[kissAndRUN]

Is it only me, or do a lot of people feel that they come off as "cold" either when theyre meeting new people or just like talking to a guy they like or something

Like for example..
I want to meet new people and make new friends, but when people I dont know that well talk to me, I get really shy and talk really quietly and look away.
I mean, I dont want to, but I'm just really shy and self-conscious and I feel that I tend to do that with a lot of people...which leads to them probably thinking that I'm not interested in them and so they just tend to stop talking to me after that when I really want to get to know them better

An example would be my crush.. :S
Sometimes when I see him or I just pass him in the hallway, I wanna wave to him, but I get too shy and look away instead.
I mean, I feel really stupid cause he probably thinks I have no interest in him and now we dont talk to each other anymore..

Ugh, how can I stop this habit?
Its like my natural instinct..
I dont want people to think that I dont like them or something..

[naoto]

Yeahhh this girl I like, I wonder if she is being cold because she is shy or really no interest. Nervous, it makes you react cold even though you don't mean to. You just get so caught up in acting properly so you don't give off the friendly emotion. It's hard to explain, I've done it too. Nothing you can do, BUT you have to let him know. You have to hint.

[FallenSkies]

Omg I feel the exact same way as you do.

It's not like i don't want to talk to people, but im just so shy that when i'm around people i don't know i just tend not to talk at all, or when i do i speak very quietly and speak only when spoken to, with super short responses. I'm usually very loud and hyper around my friends but when it's with strangers i clam up and don't know what to say. My friend once told me that when she first met me (although i have no recollection of this it might be true) that i spoke very quietly to her and looked to the ground. ><

Yeah, it's a really annoying habit of mine. I need to learn to be more extroverted among people i don't know.

[,astrolicious]

I was like that too and I know a couple of people who are like that.
At first it was hard getting to know them, but once I did (And I have no idea how...)
They turned out to be super hyper active and really awesome to be around : )

Hahaha. Hmm.

Well I think you need to figure out WHY you react like that and address it.
I know I used to be shy because I was always afraid of saying something wrong or whatever
But I guess I gave up on that thinking "oh what the heck" and I just start saying a lot of random things
Either they become my friends or they're weirded out.
Heck, it was worth the shot though : ) And people who tend to be worth your time will react positively too ; )

Just don't forget you're an awesome person and really, what's there to fear or be shy of?
SMILE : D <-- like that haahaa

Be positive. Confidence is beautiful ; )
good luck =]

[kissAndRUN]

I was like that too and I know a couple of people who are like that.
At first it was hard getting to know them, but once I did (And I have no idea how...)
They turned out to be super hyper active and really awesome to be around : )

Hahaha. Hmm.

Well I think you need to figure out WHY you react like that and address it.
I know I used to be shy because I was always afraid of saying something wrong or whatever
But I guess I gave up on that thinking "oh what the heck" and I just start saying a lot of random things
Either they become my friends or they're weirded out.
Heck, it was worth the shot though : ) And people who tend to be worth your time will react positively too ; )

Just don't forget you're an awesome person and really, what's there to fear or be shy of?
SMILE : D <-- like that haahaa

Be positive. Confidence is beautiful ; )
good luck =]

I'm not sure, I think I act like that because I dont want to embarrass myself..and I'm really self-consious, like appearance and all x.x

[angels.disguise]

i come off as cold, mean, snobby, or a pinkberry.
but its because i dont talk much to people i dont know.

best way to get over it is
to initiate the conversation first
& let them know your a really awesome person

[touchthesky]

im the same way. im too worried and conscious about my appearance.
my friend told me how this guy who i don't even know & never seen before told her that i look really cold and bean pie -__- im pretty sure most people who dont know me think that lol

but i think im improving. i used to be really nervous in front of good looking people (both boys and girls) and now i just treat them all the same. i just talk like how i would talk to my friends and not worry about saying weird things or w/e. cuz usually they end up laughing anyway and the convo just goes on.

just relax and dont think too much

[damyoungji]

I am shy around most people. One of my ex-best friends said that when she first got to know me, she thought I was cold and an introvert. As for a friend of mines, my other friend told me that when he met me, he thought I was weird because I was not talkative. Even until this day, I don't talk much around that group. We get along, but our interests are different and I'm not loud and outspoken like they are. Sometimes I hate it a lot since it prevents me from getting to know people, or have others not invite me to things since I am not loud and crazy like most people.

[heheimawesome]

LOL yeah.. its like that for me too. especially with the girl i like its ENHANCED
with people i dont know when im alone even if they talk i dont know what to talk about and i get really quiet
i USED to be able to talk to strangers regardless but people told me i talked too much then i went through some stuff in my life where i was in a place for a few years where i didn't want to make any enemies and yeah.. ultimately lead down to being very introverted around people i dont know.

but when im with people i know and im completely comfortable im extremely friendly but when i dont know them im quiet.. and when its the girl i like im SUPER SUPER quiet because i dont want to look like an idiot infront of her...
it's not good. i need to fix it but its so hard my mind just goes blank hahahaha

[영원한 사랑]

I'm naturally quiet and a bit cold so it does prevent me from getting closer to people. I think its very difficult to change when its been with you for a long time and its your natural personality. But one thing I do know is that trying to initiate conversations with people whether or not you are comfortable with it gives people a friendly vibe, and then you will make friends because they think you are a nice person. That's one thing I figured out is that when you don't talk and you are not friendly, you intimidate people, so they don't want to talk to you. When you show you are at least a nice person, you will make friends.

[chrissyxjj]

i am EXACTLY like this.
haha im so "cold" towards anyone im interested in
and new people in general too

[forgottenmemories]

Yeah, I do that too. Apparently I come off really cold and snobby. I can't help it. A lot of my friends said before they know me, they said I come off as really b.itchy. I guess I give off that b.itch vibe too.

[iitzjesss]

omg! I have a friend just like that but she's nice...I remember we were so scared to start university and the two of us were being stupid practicing nice/ friendly expressions...and hers weren't that nice

[hannieoon]

I'm a shy person. My voice gets softer and I normally am not the first one to make conversation. When I walk to places, my friend always told me that I had this facial expression like "Don't eff with me" attitude in a way. I guess I intimidate people? Which is a bummer because... well...I'm pretty chill. Hahaha

[supa'Wanki]

I'm like that too!!! it sucks!! *starts to rant* asdsakdakljdkaslda

[kellyalster]

I know exactly how you feel. I'm so super shy that I took myself to my school counselor for some guidance. He didn't tell me to be more outgoing since this is my nature. Instead, he did gave me advice to help me change my way of thinking when I talk to people. He said:
1. Others will probably just as nervous as you are, even if they don't look it.
2. Conversations will always have to end. Even if it's a bad ending, try not to worry about it.
3. Don't look down on yourself before you even give yourself a chance to get out there.

He also gave me some methods for conducting a conversation:
1. Find a common interest. Say you want to talk to a classmate, talk about class. Even talk about your own interests like the last good movie you saw, because they might have the same interests.
2. To keep a conversation going, talk about them and ask them questions about themselves. Then they might feel that you care about getting to know them.
3. Avoid asking "yes/no" questions. Ask open-ended questions so that you can have a longer discussion.

I'm still very shy but his advice is comforting when I have to talk to people. I did make more friends after getting his guidance too. Public speaking was a little easier. I also found myself starting conversations with people I just met. Just the other day, I was at McDonald's. Without thinking, I told the cashier that I liked his tie in my quiet, mouse-like voice, and I asked him if it came with the whole uniform. We had a brief conversation about his uniform, then he told me that he liked my smile. Sorta made my day.

So I think if his advice helped me a little, it might help you a little too.

[elissayoo]

omgosh i jus experienced this a few weeks ago with my ex crush..
i was so shy and stuff that i culdnt be myself !
he got so anoyed that we just called out relationship off =(
now its so awkward at skool... we dont talk anymore.

dont make the same mistake as me..
im gona change my shy ways >_<
esp with the guy im meeting up with tomorrow

[xxxxxxx]

my shy problem is just like you! I really hate it. I was really shy with my crush too and I think he gave up on me because I always gave a "I don't care" vibe

I honestly wish i could help you but I can't even help myself. I'm a little more outgoing now but I still have a shy side . Just don't be shy, TALK! (:

[ANJEE<3]

yeah that's definately me..
i think that's definately turned some possible friends away

[한스 ㅋㅋ]

Just be like this guy ->
You can't tell if he's angry/cold/whatever. Coz he's smiling. He doesn't look sad. Or angry. Or Cold. Or on a period. Or whatever.

it's OK to be shy. but Its not ok if you are shy and not smile.