[Subways]

For whatever reasons I think my social skills have been dying. I use to think not being able to continue and keep a convo going was because I lacked chemistry with certain people. But now its happening with everyone where I would try to start small talk which would just be me asking endless amounts of little questions that go nowhere. Or vice versa. And its not like the other individual isn't trying either I know they are because this is happening with friends in my group too its quite awkward that I can't hold a convo with my own friends anymore without weird awkward silences.

So anyone else experience this? Anyone have advice on how to improve besides just talking to people more or more different individuals?

Anyone to practise with? ha.

[ShadowMax76]

some people can pull off the silly comments, random observations, etc. _ ":D HAY ! A SANTA CLAUS! -chases into distance-" [icebreakers]

others would just say "eash.. Haha. sorry. i can't think of anythin' to say. o_O' what's on your mind?"

_ just find something in common. or poke about their inspirations.. cuz anyone can ramble on about those.

what gets a lot of meaningless but fun talk out is teasing them. it's half the fun. but that's just me . nyahaha

[小甜密]

Enjoy talking to them, it's always fun to chat with people if you're really into the convo. If you feel good, then that positive vibe will rub off onto them. And conversation will carry on fluently. At least, it works for me. But none of this can be achieved if you don't feel good about yourself first.

[ching22194]

it happens to me.
before i get along with my friends, we finishes somebody's sentence
as years pass they tend to go out a lot, out of town bar hopping
and things like that. due to financial issue i cant afford to do it everytime
there are times they dont invite me anymore coz they know i wont come

during those times they bonded a lot.
when i try to meet up with them i find it difficult to mingle
they were talking things i cant relate to, so i end up listening to them
barely talking. being an introvert doesnt help coz i find it difficult to have new friends

coincidentally, i joined soompi so i could feel how to converse to other
peole i dont know, or just a place to speak my mind.
its a therapy for me..

[[HyuNi]]

"Some cause happiness wherever they go, others whenever they go" - Oscar Wilde

Some people just don't realize the atmosphere or their environment.
For example, talking about school and grades is probably a good coversation in between classes, but it's probably not at the bars/clubs or to people who've been out of school for years.

Also, I think it's important to talk about things that interest you, instead of trying to squeeze into a topic that you don't know much about. At the same time, don't talk about things that ONLY interests you. My jaw literally drops open when a group of people and I are talking about one subject and someone butts in and brings up a completely different topic. I come to the conclusion that he/she probably wasn't listening to whatever we were saying.

In your case, I think you just don't feel a strong enough connection to anybody to make you really want to have a deep conversation with them. According to yourself, most of your conversations are just small talk and little questions. Sounds like formalities such as "how are you? How are things? What did you do this weekend?"
Maybe next time you and your friends get together, you can just listen and get an idea of what your friends usually talk about or figure out what each friend's hobbies and likes/dislikes are. That way you might find out what things you have in common and have an arsenal of things to talk about the next time around.

Listening is such an underrated skill these days.

[Lie]

Maybe you need more exciting things going on in your life to talk to people about? Try to get attacked by an angry beaver or something, that might help.

[watcher]

Maybe you need more exciting things going on in your life to talk to people about? Try to get attacked by an angry beaver or something, that might help.

or maybe start reading the newspaper or interesting books =)

[bee21192]

the exact same thing's happening to me!
when i was younger, i used to be the leader type that says, let's go there and everybody would go..
now, though i aspire to leading positions, nobody really even considers me as such because they'd say,
" you're just not that type of person"
and my conversations with ppl are just as u udescribe..
unfortunately, i dont know if this happens to u too, but i'm too egotistical to make such a great change so as to make myself fit in with the others..
until not so long ago, i used to be happy the way i was, even though i was a bit lonely..
as in, my friends just bum in one place for hours thinking of where to go, who's going, waiting for somebody etc..
but i just cant do that, so i leave
but i don't wanna change and stay there wasting my time just in order to bond with them more! haha
so i'm stuck..
nonetheless, i am trying to change a bit and be more open and tolerant to other people (i get frustrated with ppl relli easily and am srsly impatient >.<) give in a little, while still maintaining my own colour ^^
dont know if that was much of a help, but it's good to know somebody's going thru something similar hehe
i don't know who u r but if ur srsly without nebody to talk to, send a pm! kk

[popolala]

Enjoy talking to them, it's always fun to chat with people if you're really into the convo. If you feel good, then that positive vibe will rub off onto them. And conversation will carry on fluently. At least, it works for me. But none of this can be achieved if you don't feel good about yourself first.

I agree, u got to feel good about yourself. try do things that would make u feel happy!
when your happy, u have lots of good things to say.

[heartnet]

get involved with anything and everything (or just whatever you can)

[mama_gir1]

Find something common between you guys.
I'm like this with some girls in my group, that's because we have nothing in common.
Where as with other girls, who I do have things in common, even if there were silences, it wouldn't be awkward.

Another tip is to have some short jokes handy.
If there is a long awkward silence, tell them one. =)