[ra123]

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[terrorist]

yep, in the real world.. a lot of people use you for money
it's very emotionally draining. so really becareful who you meet because it can affect the way you live.

edit -
to act ruthless is only going to hurt yourself
so be who you are. just be much more aware of the people you meet.

You can trust a few good friends, you should find these "good" friends.

My mother has a few friends she can financially depend on when things turn out like hell.

think about it, if everyone didn't trust nobody else.. wouldn't the world become a ruthless place? ( in most cases it's already pretty much ruthless)
that's why we have to be the opposite of what social norms are.

[Meenuh]

That's why I learned never to lend out money. Ever. I don't care who you are or how long i've known you but the answer is no. Plain and simple. Personally, I don't think that really good friends would put you in a situation where they owe you money. As a friend, I don't think i'd ever ask anyone to lend me money.

Anybody and everybody is capable of screwing you over. Even your own family. You just need to learn to have a little faith in the right people.

Oh ho ho ~ as a side note, you actually live in the same area as the "person" that I lent money to. Maybe you can be my muscle and go get it back for me. Lol.

[IwishIwasKOREAN]

Yes, it's true in the real world people tend to be more selfish, cold-heart, and would betray you if it meant better for them.

However, there are still people who still have their own morals and will still be the type of people you first assumed that others were like.

I think just be careful, get to know people more before you go out of your way for them, and see how they interact with other people besides you.

[Prot]

If it is a huge sum of money, always sign legal binding documents. Otherwise, as the saying goes, "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me." Gotta just give your trust to someone once (to reasonable extents) and should they break it, no more trust for them. Thats the way I do it.

[sushiwhore]

you know i feel the same way i used to trust people too easily and i guess that is where i got hurt =/ i've had problems making close freidns as i grow up becuase i fear they will use my secrets to backstab me =(


@_@ my true best freind and one of the only people i fully trust in is my bf...

=/ outside of my intermediate family of course

[taiji.]

it's really hard to find nice people these days. i no longer trust people easily and i have a hard time making "close friends" now. people are so shady it's not even funny. i do treat everyone nice initially but i have the "guilty until proven innocent" mentality when it comes to trusting them. i feel like i'm being taken advantage of financially even when i'm with some of my family members. you might say "hey, but they are your family. families can do that." but finding out at the end of the day, the only reason why they wanted to bring you somewhere was for you to pay for something, is not a nice feeling.. i'm starting to understand why some rich people get depressed and commit suicide.

[Temoin la Nuit]

Yeah.. absolutely true.

People you meet after you became an adult can't be trusted unless they've "proven themselves" somehow. When we were kids, we always put out our hearts to become friends with others, with no malice or hidden intent. That's why my closest friends are all from my childhood and college years, or people that I went through something with.

I have the same thing as people above, that I assume people are inherently untrustworthy until they proved that they are trustworthy.

Why? Well.. the loss from wrongly trusting someone is a lot worse than wrongly mistrusting someone.

[Pogichinoy]

I've always been an overtrusting person and have yet to be burnt, maybe I've been lucky, but I'm very careful so I won't get taken advantage of, i.e. I never lend large amounts of money to friends.

From my life experience, and not being burnt at all, I can sense what a person is like from the moment I meet them.

Jedi y0

[lovefool]

don't take in what people tell you for face value (besides your family)

[thewhereabouts]

Let me begin by saying that there will be more than one surprises along the way. It's true, people are selfish, vested only in their interest, and won't be the good natured people you envisioned them to be. You shouldn't have to be ruthless to fend these people off, as you're simply being a reaction to their output for the lack of better words. Just be who you are (which is a lot easier said than done). My take is that people are plentiful. Socialize with them all. Just because you're socializing in the real world doesn't necessary mean you have to get personal. You'll find the hidden "gems" once in a while..

In short, don't create a barrier as a defensive mechanism. It'll hurt you in the long run.

[iridescent]

I don't know... trust, I've never had, really. But it seems the older I get, and the more I throw myself into "the real world" (depending on your definition of it), the more good I find in people. It doesn't mean I'd lend money to them, necessarily (not that I have money to be lending int he first place), but the more time I spend with people I never expected to know, and the more I listen to the things they say, the more I realize the way they seem isn't the way they are at all. And that there's something innately good in everyone. or innately hurting in everyone, but even vulnerability stems from something achingly good?

I'm probably just being obnoxious. I don't know; I guess it's I don't think anyone would ever choose to be bad. If a person commits a bad deed, it's because something's wrong, or out of their hands... Hate the sin, not the sinner? I don't think it's okay at all that those people ripped you off financially, and I'm sincerely sorry for that and hope you are able to get back up on your feet again -- what i mean, i guess, is that it is lucky to have been able to lend that money in the first place. And this doesn't absolve them of what they did, but would anyone want to be in a position where they ended up taking someone else's money without paying it back?

While I think it is important to be really smart and keep yourself out of situations where you're apt to lose something, it's equally important to keep your mind open, if you don't want all the supposed bad of the world to pull all the liveliness right out of you. (I'm not saying this pointedly, or to you specifically. It's just something that has made life so much more worth living, for me at least, though I realize different people are motivated by different things.)

[private]

yep, in the real world.. a lot of people use you for money

So true peoples nowadays just use people for money. As we getting older it's hard to trust people in this world.

[chinkboye22]

don't be ruthless, like ppl are saying be yourself, be stronger! be more aware! be a smarter person and be more assertive..i don't even my closest friends with somethings, humans are humans, only a few ppl are naturally nice and well rounded with high morals and such

this is the real world, be more careful, and take care of yourself

[be_mellow]

All I can say is, a lesson can be learned. I can't say I don't trust anyone but myself, but I keep an invisible wall and know my limits. I don't like to disclose much about myself. I tend to bottle up a lot, it can be good or bad. But I have close friends who I trust over the years and told me, it's ok to tell them and that I could trust them and I believe that.
I've been taken advantage of before and learned my lesson. I just move on from there. Know when a No means a No. I can't be soft hearted all the time. When too much chances has been given and the person doesn't change, then call it a game over. You have to be cruel sometimes. Chances are always there, it's the other person who never took advantage of it and then well, that's when it's too late for him/her to regret.

[Born: 1985]

Yeah in the "real world" it's basically 'everyone for themselves'.....for sure. Especially with the current econ situation...you have to really fend for yourself, your job and life.

[HappyExpress]

people can easily abuse trust....

how one can be used for each others benefit.

Manipulate each other for their own benefit. That's what people do it in the real world. I see it everywhere.

[missakky]

yeah the real world is harsh but i still go with the mentality of treating everyone with respect. i might not trust them but i won't use them either

[phoenix rise]

theres good people and bad people. don't let the bad people change the goodness in you.

[livingdeaddoll]

as much as it isn't you, i think it is essential to have the ruthless mentality in the workplace.
never trust anyone because you don't know when someone's going to stab you in the back so he can get ahead.
i'm not saying close yourself off completely, but these people you meet cannot be trusted with your secrets. not even the smallest, most trivial secret because they might sell you out if they can gain from it. i used to trust people in my workplace easily, kinda like how i do in school, but then i realised that i was being taken for a fool because of my naivete.

i think at the end of the day we have to try to protect ourselves because no one's gonna watch out for us. we're responsible for ourselves.