're gonna spend more time together for sure. One thing dawned on me. We both don't have a lot of dating experience. I was thinking of doing something to show interest when we hangout again.. like holding her hand, or kissing her at the end of the date. What would you do if you were in my shoes?

[clockwatcher]

Hold her hand. That should be sufficient. If she's inexperienced, she might not be quite ready for a kiss... unless he gives you a hint or something.

[D_K]

Ok. I met this girl. We were supposed to hangout, but it didn't happen. For a little bit I was thinking she didn't want to be bothered. So we finally hung out. I gotta say we had a great time. We're gonna spend more time together for sure. One thing dawned on me. We both don't have a lot of dating experience. I was thinking of doing something to show interest when we hangout again.. like holding her hand, or kissing her at the end of the date. What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Do what feels natural. Just go with your instincts, I'd say.

[watcher]

Ok. I met this girl. We were supposed to hangout, but it didn't happen. For a little bit I was thinking she didn't want to be bothered. So we finally hung out. I gotta say we had a great time. We're gonna spend more time together for sure. One thing dawned on me. We both don't have a lot of dating experience. I was thinking of doing something to show interest when we hangout again.. like holding her hand, or kissing her at the end of the date. What would you do if you were in my shoes?

make her laugh. flirt a little. get some feedback. and then decide on the next plan of attack. you hung out with this girl just once? u got some time. take it slow. give it another date or two. if you feel you can go for the kill on the 2nd date, that's ur call. u make the best judgment, but work your way there. you'll know chemistry when u see it in her face.

[pikapika]

I don't think that ever happens. Marrying x (as opposed to y) is not necessary for salvation, so God does not require Himself in His love and wisdom to make it happen.

(from a Christian pov)

hm
i think you misunderstood me. i wasnt talking about salvation. but i believe that God is ultimately in control of this situation and that if this whole deal is legit and he really *gulp* is the one than no matter what i do, i'm going to end up with him.
but if he's not "the one" than im just crazy

[questions987]

^^^this is going to sound totally rude but dude - have you ever heard of going with the flow?

I know it's frustrating but when you think about it - some of our best blessings are the ones that we ask god to give us and he doesn't. I'm buddhist so I totally believe in karma and making your own fate but I also believe that everything happens for a reason and the reason may not be obvious now but it will be someday.

I can honestly say that even though I don't believe in true love - I believe in love for everyone, even if it doesn't last because that love teaches something about ourselves and while loosing love is more painful than anything you can think of, in the end that loss has taught you how strong you are.

So dude: that person may be "it" or it may be a thought or determination that you've made up for yourself, but whatever it is - just take it and run. Let what happens happen, and stop over thinking it - because you won't stop it from happening, you'll just delay for a painfully long time.

[papabear]

hm
i think you misunderstood me. i wasnt talking about salvation. but i believe that God is ultimately in control of this situation and that if this whole deal is legit and he really *gulp* is the one than no matter what i do, i'm going to end up with him.
but if he's not "the one" than im just crazy

That's what I'm writing against--God isn't bound to make it happen--salvation is the only thing necessary, because He binds Himself out of love, and so He will be merciful (even if people reject His grace). But something leading to marriaget? He may think it best for both people involved, but I really don't think He "will make it happen" if one or both people are not willing. He's not going to stop someone from looking for someone else or even marrying that person, instead of the better 'match'. God is not like Romantic "fate" or "destiny."

[pikapika]

That's what I'm writing against--God isn't bound to make it happen--salvation is the only thing necessary, because He binds Himself out of love, and so He will be merciful (even if people reject His grace). But something leading to marriaget? He may think it best for both people involved, but I really don't think He "will make it happen" if one or both people are not willing. He's not going to stop someone from looking for someone else or even marrying that person, instead of the better 'match'. God is not like Romantic "fate" or "destiny."

then we believe in different things. I believe that yes God gives us free-will and allows us to wreak havoc in the world because he loves us and he wants us to freely love him.
But I do believe in soul-mates. The way he made adam AND eve. the way paul told us that it not right for man to be alone. the way he told us to love. and i believe that without God there is no way that there is one person out there completely right and perfect for you. it's illogical. there's 7 billion people in the world. the chances that out of the few thousands u meet in your lifetime that the one perfect person is in it, is tiny. but when there's God, he overcomes all chance and statistics and he can and has brought people together. he isn't BOUND to match us up, that's limiting God. but by his love and grace he gently pushes us to meet the right person. thats what im talking about. if i sincerely believe (and not just out of pure emotions or circumstances) that this guy is the one as in (dare i say it) soulmate, husband, whatever and though i am scared to the point of peeing my pants he will guide me to mr. right. i do have the choice. i can run away and if im confronted i can deny and reject. then because of his gift of free-will there's nothing more God can do.
and i love this guy. i barely know him but i know deep down im already in love. ha i said it. the thing that frightens me is that im in love with him now. im not ready now. im too selfish now. i know that if i start things with him, i'll end with him. he'll be my only and last love. but selfishly and childishly i still wanna play around. thats why im running away. im prolonging the inevitable. and im ashamed to say that im fully taking advantage of God's love and grace for me.
and so there you have it. ive bared my vulnerable soul for the whole soompi world to see. but its a bit liberating. and my heads a bit clearer than it was before. and now i cant deny whats happening now. and now....when i see him again i cant run away. uhfldsiuf;dsiuhnfidfndijsbfjdsbsdbfuds im so scared that im trembling but now that ive said all this i have to face the music.
um
this is much too personal for soompi. this is probably the most truthful thing ive ever written. i thought about deleting this all but i cant seem to do that. im going to hit "add reply" for right now. but you'll have to forgive me if i lose face in a few hours and edit all of this.

[papabear]

But I do believe in soul-mates. The way he made adam AND eve. the way paul told us that it not right for man to be alone. the way he told us to love. and i believe that without God there is no way that there is one person out there completely right and perfect for you. it's illogical. there's 7 billion people in the world. the chances that out of the few thousands u meet in your lifetime that the one perfect person is in it, is tiny. but when there's God, he overcomes all chance and statistics and he can and has brought people together. he isn't BOUND to match us up, that's limiting God. but by his love and grace he gently pushes us to meet the right person. thats what im talking about. if i sincerely believe (and not just out of pure emotions or circumstances) that this guy is the one as in (dare i say it) soulmate, husband, whatever and though i am scared to the point of peeing my pants he will guide me to mr. right. i do have the choice. i can run away and if im confronted i can deny and reject. then because of his gift of free-will there's nothing more God can do.

I don't disagree with this in essence. All I'm saying is that if you run away, God is not bound to bring him back into your life or make things work out or anything like that. Which is what you seemed to be implying in your first post.

and no matter how much i run away God is going to make me end up with him anyways.

As for God pushing people to meet the right person, perhaps if they are ready. I wouldn't try to second-guess God. I'd focus more on getting questions answered to determine true compatability; you hardly even know this person--you may be infatuated, but that's about it. (It's not clear to me from your first post if he's even expressed an interest in you.)

[watcher]

pikapika, i think you should take it easy. seems like you've hopped from one extreme to the other. i hope the shock factor doesn't cause your imagination to run wild and unnecessarily run through all sorts of scenarios in your head. figure out what those bills are about before you decide what those bills really mean to you.

[clockwatcher]

pikapika, I think you need to step back a little before you end up hurting yourself.

[Tuffcore]

Are there any examples in the Bible where God helped a dude get the girl he wanted? Seriously?

[duykato]

...I can't believe I just read all the God posts.. Screw God. Real people take life into their own hands. You want help getting girls? Call on A Pimp Named Slickback.

[coreancc]

...I can't believe I just read all the God posts.. Screw God. Real people take life into their own hands. You want help getting girls? Call on A Pimp Named Slickback.

You can try to screw Him... but you won't succeed.

[questions987]

I hate being single right now - but I can't standing dating or relationships because I end up finding jerks.

5 years and 1 month since I dated...I don't even know where to start!

[coreancc]

I hate being single right now - but I can't standing dating or relationships because I end up finding jerks.

5 years and 1 month since I dated...I don't even know where to start!

Why do you think it is that you always end up finding jerks? My wife got stuck in that rut in high school, but then consciously began to observe the giveaway signs of jerks, and purposefully avoided them. She figured out in advance what she wanted to find in a guy and then resolved not to settle for anything else. uhhh... well... I'd like to think it worked, lol.

[questions987]

You know, I think it's just what happened tonight that makes me think I end up with jerks. Thinking about my ex's, 2 of them were jerks. Some I don't even remember and the others that I do were all good to me.

It's just been 5 years since I've even dated and I think the result is that I end up thinking of the negatives and why I'm not dating. The last realtionship really scarred me and the rebound boy wasn't much better. Since Mr. Rebound (one of the jerks) I've been single - with no dating intrest but recently - I've found that I'm lonely.

[papabear]

Try some networking through family and friends? Or just meeting people in groups?

Fear of being in a 'bad relationship' can be a big hurdle to jump, but what else can you do but test the other person before you give them complete trust? And not try to get too attached in the process..