[xo_sugar_ox]

edit: nevermind! sorry x__x

[aznangl136]

Hi it'd be great if i could get some advice on this one,
So yesterday was my eighteenth birthday and also the day i got back from a weeklong trip. My boyfriend texted me "i miss you" and "i love you" throughout the trip and when i saw him for the first time in a week (and on my birthday) there was no affection. We went to the beach and he didn't touch me at all; we didn't hold hands and there was no kiss goodbye. I'm starting to feel like i'm having a texting relationship versus a real life relationship should i let him know? and how? or am i just being oversensitive? Thanks!

[kakahead]

hello fellow soompiers =]
i just wanted to hear you guys opinion so here i go
well i went out with my ex for 2yrs..
he was my first love and i was his..
we broke up when i went away for a year n half
we ended getting back together
three months passed and i broke up with him
a month after i realized the mistake i made and been begging to him to get back with me
to find out that weekend that he had someone else
i think i should move on since i was the one who broke his heart but
i just cant seem to let go.. as the days passes seems like my feelings for him are getting stronger
we still talk as friends now
he is really cold to me sometimes
but he also flirts with me and gives me hope other times
he pulls the string one day and lets it loose the other
im confused i want him to be happy for him and his new gf but at the same time i want him back
i dont know how to let go
i dont know if i should let go or wait for him..
sigh
any opinions would help
tyvm in advance

[greeenkiwi]

graacekimm: Well there's really not much you can do. I mean, you are who you are. If you wanted to you could just try talking louder but if you can't then just be proud of who you are. If people think you're faking it, then so be it. You wouldn't want to be friends with people who immediately judge you as fake/not being true to yourself and aren't open minded enough to know that everyone is different. But if they ask you to repeat something and they seem nice/put effort into trying to hear you then you should also be patient and help them hear what you are trying to say. Like I usually don't talk very loudly and random people/strangers usually say "WOW, I can't believe you can actually hear her." but my mom, sister, and extremely loud boyfriend all have gotten used to it and hear me perfectly clear! Don't frustrate yourself over this; just be happy & don't spend so much time thinking about it. Good luck~

aznangl136: Is this usually how your bf is though? For example, I'm the type of person who has trouble opening up and being all sweet/affectionate towards someone so maybe your bf is the same? I would have an easier time texting sweet stuff because I wouldn't have to actually say it out loud. So if your boyfriend is the quiet type don't bash him for it. It's normal to feel a sad about it, b/c my bf has complained to me too. But if you just try to take control like grabbing his hand, saying "i love you", etc. even if he may not say/show any indication that it's what he wants..he's probably just silently thinking it in his mind. Eventually if you do it first he'll get used to it and be more comfortable being more affectionate towards you. You should probably hint it at him nicely though that you wish he would hug/kiss/touch/whatever to you more in public. Also try being more blunt (without being mean).. like if he doesn't kiss you goodbye just straight out ask him, "Where's my goodbye kiss?" haha.
But if this is something new, then probably somethings up so you should ask him.

kakahead: So you're going through the "don't know what you have til it's gone" phase. I've been there. It sucks. But are you sure you really want him back? Do you just love him because he's your first love? It can be pretty difficult to let go of your first love. But he has another gf now and you shouldn't try to break it off between them, TRUST ME. It will just cause you more unnecessary problems and sadness. What I've learned is to just always expect the worst. That way, if he does end up coming back, then great.. it's like a bonus.. if that makes sense. You just have to focus and really believe that it's over between you two. You can't keep searching for clues or having hope because it's really going to do you no good. Just be strong. He has a gf so don't let him be giving you these clues. I mean what if some girl did this to you & your boyfriend? You wouldn't like it, right? I know it is difficult, but try your best to just move on. I remember when I was going through a time like yours and I finally realized and told myself, 'hey, it's okay if I still love him. Letting go is stupid because I know that I will always love him, but I can't let my love for someone else get in the way of my life. And I can't be selfish; if I truly love him then I'll accept his choices.' If you just keep yourself occupied with maybe school, work, friends.. eventually you will learn how to move on and let go.

[Daylightful]

um I wanted to ask..

there's an anime/manga/Japanese culture event which is Australia's biggest geek event of the year..and there's this girl I've started talking to on Deviant Art [it's a artist community site] and I like how she is and I'll probably will see her at the event next week and I was wondering..

would it be weird by just coming up to her and saying 'hey you're such and such from D.A right? I'm blah blah, nice to meet you'? because I honestly want to meet her and maybe...well ask her out but how soon is too soon to ask her out? and she's a student from Singapore but she's only here for a certain number of years..is that too early to worry about?

cause I've never....EVER talked to someone out in the open and just introduced myself then well...ask the girl out lol I'm all paranoid and feel all nervous XD

Doh-- sorry if this is too late. I haven't been on much. And no! I don't think that is weird, but you should be calm and smooth about it. As in, "Hi! You're from Deviantart, right? I was totally reading EVERY SINGLE blogs you wrote about, and I totally knew you were here, I recognize you from ALL of your photos" That may seem a bit.. creepyish. But yeah! Why not send her a message asking her if she's going? Just be casual. And if she says she hasn't been thinking about it, then invite her and tell her you guys could go together! Or if she says she is, tell her you guys should totally meet up! Maybe share some art tips, and just be geeks. As for asking her out as in dating, you should probably wait until she gets to know you better. Just go out as friends for a bit, then you can ask her out when she feeels more comfortable around you! Good luck!

HII
i need help ):
i normally have this really high voice >_>
some people think that i TRY to act cute
but i really don't
i act the way i do

my voice is really soft and somewhat cute -_____-;;
people can't hear me that well and ask me to repeat things OVER AND OVER AGAIN -___-
i do but then they STILL can't hear me ):
SOOOOO i just tell them to forget it
cos it's usually nothing important

when i meet to people,
they always get surprised when i talk
and ask me why/is my voice always like that

my voice and face do NOT match..
wat should i do ):
and any advice?

Doh!! I'm the EXACT same way! No worries! I have a really low and a high-pitched voice. I sound like a 10 year old. A lot of people can't hear me, and I have to ask people to speak up for me, because it's just that bad. Sometimes I tell them to forget about it when they continue to question me. Anyhow, the best thing you could do is maybe asking a singer or someone who is pretty well-known with all the little singing techniques to help you out with being able to talk higher. They have little voice training that could surely be of help for you! But that's honestly you can do. Unless you do some other voice training, your voice will be like that, unless it hasn't cracked yet? How old are you? Maybe it's just taking awhile. As for me, I'm talking like this for the rest of my life. Just be proud of your voice! Love it!! Just know your voice is different than everyone else. Besides, it comes in handy! When telemarketers call, and you don't want to talk to them, but when you answer and they think you're the child of the household, and just say your parents aren't home. XD Okay, that may be a little bit odd, but it does come in handy a lot! So feel good about it! I suggest trying to talk to a singer, though. Good luck!

Hi it'd be great if i could get some advice on this one,
So yesterday was my eighteenth birthday and also the day i got back from a weeklong trip. My boyfriend texted me "i miss you" and "i love you" throughout the trip and when i saw him for the first time in a week (and on my birthday) there was no affection. We went to the beach and he didn't touch me at all; we didn't hold hands and there was no kiss goodbye. I'm starting to feel like i'm having a texting relationship versus a real life relationship should i let him know? and how? or am i just being oversensitive? Thanks!

Of course let him know! You have to communicate. If there is something on your mind, tell him! There ar emany ways you can let him know. And no, you aren't being oversensitive. I mean, isn't a relationship suppose to have the holding hands, kissing, etc? Why not call him or meet up with him in person? You can call him, and say, "Hey ___, are things okay? We're not being as affection as we were (or if you never were affection) I miss the holding hands and the ksising, I love you, I hope I can be in your arms once more to show that." That's just an idea, you don't have to say things like that. But yeah! You can be the same way as meeting in person, maybe go back to the beach, sit down, stare at the sunset, and bring it up, maybe he'll crawl over and hug you. Who knows? But good luck! Do let him know!! Communcate is a good thing. Good luck!

hello fellow soompiers =]
i just wanted to hear you guys opinion so here i go
well i went out with my ex for 2yrs..
he was my first love and i was his..
we broke up when i went away for a year n half
we ended getting back together
three months passed and i broke up with him
a month after i realized the mistake i made and been begging to him to get back with me
to find out that weekend that he had someone else
i think i should move on since i was the one who broke his heart but
i just cant seem to let go.. as the days passes seems like my feelings for him are getting stronger
we still talk as friends now
he is really cold to me sometimes
but he also flirts with me and gives me hope other times
he pulls the string one day and lets it loose the other
im confused i want him to be happy for him and his new gf but at the same time i want him back
i dont know how to let go
i dont know if i should let go or wait for him..
sigh
any opinions would help
tyvm in advance

D'aw.. I'm sorry.. One thing you should know about guys, they're weird. They pull and let go a lot. And I think MOST of the time, they don't even REALIZE they're doing it. As girls, any little thing we see we see it as hope and try and hold onto it. I'm really am sorry again. But the best thing you can do is to let him go at the moment. He has a girlfriend, and it isn't exactly fair for her, either. Don't push your feelings onto him because this may scare him as well. Give him some time with her. Maybe he may realize that she isn't the one, and really misses you. BUT DON'T HOLD ONTO THAT, because maybe he really does like her! Just let them be for the moment! You're just hurting yourself the more you are holding and waiting. Let him come to you when he needs you! Go out and have fun! Go with friends, go out to restaurant, play games with family, etc. Little things like that would make you feel a lot better than staying cooped inside the house waiting for him to call. He'll come to you when he needs it. As for now, give him his time. I know it hurts, and I know you blame yourself. We all make mistakes, it happens. And if he doesn't come back, that doesn't mean there aren't other guys. I'm sure you will find someone who would care for you just as much as he did. Try and think of this as a more positive thing and a learning experience. Now you know what to do and say. Good luck!

[abductedalchemist]

ok here's the story, my ex broke up w/ me a while ago
in thebe ginning of summer, he was cold to me, so i stopped talking to him
then he started talking to me for some reason. like we were best friends ,why?

and also, we stopped talking about 2 weeks ago and last night, we talked but i was really cold.
should i keep being cold to him? i felt really bad , but my friend told me to be cold....

and he's on my bus this school year, should i sit w/ him? or should i ignore him and sit somewhere else? cuz last year we sat w/ each other every day... i hope i made sense >_< please and thanks

[Daylightful]

ok here's the story, my ex broke up w/ me a while ago
in thebe ginning of summer, he was cold to me, so i stopped talking to him
then he started talking to me for some reason. like we were best friends ,why?

and also, we stopped talking about 2 weeks ago and last night, we talked but i was really cold.
should i keep being cold to him? i felt really bad , but my friend told me to be cold....

and he's on my bus this school year, should i sit w/ him? or should i ignore him and sit somewhere else? cuz last year we sat w/ each other every day... i hope i made sense >_< please and thanks

Well, you should do what you want to do. But yes, being cold may be in best interest. Why? If you end up warming up again, opening up to him, and trying to get him he may end up hurting you again or he'll feel comfortable around you to be able to treat you cold.
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder." The more you are away from him, the more he'll want to talk to you. Whereas if you opened up, he may grow less fonder, and cold again. Guys can leave some strange signals, so I don't know what he could be signing here. But I think you should wait a bit more, let him come to you when he needs you to. Not saying you don't have to be friends, but just continue doing what you are. And if you feel like the time is right to be able to open up and be best friends, then go for it. I know it's tough, I had to go through something similar to this, and I love trying to talk and comfort, but I had to leave him alone for a bit, let him be. Now, he's talking to me a lot more, more worried, etc. He wasn't exactly a lover or anything, but it's similar to your situation. Just sit with other friends, enjoy your time otherwise, instead of worrying over him. I'm sure when time is right, you'll know when to talk to him again. Good luck!

[Kaylme]

so there is this guy that i really like and he just thinks of me as a friend and he doesn't want a girlfriend but like i really want him to ask me out or just to let him know that I like him but then will that ruin our friendship?

[greeenkiwi]

so there is this guy that i really like and he just thinks of me as a friend and he doesn't want a girlfriend but like i really want him to ask me out or just to let him know that I like him but then will that ruin our friendship?

Well, would you like to keep quiet and probably regret it later and be left wondering, "what if..?" This is the "safe" choice.
Or, just take your chances and tell him. If he truly isn't interested, then things would get awkward and most likely your friendship will never ever be the way it is again. He might be immature and never speak to you again or be the bigger person and try to keep your friendship normal. On the bright side, he might not be interested in you right now but maybe if he knew you did he could begin to show more interest and consider the idea of you two being an item. (:

[kakahead]

Thank you greeenkiwi and Fumouffu for the advice =] yeah i always thought it was unfair to his
gf if i kept on trying to get him back.. i would hate if someone did that to me..

I actually got to see him on friday when i went to visit my friends
after i saw him i think my heart was ready to let go
i guess i just needed that closure because even after we broke up we didnt get to see each other
i guess i just needed him
before every song would make wanna cry i would stay up all night depressed and emo over him
but now im better i think my heart is letting go
=] if we were really meant to be then i guess in the future we'll meet again no?

[greeenkiwi]

^ Good to hear you are staying strong. And yes, what is meant for you will eventually come back.
Just be patient and don't force yourself into things. It's normal to have your weakest moments and just cry as well.

[Daylightful]

so there is this guy that i really like and he just thinks of me as a friend and he doesn't want a girlfriend but like i really want him to ask me out or just to let him know that I like him but then will that ruin our friendship?

The best thing is probably to wait for a bit, before letting him know you like him. He stated that he doesn't want a girlfriend, so kind of confessing to him won't exactly.. change anything, you see? Just wait and be yourself!! Don't pretend to be anyone else. Always smile, and just stay confident! Best thing you can do is to try and hang out with him more often and do more things together. Feelings can increase over time, and the more you are with someone the more you may realize such feelings. It's best to keep your crush on the hush hush for now, and just have fun with him for a bit! Good luck~

Thank you greeenkiwi and Fumouffu for the advice =] yeah i always thought it was unfair to his
gf if i kept on trying to get him back.. i would hate if someone did that to me..

I actually got to see him on friday when i went to visit my friends
after i saw him i think my heart was ready to let go
i guess i just needed that closure because even after we broke up we didnt get to see each other
i guess i just needed him
before every song would make wanna cry i would stay up all night depressed and emo over him
but now im better i think my heart is letting go
=] if we were really meant to be then i guess in the future we'll meet again no?

Woo! Exactly! I'm sorry it my be painful, but I'm really am happy you found closure. Just go out and have fun!! Live your life! We're still young here, girl. Remember-- there was a reason you broke up with him, right? This could be for the best. Love is mysterious, mysterious indeed. Whether he is the one or not, only the future can tell. Love is also very spontaneous! It can just happen! So just go have fun, hang out with friends, play sports, go to an arcade, study for school, work, etc and then BAM it'll just happen! XD But good luck! Have a nice time and I hope things work out for you. -Huggles.-

[dorkygurl4life]

so here is my story, my boyfriend and I have been dating a little over 2 months. Our first month was fine, we talk everyday to each other, he said/did corny stuff for me and he always happy around me and was never bored. we never ran out of stuff to talk about. he would always call me when he first wake up in the morning. everytime we see each other, we would hug each other for a long time. also, he wasnt scare of doing retarded stuff in front of me.

but after that month, everything went downhill. we slowly stopped talking to each other.. now we barely even talk. he doesnt call me anymore and when we're together.. its all quiet and nothing to talk about. I tried to talk to him about it, but it didnt really turn out so great so we havent solve out the problem.. and our problem is communication since i've moved and we dont go to same school. we both have strict parents and arent allow to date.

i really want to work it out with him because i dont want to lose/ see him gone from my life. I really want to talk to him about it again but i really dont know how. and if we do talk about it, what are some stuff should i mention ?

[greeenkiwi]

dorkygurl4life: Looks like the honeymoon phase just ended for you two.
Anyways, why doesn't you're boyfriend make an effort to call you? Or talk to you about the problems? It seems like he is doing it on purpose; maybe he wants you to break up with him because he can't do it himself? As much as you still want to be with him, a relationship will never work out if BOTH are not willing to put 100% of their heart into it. You should talk to him when he's not busy. The next time you guys hang out, you should bring it up since you said there's an awkward silence now. Or if you won't be seeing him sometime soon, call him and tell him that you really need to talk to him about something serious when he has time.
When you find the time to talk to him, remember to start off calm. Just straight out nicely ask him, "_______, do you still want to be with me?" If he says yes, then remind him of how perfect you two used to be a month ago and ask him why everything has changed. Tell him you feel sad because he doesn't call you anymore and pretty much all the problems you two have. Then you guys can come up with a solution together.

Good luck to you.

[Daylightful]

so here is my story, my boyfriend and I have been dating a little over 2 months. Our first month was fine, we talk everyday to each other, he said/did corny stuff for me and he always happy around me and was never bored. we never ran out of stuff to talk about. he would always call me when he first wake up in the morning. everytime we see each other, we would hug each other for a long time. also, he wasnt scare of doing retarded stuff in front of me.

but after that month, everything went downhill. we slowly stopped talking to each other.. now we barely even talk. he doesnt call me anymore and when we're together.. its all quiet and nothing to talk about. I tried to talk to him about it, but it didnt really turn out so great so we havent solve out the problem.. and our problem is communication since i've moved and we dont go to same school. we both have strict parents and arent allow to date.

i really want to work it out with him because i dont want to lose/ see him gone from my life. I really want to talk to him about it again but i really dont know how. and if we do talk about it, what are some stuff should i mention ?

You should most definitely tell him how you feel about these things! Tell him that you feel like things are going downhill because he isn't being the same way he used to. Tell him you miss all the things but you still care for him deeply, despite the fact you two are in separate schools. You guys can try and meet-up as many times as possible. Also, even if you couldn't see each other email, IM, Facebook, text, call, etc as often as you can! I suggest also trying to talk to your parents too. Bring up the fact that you guys really like each other, and show that he's a great person and vice-versa. I'm sure they'll understand if you have a nice, calm conversation with them. You do need to open up and tell him what is on your min and on your heart, otherwise he won't know. Sometimes he may not even notice! Best of luck to you! I really hope things go well!

[Uverstar]

how do you make friends if you don't attend University or TAFE (like uni um..but in a different environment) anymore?

because I only work now in a graphics office as an assistant and..sure I get a long with everyone, we go out sometimes to hang out but I have no clue where else to make friends considering I'm not in like..a social environment like a University..

any help?..

[` ilytoo;]

i have a quick issue i been dealing with.
So i had this friend, who we hung out for awhile, we will call him D and he use to make me walk him to class a lot and talk to me a lot. I would consider us to be okayish friends, and one day when me and my friends including him were waiting for other friends to go eat, i got a call from a guyfriend and we just started to talk on the phone and D just took my phone and started to talk to my friend and hung up on him. And after that, D stop talking to me and got a girlfriend. I also helped out at the attendance office, so i would help him out from time to time but would only talk to me bout that.
So after summer, i try to talk to him, and i was playing around and pushed him and he just looked at me and didn't do anything, and i went to go get my picture taken with my friend and he was there and just looked at him walked away.
I feel like he's avoiding me, but i can't seem why he would or maybe i am just paranoid. Does anyone want to help me xD.?

[minjung_212]

A little question..

So I have recently a little scar on my top lip that is from dryness. It's not noticeable unless you really examine my lips. But i was talking to my friend and this guy that I know but not as well, and he pointed it out. What is he doing looking at my lips so closely???

[Daylightful]

how do you make friends if you don't attend University or TAFE (like uni um..but in a different environment) anymore?

because I only work now in a graphics office as an assistant and..sure I get a long with everyone, we go out sometimes to hang out but I have no clue where else to make friends considering I'm not in like..a social environment like a University..

any help?..

D'aw! Why not go out and go to little places around where you live? Libraries tend to have A LOT of clubs and activities going on, so go to one and ask what are all the events they are planning. Not only that, libraries may even know about other events going on outside the library. You can meet people from there, and ask the people you meet there about other things to meet even more people! You can also ask the people you work with to take you to places that have a bigger community or more people! -^___^-! It's kind of like networking around! Also check local places like stores and other little things to see what's going on! Ask to be invited to places OR you can even start your own gathering. Ask a friend at your work station to bring their friends and all go out for the movies or ice cream! Good luck~!

i have a quick issue i been dealing with.
So i had this friend, who we hung out for awhile, we will call him D and he use to make me walk him to class a lot and talk to me a lot. I would consider us to be okayish friends, and one day when me and my friends including him were waiting for other friends to go eat, i got a call from a guyfriend and we just started to talk on the phone and D just took my phone and started to talk to my friend and hung up on him. And after that, D stop talking to me and got a girlfriend. I also helped out at the attendance office, so i would help him out from time to time but would only talk to me bout that.
So after summer, i try to talk to him, and i was playing around and pushed him and he just looked at me and didn't do anything, and i went to go get my picture taken with my friend and he was there and just looked at him walked away.
I feel like he's avoiding me, but i can't seem why he would or maybe i am just paranoid. Does anyone want to help me xD.?

That is odd.. he may have a crush on you or liked you at one point. The way he acted with your guy friend show that he's jealous. It's odd that he's avoiding you, he should try and be more opening. I suggest you talking to him about it most definitely and try and patch things up! Ask him what's up and that you still want to be friends! Maybe he'll open up and tell you what the dealio is. But it could be that he's jealous... good luck to you! Try and talk to him calmly too. Don't do things that could push him away or not want to open up. Be sincere and don't put too much pressure on him!

A little question..

So I have recently a little scar on my top lip that is from dryness. It's not noticeable unless you really examine my lips. But i was talking to my friend and this guy that I know but not as well, and he pointed it out. What is he doing looking at my lips so closely???

Ooh! Some people when being talked to looks directly at the whole face.. that includes the lips. He could have been examining your face and then noticed your lips. People notice things on my face all the time. Like when you have a crumb on your chin, or some dry skin on the cheek and they say, "Oh! You have a crumb on your chin!" Which means they were looking at my chin. People pointed out that if you look hard enough I had a stain on my lip, and I once noticed a friend had a red spots on his lips.
So it could be just that. BUT, he could be looking at your lips and dreaming of kissing you, although there is a pretty decent chance that may not be the case either. Either way, is he showing other hints that he likes you? If he is, that could be it!

[ellopop]

*sighs*
well.. i go to an all girls school and i kindof have been crushing on this guy.. since the start of this year.
but since its like single sex schools and he goes to single sex too i think both of us have kinda like.. are not good in talking to the opp sex.
so like we used to talk a bit on webchat but now like he doesnt talk to me a lot.
i always try and get his attention everytime i see him but i dont know what to do.
i dont know him that well, its so hard to talk to him sometimes .
crushes