[uchung89]

admin please close this topic
thank you

[Tuxedomask]

Okay whew where to start. I'm sort of in the same boat as this guy, but sort of not. Before I moved 1200 miles away my girlfriend and I had been dating for 2 and a half years. We talked about it before I moved and we both agreed that it was for our best interest that I moved to start my career over here in the states. I've been here in the states for about 2 years now and it's getting harder and harder everyday. Basically I fly to visit her and my family once or twice every 2 months but it's still not enough. It's really hard. The most messed up thing is I think I'll be expanding my business to China so we're really at a tough point in our relationship. See...his situation is sort of like mine lol.

To be honest with your situation it doesn't look good. I know you're depressed and stressed over this but if he's not letting you in and telling you how he really feels it's hard. He's moving on with his life and it's not fair for him to hold you back on yours. I know...I know it's different because he was given an opportunity and he took it, but he should have been more clear to you about it. I'd say to follow your heart and question him about it. You said he'd be gone for 4 months and when he comes back what next? China? Does that seem fair to you to have to wait for him for 4 months for him to finally make a decision about his future which sort of concerns you.

My advice is keep yourself open to opportunities that may arise. Don't hold yourself back for him because it doesn't seem like he is. You said it yourself that some days he doesn't even call or text message you. Usually I text my girlfriend at least once or twice to let her know what I'm doing and to see how she's feeling. I know you're not his girlfriend but still you both had something for each other. If he denies it than you he doesn't deserve you're thoughts or feelings.

Talk to him ASAP and don't hold yourself back for no one unless you're certain they would do the same for you.

[spixder]

I love it when people say "Go with the flow", it means that they are just running away from the problem.

With regards to your scenario, if u like him that much go do your best to make him stay, go against the flow.

Imo i say just ditch him, gather all your memories of him, put them into a metal tin and burn it, this is also considered to be going against the flow.

[tusoo]

i THINK...that maybe he does like you, but he isnt doing anything about it because he doesnt want to hurt you. i mean, he could be going to china, and thats like a whole ocean away! if he was to get into a relationship with you, imagine what kind of relationship that would be when you're in the states and he's in asia. long distance relationships dont tend to work. in the short-term, yea, but long-term, that requires ALOT of commitment. and i dont think you guys have that, cos you guys are only just beginning. you havent known him for long.
i think you should just make the most of it. whatever is happening now, take it and cherish it. dont push him into anything, cos in the end, its gonna be both of you hurting cos it didnt work out. of course there will be the "what if" questions. but ignore them. they will only worsen matters.
stop clinging onto him. stop and imagine who difficult this might be for him. he is the one who in the end will be making the decision whether to leave or not. leave that up to him
like i sed, sit back and enjoy what you have now with him.
good luck