[CallieHur]

Okay, so this has been bothering me for a really long time. My friends are all typically Korean and stick skinny and small boned or whatever. I'm 5'6" and 140lbs. I don't really think I'm fat. I have an @ss and boobs and curves and I never felt badly about my body.

My friends, however, are forever saying things like, "Callie would be SO PRETTY if she lost a little weight" or "You have the prettiest face, if you just lost like 10 or 20lbs."
I think that is so much more offensive than if they just said, "You're fat" because it's like they are being nice, but fake, and insulting me at the same time. I would rather not hear them say anything at all.

And a few days ago, I overheard these guys talking about my group of friends, and they were like, "Oh, Jen has a really nice body, but she looks like a fish. Susie has really nice legs, but she has no volume. Haram has a sweet face, but sometimes it looks too long. CALLIE is pretty, but I would never date a girl that big."

My day was just totally ruined hearing how guys criticize girls so BADLY like that. My confidence and self-esteem is just like... really low right now. I mean, those guys were people I hang out with, that I considered my friends. I didn't know they would talk about us like that, especially not about me like that.

I keep wondering if maybe I do need to lose weight. Am I overweight? If everyone is saying basically the same thing about me, is it a good idea to take that criticism and change myself?

[Shikabane Hime]

If people never said anything bad, how would you know what you need to improve on?
That's the same as living a lie, except in ignorance!

I was walking around the mall one day, and this group of girls was talking about how this guy was too fat, how this guy was too short, how his head was too big, how his d*ck was too small (lol wth).

And yes, I think you should consider losing some weight. You're a girl, 5'6, and you're 140. Most of my guy friends aren't even 140 at that height.

But for the record, some pix to back up your claim would be nice

[Humilious]

Well according to your BMI, you are not overweight.

[cutiek028]

I don't think you are overweight either!

I'm 5'2'' and 120 pounds, but I sometimes go all the way to 130 pounds.

You are 4 inches taller than me! 4! And only weigh 10-20 pounds more than me.

And I don't think I'm am fat at all.

Those guys have issues. I think they should look at the problems they have with their own bodies, cause obviously, there are insecure dorks! (blaaah!)

And about the girls, next time they make a comment about your looks. "You have the prettiest face, if you just lost like 10 or 20lbs." Tell them in an incredulous voice, "Are you checking me out?" Because who the hell are they to judge you? Why are they analyzing you that closely? It's weird! That will shut them up.

And also, about what the boys were saying: my friends personally don't analyze guys we know like that. But we might have talked about an artist looks once in a while. And me and mom and my sister talk about people's looks at home too. And since they though they were in privacy, they just said whatever they wanted, you know? You weren't supposed to hear that stuff. Which doesn't make it any nicer, but I guess you should consider that fact. Maybe all of them don't think that about you, but just agreed 'cause they didn't want to be the ass who ruins the mood by taking their talk seriously. If you ever catch them talking about you again, just go *ahem* *ahem* and let them know you are there! I bet they'll freak out! And then you can be like *bwahahaha blackmail* (lol)

[pencil_geeks*]

I know how you feel. I was "curvy" compared to them. So to get attention they dressed like whores. But everyday I was told I'm fat but to non asians they saw me as skinny. I stayed at my cousin's house while i was down there which was full of fobs so obviously being anorexic skinny is the ish.

I told my coworker and she said.. "it doesn't matter, you have what other asian girls lack. so flaunt it! ahahha"

[Star!Stung]

If they say things like that to you, I don't think they're your real friends. Or are they just friends you hang out with but don't talk much?
I think you're just fine. I'm 4 inches shorter than you but I weigh the same. None of my friends make fun of my weight or size. Most of them lie and say I'm just fine. I guess some of my weight is muscle so I'm not that big. Most people think I'm 130 or something so I guess so.

Don't let what others say get to you. Just know you're the better person because you don't go around saying those things.

And the part about guys, that's just one or a few guys. A lot of guys like curvy women. If they say that about you, don't bother with them.

Be proud of what you have. You'll be a lot happier.

[littlejade]

Friends says the truth! & they even say it nicely! What do u want? .. u complain too much!
Okay, your fat!! happy? ..

Why u say they fake anyways? .. so all your friends are not friends.. they 2-face is that what u saying? .. u dont have real friends?

they said your pretty! .. so why u complainin for? .. they saw a potential in you! .. n they thought they let u know!. take it as a compliment! U dont have to lose weight if u dont want to! they just pointing it out! .. just say your happy the way u r! ..

okay.. i gues im a bit mean! .. maybe its best they say it honestly.. and not fake-nicely if thats not their natural personality.. is that why u upset about it? .. real friends wont try to hurt ur feelings! .. im sure they dont mean it in bad way!

[sukixyume]

We all judge other people at some point... it's the truth. You know that you can't expect them to always say nice things to you or about you, they'd be lying. Lol. Face it, girls criticize guys too. We're all humans, we're ALL shallow to a certain extent. I've had a few people who called me fat and stuff when I'm only 102lbs, just don't mind too much on the things those people say about you and let it affect your life.

[Jonny7]

We all judge other people at some point... it's the truth. You know that you can't expect them to always say nice things to you or about you, they'd be lying. Lol. Face it, girls criticize guys too. We're all humans, we're ALL shallow to a certain extent. I've had a few people who called me fat and stuff when I'm only 102lbs, just don't mind too much on the things those people say about you and let it affect your life.

its not hard to lose weight. and i am not saying dont eat, that makes it worse

[.:precious:.]

nope dont lose weight notice that youve never felt bad about your body until these people? maybe their what you need to loose. or if anything talk to them about it and have like a serious convo. not like yelling and like OMG your so shallow and fake but tell them that tactfully.

[maly&ahpulee]

I read somewhere that for women over five feet, add 5lbs per inch in how tall you are and that's the weight you're supposed to weigh to be healthy. You can try google-ing it. But for myself, I'm overweight and do think that I need to lose weight so I don't even care what people say about me anymore, although I've never heard my friends talk about my weight! If you personally think that you should lose a couple of pounds then I say go for it. Whatever you think is best for you =)

[xxiaoMEI]

Eh, so true..
and atleast they said you're pretty though?
Dont let what someone else say bring you down.

I was talking to this guy in my class one day and he literally said that "I'm ugly" right up to my face.
I mean, its not like hes so hot himself.
So, just dont take things so seriously (: I just think that guys a total ass now, butwhatever.

[한스 ㅋㅋ]

I wouldn't blame them if it was the truth.

Honestly, I'm fat as well, but not so fat. Some people say to me that I'm fat.
so? anything wrong in being fat? yea there is. You do look uglier. But it's my problem.
But my point is, they did say something true. So how could I blame them?

If I were you, I'd take their advice. After all, life is unfair and evil anyway, You can't live freely and easily in this world.

But for the record, some pix to back up your claim would be nice

I agree. not all people look bad when they're fat. Well kind of depends though, I'm dumb at ft and lbs. I only know cms and kgs, so I don't know how much you weight xD

[lovenotee]

if you like your body, know you cute, and all of that you shouldnt let what they say get to you
chances are they're not important in your life so why would it matter
girrl, a lot of females would want your a** or boobs lol some are just jealous and insecure so they say all that.
i just wish girls could have the balls to awknowledge each other

[MeltingSnow]

I don't think you are overweight either!

I'm 5'2'' and 120 pounds, but I sometimes go all the way to 130 pounds.

You are 4 inches taller than me! 4! And only weigh 10-20 pounds more than me.

And I don't think I'm am fat at all.

Those guys have issues. I think they should look at the problems they have with their own bodies, cause obviously, there are insecure dorks! (blaaah!)

And about the girls, next time they make a comment about your looks. "You have the prettiest face, if you just lost like 10 or 20lbs." Tell them in an incredulous voice, "Are you checking me out?" Because who the hell are they to judge you? Why are they analyzing you that closely? It's weird! That will shut them up.

And also, about what the boys were saying: my friends personally don't analyze guys we know like that. But we might have talked about an artist looks once in a while. And me and mom and my sister talk about people's looks at home too. And since they though they were in privacy, they just said whatever they wanted, you know? You weren't supposed to hear that stuff. Which doesn't make it any nicer, but I guess you should consider that fact. Maybe all of them don't think that about you, but just agreed 'cause they didn't want to be the ass who ruins the mood by taking their talk seriously. If you ever catch them talking about you again, just go *ahem* *ahem* and let them know you are there! I bet they'll freak out! And then you can be like *bwahahaha blackmail* (lol)

Mm, I'm the same too. 5"2, 120 pounds. I look normal, and I have never been called fat. (Except by some skinny kid, but calls himself fat; anyway.)

The same should be for you. If you're leading a healthy lifestyle, then I don't see what's the problem. Guys in general like healthy girlies anyway. (x The hell with those Tom Cruise.

(By the way, blackmail is fun. ;D)

[JJ no Baka]

Flaunt what you have. Your friends should appreciate you for who you are and how you look like. I think you're perfectly fine for a 5'6. Remember, guys don't have boobs and butt to go along with that weight. Be proud of what you have. Just ignore what your friends say. I think the whole "korean should always be skinny, big eyes, blahblah" is too overrated.

[GreenTeaSparkles]

everyone's different, some prefer skinny girls, and some prefer chubby girls. those guys you know just prefer skinny girls.

[JazzyMina]

My advice is to find new friends who are beter then the ones you have ryt now. How can they be ur friends if their just so damn rude and nasty? =O! ~
Its true wat people hv said here, its good to be honest about things, but theres a difference between being polite and nice about it to crosing the line, No real friends would critisize ur weight like that. They sodnt judge just becz their skinny. <-- thts for the girls.

If you feel urself that your happy the way you are. Then dont change and " lose weight " as some idiots said on this thread.

If anybodys nasty to you about ur weight, hold ur head high and ignore them even though its hurtful and hard.

@ Shikabane Hime - The girl doesnt need to lose weight if she doesnt want to >.> dont enccourage people to do so for the wrong reasons.
@ little jade - what u said was mostly wrong n abit nasty, the girl hasnt been complaining at al =.=

[lea11]

OP: I think you mean, "If you don't having anything nice to say, then don't say ANYTHING"

not going all ghetto now, are we?

[MaryMagdalin]

If people never said anything bad, how would you know what you need to improve on?
That's the same as living a lie, except in ignorance!

I was walking around the mall one day, and this group of girls was talking about how this guy was too fat, how this guy was too short, how his head was too big, how his d*ck was too small (lol wth).

And yes, I think you should consider losing some weight. You're a girl, 5'6, and you're 140. Most of my guy friends aren't even 140 at that height.

But for the record, some pix to back up your claim would be nice

i agree.
my friends tell me what they think of me honestly
if i`m gaining weight, if i`m too skinny.

your bmi is fine.
you arent overweight.
think of it as self improvement.
there are always going to be people talking about you.


and just to let you know i know a lot of guys who prefer "bigger" girls.
my bf is really unhappy with how skinny i am and wishes me to gain 10 lb.
no kidding.