I think its so funny when the person you break up with says that its entirely your fault the relationship ended. Apparently he never realized how f***ing annoying he was being. Of course, moving in together was a huge mistake, and inevitably was what ended out relationship. He refused to be cleanily, and would not pick up after himself. Not only that but apprently no one ever taught him that when you have NICE stuff, you treat it NICE. Oh, and when someone is letting you borrow something for your benefit, you DON'T TRASH IT! @_@ What I hate is continuing to have feelings for the other person. I guess thats because I KNOW we would have been happy had we never lived together. Our views on how our spaces should be managed are totally different. I mean yea, when you leave s**t out all the time and you treat my stuff, and the stuff my family has given us to use like s**t, I'm going to get angry.
There were times he told me he was acting "defiant" beause he didn't like me telling him to pick after himself. First off, you act defiantly when you're like five to your mom. Excuse me, your HOW old now, and I am NOT your mom! I shouldnt be being put in a situation where I had to act as one. I like how he says I've changed to much for him to still love me, when he doesn't realize how much he himself has changed! I don't know..its frustrating. I'm being left to pay MOST of the rent now which is hecka expensive. Whatever, I only have to do it until July.I think that if he would agree to a second chance (of course this is with him NOT living here), it would work out. I doubt he'd say yes though. I asked him the first time he said he wanted to break up and he said no, he didn't want to put any effort into having a relationship. Doesn't he realize that ANY relationship, whether it be between a girlfriend boyfriend, or a friend or even a parent, that relationships take SOME effort? O_O I mean really...
Anyways, its hard getting use to him not being here. I still can't figure out if its just that it feels like something is missing because he takes up space, or if its that I actually miss him. I mean, I know I MISS him...or at least the him I knew before we moved in together...but do I miss him BEING here?
* So confusing...Anyways, I think that's all I have to say right now. Hopefully I'll be able to figure out something later.Any thoughts on what I should do? If I should do ANYTHING? Any advice of any kind? @_@
