[ai-Do1Ce]

After a breakup, things can get awkward. And because you got to know the person so deeply inside and out, sometimes it�s just impossible to get along after the separation. So when the two people want to get along, do they somehow make themselves �reknow� the person? so.. letting go of who the person was in the past (stop replaying expereinces in their head) and just pretend they just know the person not long ago? sorta like self tricking?

i mean, after a couple breaks up.. they�re bound to be uncomfortable with each other because of their shared memories and experiences of the past.. and they�d take these memories with them when they see each other. So to get comfortable with each other again, would they have to let go of each othher from the past and accept each othher in the present. I don�t think im making sense here but you know, put away everything tey�ve known about each other and just assume theyre not the same anymore. When they talk, they take in whatever they hear and respond to it as what it is- instead of relfetcing on everything and be like..�wow, he changed.......wow he really moved on....wow...wow...� bcause that would just prevent them from knowing each other again?


they would have to let go of who each other were.. and they also need to pretend that the other person doesnt know them... so they coulld act however thhey want (just like how they would to a stranger who doesnt know them well) without the pressure of needing to be someone in particular?

does this work?


am i making much sense =\

[jjashik]

not all break ups are awkward. o.O;
i'm still like friends wiht my ex.
actually he's a close friend of mines
since we both know each other inside out.
ahahah.

[llxwishingxstarxll]

it is pretty awkward to talk to an ex right after the break up so what i do to avoid that awkwardness is to completely ignore that person until i feel like i have totally moved on and feel comfortable enough to talk to that person again. i think its impossible to be friends with an ex right after the break up. either you've never loved that person thats why its so easy for u to talk to them again or you still love him/her n it would hurt alot to even try to talk to them when they act like strangers towards u.

[insanelyCRAZY]

my exbf and i tried doing that.
it didnt work out too well.

[melOng-xP]

well, ive never really experienced
the arkwardness after breakups...
its hard for me to ignore people and
keep grudges so we generally end
up being pretty good friends even
after a bitter break up. hehe (=

[Steffany.]

One of my good friends is an ex; we were on and off for about 2 years. Of course naturally, right after a break up it's not going to be the same. You let time do it's thing and allow both of you to just let the feelings fade.. eventually one of you will initiate a conversation; it's not the feeling of "tricking yourself" into thinking you just met, it's just the reassurance that even through the past, you both can still have each other in your lives.

[swo0o]

Can't happen right after a break up..
The girls tend to fall right back into love with the guy.
Not saying that the guys wouldn't either.

Best to wait it out, until you move on..
I sense that me and my ex will be gooood friends oneday, but if I started talking to him again now..
I'd just fall right back in.

[Humilious]

My ex and I aren't awkward. We had a funny talk about an obsession today and started a chat room for our friends. I invited him to go watch a movie. If you're willing to make it work, it'll work. People just have too many preconceived notions of how bad it can go with an ex.

[hippiehop]

No, I don't think tricking yourself to "forget" is the right way to be friends with an ex, but I also believe you can't be friends with an ex unless your feelings for him are no longer romantic.

[insanelyCRAZY]

No, I don't think tricking yourself to "forget" is the right way to be friends with an ex, but I also believe you can't be friends with an ex unless your feelings for him are no longer romantic.

ive proven you correct. LOL

[pocketsoul]

I think that would be weird for both of you because you'll both still know each other even as you pretend you don't. Your thoughts about them previously will still be in the back of your head no matter what. The thing is, you can't force your mind not to reflect on the past... it's sort of a natural process.

If it's really that difficult to get along with him, I'd stop trying to force it to happen and step away for awhile. Sometimes time apart can help you to stop thinking so much about what you should say and how you should act around him immediately after a break up. You need some time to get used to the idea of just being friends.

[thatonegirl]

my ex and i are still really close, we have no awkward boundaries or anything and i can still tell him everything i can't tell anyone else.

[kishycathiee]

i hardly knew him, so we were still friends after LOLLL.

[mal3ficum]

well i dont think thats always the case.
my very first ex we werent together for very long and honestly we hardly knew each other but still talked quite a bit. he distanced himself from me for like pwoah, 6 months?! but then we became better friends, and actually got to know each others 'real' sides.

my second; its awkward. like when i see him around, which isnt actually that often, i dont know what to say to him. he hasnt changed at all i reckon ._.

anyways i dont think i answered your question at all LOL! its not the case for me. it really depends on the people. and when i see my ex again i dont think of memories

[Daix2]

that's not how it is for me. i'm friends with my first ex, and he was my longest relation ship (2 years and a half) we talk all the time and we still bring up some things from the past. we'll be like "hey, you remember -insert memory of us" "OH YEAH LOLOLOL WOW YOU WERE SO DUMB!" he even brings up stuff that would make it awkward for other people, but i'm not bothered by it? XD idk. we're cool.

but my second ex... yah. apparently to him "ex's can't be friends" lollll

[Harbl]

Reminds me of that film with Ace Ventura where he erases his memory in the hope he can re-fall in love with the woman he used to love. Or something.

Can't for the life of me remember what it was called or if that was actually the plot.

[angelZ]

i usually cut off all contact with exes...except the most recent one
...& now we still talk once in awhile.
moving to another country also helped otherwise i would definitely stop talking to him.