[Mannosuke]

1: When you TELL someone "I know how you feel" do you honestly believe that you KNOW how the person feels?
2: When someone TELLS you "I know how you feel", do you honestly believe that he/she KNOWS how you feel?

This phrase is used very often, both in good and bad ways.
Someone who's depressed will probably say "no one knows how I feel" and then you have dozens of bystanders criticizing him, saying "you really think no one knows how you feel?"

Talk about arrogance, which is ok, cause I consider myself to be the essence of arrogance.

On the other hand, someone may have gotten out of a 5-year relationship and feels sad, and then others try to comfort her with things like "I know how you feel". I mean, ya, you've also been through break-ups, so that's understandable.

[MangaPanda]

Only if I've been through a similar situation and vice versa. (: Maybe not entirely the same feeling because everyone deals with stuff differently but I do believe I can relate to them a little.

[tenken]

I only reserve that line when what they're going through is similar to what I really went through
Most of the time when ppl say that to me, it's just a way to continue a convo, out of politeness. They don't mean it.
shrug. move on. what else?

[HaplessChild]

Knowing how someone feels and feeling/ having felt what someone else feels are two different things. Normally, knowing what someone is feeling is common [emotional] sense.

[Mannosuke]

Knowing how someone feels and feeling/ having felt what someone else feels are two different things. Normally, knowing what someone is feeling is common [emotional] sense.

I disagree, the only way to "know" what a certain emotion is, is to know how it "feels".
Hence, you have to have felt it to actually know what it is.

Emotions are rather complex, and some people are satisfied with it's just a bunch of chemicals. lol I don't believe in that.

When someone loses a family member, I DON'T know how he feels.
When someone lost the finals, I DON'T know how she feels.
When someone has just gone through a horrible break-up from a 10 year relationship, I DON'T know how she feels.

EDIT: just flipped through this thread

When someone has no one to call a "real" friend, I DON'T know how he feels.

[Lie]

Often when people go through really down periods, I think they like to own their sorrow, and there's a sense of self pity which says, "I have it particularly bad." At which time they're open to sympathy ("I feel bad for you"), but not so open to empathy ("I'm with you on this, I know exactly how you feel"), because in a weird way that makes the sorrow seem less theirs if they have to share it with someone else.

On the other hand, sometimes when people go through really down periods the burden can feel like too much for them to bear, in which case sympathy from others seems hollow ("I feel bad for you," "But yeah, what're you doing to help me? Nothing"), but a bit of empathy ("I'm with you on this, I know exactly how you feel and I'll help you through it") can make all the difference in the world.

[twenty4k]

It sometimes depends on the situation. For example, if someone were clinically depressed, it's involves completely different feelings than someone who is just 'sad.' So if I were the clinically depressed person, I wouldn't honestly believe it when others told me they understood how I feel. But for common scenarios such as break ups I would probably believe it since a lot of people have been in one before.

[HaplessChild]

I disagree, the only way to "know" what a certain emotion is, is to know how it "feels".
Hence, you have to have felt it to actually know what it is.

Emotions are rather complex, and some people are satisfied with it's just a bunch of chemicals. lol I don't believe in that.

When someone loses a family member, I DON'T know how he feels.
When someone lost the finals, I DON'T know how she feels.
When someone has just gone through a horrible break-up from a 10 year relationship, I DON'T know how she feels.

EDIT: just flipped through this thread

When someone has no one to call a "real" friend, I DON'T know how he feels.

Emotions are [for the most part] very basic and everyone that's not completely insane has felt the most common emotions like sadness and happiness on some level/ at some point on the spectrum of that emotion.

From there it's a matter of taking that emotion you've felt before and multiplying it by a similar connection you already have. Again, you may not feel it but I you can say "yes, I know you are exceedingly sad/ happy."

[Mannosuke]

Emotions are [for the most part] very basic and everyone that's not completely insane has felt the most common emotions like sadness and happiness on some level/ at some point on the spectrum of that emotion.

From there it's a matter of taking that emotion you've felt before and multiplying it by a similar connection you already have. Again, you may not feel it but I you can say "yes, I know you are exceedingly sad/ happy."

I don't believe you can perform arithmetic operations on emotions. I might know how it feels to be happy (whatever that is), but I have no clue how it feels to be happy^2. Something that's twice as "happy" is probably a world of a difference.

It's like sex: guys probably would never understand how a girl feels.

[ParappaRappa]

well, when i say that, i mean that i think i've gone through what they're describing. like, i get it. but if i really dunno how they could feel, then i don't say i do. sometimes i even literally say "sorry, i can't understand how you feel because i've never been through something like that before." lol

[Floatii]

i don't say this line unless i've got plenty of idea of what the person is going through i can relate in that emotional sense.

when someone says that to me, it's usually not very believable. but there are times where i get the feeling that they really know what it feels like.

[juicejuice]

I only try to say it only if it happens to me before...but there are no 2 identical situations since everyone is uniquely different. I guess I can only say if the situations were similar...

I understand when you are in a long term relationship and it fails apart...and something like that you will step in a say it.

[hiswendy]

1: When you TELL someone "I know how you feel" do you honestly believe that you KNOW how the person feels? I never say it because normally, I honestly don't. Instead I say, "I don't know what to say... >< I'm sorry. I'll just be stupid now?"
2: When someone TELLS you "I know how you feel", do you honestly believe that he/she KNOWS how you feel? No, because chances are they really don't. I don't like when people say that to me.

[mintywinter]

1) I would only say it if I went through a very, very similar situation.
2) Rarely, because people usually toss off "I know how you feel" whenever they think it will make someone feel better. Not because they really have thought about it.

[bonjour tristesse.]

I don't believe in it. Sometimes they say it so they can sympathize or express pity. Others they think they know how we feel. They'll never know how something 'feels' for us unless they were us that very moment

[MAKEMESMILE.]

i believe that true understanding is impossible ,

therefor i don't tell anyone i do understand , because i don't ,
& when people tell me that they understand , i know that they can't.

like said above , no one can understand unless you we're them at that very moment.

[agnuque]

1. Yes, because I don't say things I don't mean. Sometimes, all people need is the thought that they're not alone. That somebody else feels the same way for them to reach out to each other, so yeah. I think when people say "You're not alone" in this or that, it can really help.

2. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. Depends on how a person says it. But most of the time, at first I'd be like "You don't know anything about how I feel!" but after a while, when I'm all settled down, I'm thankful that that person reached out and stuff, and then believe whatever he/she tells me.

[jang neul]

If someone else was to say that to me, I wouldn't know..
On the other hand, when I say that, it's only because I've been through that situation, in a very specific way, that is.
I wouldn't say "I know how you feel" to someone who got dumped by her boyfriend just because I've been dumped myself, because I believe those are two very different things.

[Cao]

I know how you feel buddy.

[[HyuNi]]

I don't say this, ever.
Even if I went through the same thing, I never say it becuase I really don't know how that person feels.

Most of the time, when people are complaining or sad and talking about their problems, they aren't looking for a solution. 9.5/10 times, they just need someone to listen to them.

But on the rare occassions, I do give some feedback, I say "I don't know exactly how you feel, but I went through a similar situation and this is what I did ..."