[Mannosuke]

It's not a matter of race, but a matter of how race is defined and what you attribute to the concept of race.

Since I couldn't think of the right word to summarize to some degree of accuracy what I'm trying to say, the closest term I could come up with was "interracial dating". I also enjoy writing long posts with no summaries for the sake of trolling.

This thread is not about "do you support interracial" nor is it about "what do you think of interracial," I don't care, do that on your own time.

In essence, let me draw an example to work with:

You're chatting with your friends about dating preferences and this one guy suddenly goes "I only date asian chicks"

Now, what comes to mind when you hear this statement? "Oh he's so close-minded", "oh he's bitter", "oh he only dates asian chicks." When you think about it, what exactly is someone trying to say when they only want white boys or asian girls or Siamese felines (not to leave out those that prefer cats over humans)?

The biggest issue that comes up is this whole "racism" thing, but that's not particularly relevant to this topic.

When a girl prefers white men (or if you prefer, "caucasian" men), is it necessarily true that it's BECAUSE he's caucasian? Similar, if a guy prefers asian women, is it simply because the girl's asian that he'll go for her? You always hear questions like "why do you only go for [ethnicity/race]" and the most popular answer you'll get is "preferences" which you immediately discard as ignorant bullcrap.

In an attempt to explain these so-called preferences to create any sort of stance that (I suppose, many of us here already take), I look at the concepts of "race" and use it to form my argument. In order to show that I can relate somehow, I personally only prefer chinese or korean women. Why? "preferences."

Now there will be those that will distinguish between "race" and "nationality" and "ethnicity" and I do acknowledge the fact that they are defined differently, but for convenience sake I'll just call everything "race" cause most people tend to use "interracial" incorrectly as well: an asian girl dating a white guy is NOT an interracial relationship. White is not a race. But you can believe that if it tickles your fancy cause that's how a lot of surveys and/or application forms seem to put it (black, white, latino, asian, pacific-islander, other (lol))

When I say "I prefer chinese women" (no, don't come up with a 'lololol yellow fever' response), what am I trying to say? No, I'm not going to blindly accept dates just cause she's chinese. No, I'm not going to assume she's better than anyone else just cause she's chinese.

In fact, how does someone even qualify to be "chinese" (or asian, or white, or black).

1: You have a chinese passport...yes.
2: You speak chinese...perhaps, but anyone can learn chinese, so why does matter.
3: You live the "chinese culture"...I guess, since living a culture is much different from reading about it, but anyone can live in china for 40 years and become accustomed to it. Especially if you're born there.
4: yu g0tz azn pryde yo. No, fail, don't come back again.
5: you LOOK chinese. What?

#5 is the most relevant point in this case. Yes, I prefer someone that physically attracts me (aka, my eyes like what they see), but who doesn't (duh, why am I even stating the obvious).

To the point about "race" and why I even decided to bring it up since no one likes to talk about it, it is exactly the problem here (and why some people call it "racist preference"). If I were to walk around the mall in some country heavily populated with various people from around the world, I will not see a girl you consider to be the typical blonde-hair-blue-eye caucasian and think "wow, what an attractive chinese girl."

Why not? She could've been born in china and educated there for 20 years of her life before moving here, but that doesn't matter cause I'm only speaking from what I see. Does it mean this white girl doesn't interest me because she's white? No, it's because her looks don't turn me on. Similar to what others say when they only date a certain race, the race doesn't matter, we are only interested in how the person actually looks. It's only unfortunate that, due to how society is constructed, that we must associate certain features with certain races, so when I say "chinese guy" you'll have some idea what the guy looks like.

Off-tangent, some people like to talk about culture to defend themselves (cause you know, you should be somewhat compatible and so should your families).

Do I assume I'm much more compatible with chinese women than any other woman (culture-clash, family conflict, for example)? No...that has nothing to do with my preferences as some people like to argue and neither should it ever be an argument used to defend yourself. It doesn't work and is full of flaws.

The other most common arguments that people make to attempt to justify their preferences are...actually I can't think of any. Someone help me out here.

We speak only in terms that you will find convenient and in no way does it imply that we're "close-minded", "ignorant", "bitter", or any other negative word you want to use.

[adiavoy]

No ethnicity/race related posts allowed...

Sorry, but your post just came off as rambling about things that have been discussed in the past, I also got confused many times. In conclusion, date who you want to date, prefer what you want to prefer, hey, no one's stopping you from dating a specific race...

[hannieoon]

As interesting as it may sound... this thread is going to shut down by the moderaters. Read the rules ^o^

[Mannosuke]

I did read the rules, but I'm amazed when people can post up anything related to race and sound "civilized" and not be banned, so I'm assuming there is fine-print written all over that I just can't see.

This thread qualifies as "civilized" so it's up to them which rules take priority. The content that were used to justify why such a perma-ban rule was put in place has very little to do with the content in this thread.

btw, since you brought it up, I'm going to make a topic about people throwing down the rules and posting in a topic that's clearly illegal. That SHOULD be ok

And yes, I did report my thread to save anyone else the trouble.

EDIT: oh, I noticed this wasn't a global announcement. Does that mean it's allowed anywhere else?

[nostalgiafades]

Lol. Rules are rules, but before the thread gets closed...

The physical self isn't everything, which unfortunately 99.9% of the population gets strung up on. In my opinion? All the glam and vanity sometimes has to get thrown out the window, so I don't think people need to justify why they are attracted to certain things.

It's just in their nature, whether right wrong or indifferent in a relative sense.

[OMGitzYOU]

btw, since you brought it up, I'm going to make a topic about people throwing down the rules and posting in a topic that's clearly illegal. That SHOULD be ok smile.gif

It won't be in the L&R thread. right?

[mrskimjinho]

While I agree that racial preference is partly a physical matter, I also think it has something to do with certain distinct behavioral traits that different races have. I know I'm probably gonna get some disagreement about this, but different races have different ideals of certain behaviors that seemed to be ingrained into them, i.e. how much physical contact is allowed, what is/is not acceptable on a first date, etc. I'm not saying that a certain race's men treat their women better than do men of another race. It's just that different races have different cultures that map out how they must behave around the opposite sex (or same sex, if that's the way they roll). I've read the blogs and such of women and men who have certain racial preferences when they date and a lot of them (especially the women) say things along the lines of "____ men move at such a respectful pace, they don't demand nearly as much physical contact as _____ men do." So yeah, once you look past the physical aspect of a person's racial preference, there are other justifications.

Regardless, different people have different justifications of their personal preferences. Justifications that may work for don't always work for everybody else. ...although I really don't understand why anyone needs to justify their personal preference to someone else.

Interesting thread. But regardless of how civilized a thread is, it's the uncivilized responses that'll close it.

[Mannosuke]

Overall, the point behind my initial essay-of-a-post was this (after some thinking over what I wrote):

It's not a matter of race, but a matter of how race is defined and what you attribute to the concept of race.

Not everyone agrees with the concept of race in general, but a lot of people don't seem to put much thought into what it means to be "asian" for example. People throw around comments like "I wish I were asian" or "my friends acts asian", but how do you "act" asian? These are basically qualities attributed to asians, and even though I believe it's common sense and requires very little thought (that race does not define who you are, but it's how you define race) it doesn't seem to be the case on these forums.

Indeed, preferences do not need any justification, but hey, it's better to have something to say than not in order to get the other side to refine their thoughts so not to believe that they're absolutely correct in judging you based on what you like.

The uncivilized responses are partly due to the fact that people don't wish to have anyone discuss it, thus they purposely throw crude remarks in order for the topic to disappear. It's not uncommon, just look at how society will act when someone of any sort of importance does something they disagree with: riot, mob, picket, what have you.

[choot]

HUH???? i was reading the top portion.........and then everything became a blur afterwards =X

i feel like this post is a dictionary or a blog. because i feel like you're talking to yourself more than us?