[desertrose1290]

I don't really understand.. Or part of me does, but it's still so so upsetting. She knows I'm a nice person and thinks I'm a great influence on him, and she always says so to her friends and everything. But because he's at a college far from me, she wants him to date other girls.

She told him to do so a year ago, when he first left, but we ended up staying together. And even now, after having gone through a year of long distance, she still wants him to date other girls. Why won't she stop pressuring him to do so? And why does she want him to date other girls so badly if she likes me?

edit: Thanks guyss, I do understand that we're young and we shouldn't settle down so quickly, but I feel as though if we aren't going to work out.. then we should fall apart when we do. It's not like he won't have time to find another girl if that does happen, I would think..

Or not even that.. But I'm not sure. I understand her reasoning for wanting him to date other girls, but it just makes us both unhappy for her to say that. I don't really see anyone listening to their parents when they're pressured like that.. And it's just a bit hurtful to know :[

[Mannosuke]

You should ask her. If she likes you, she'll tell you.

[peppermintsugar]

I went through this almost exact same thing with my first serious boyfriend. I was 18-19, he was 19-20. His parents liked me, thought I was nice and all of that, but his father didn't want him in a serious relationship yet. Said he was too young and he should be dating around still, not settling down yet.

Sounds like the same situation.

[parkundO!]

she just wants her son to have experience with different girls...just don't want her son to define a girl according to just you.

[brownman90561495]

I don't really understand.. Or part of me does, but it's still so so upsetting. She knows I'm a nice person and thinks I'm a great influence on him, and she always says so to her friends and everything. But because he's at a college far from me, she wants him to date other girls.

She told him to do so a year ago, when he first left, but we ended up staying together. And even now, after having gone through a year of long distance, she still wants him to date other girls. Why won't she stop pressuring him to do so? And why does she want him to date other girls so badly if she likes me?

but that doesn't mean his mom doesn't like you to be his GF in the future. it may just mean his mom doesn't want him to be alone while you too are away and let just time tell if you two are going to be together again soon after college.

i know it's kinda twisted. lol.

[joxxy]

Maybe she thinks it's best for her son to date around to see what's out there before settling down.
Try seeing it from her perspective - having a young son in college in a serious relationship with a nice girl which COULD go on and eventually turn into marriage, but she probably doesn't want him to settle down so soon and regret it later on in life.

I don't think it's anything personal against you - she just wants what she thinks is best for her son.

[~Usagi~]

maybe her past experience gave her the impression that long distant relationships won't work...

[PRRRETTYGLiTTERRR]

Usually long distance relationships dont work out well so I can see her point but I wonder why too b/c my boyfriend and I are like 1000x miles away at different colleges but we make it work & his mom really likes me and doesnt care how far apart we are as long as we remain faithful & concentrate on our studies.. gluck with that! try not to let it get to you as much & if your bf is willing to maintain the relationship then you shoulkd be fine

[faithpuppy]

Well according to my chaplain, he said before that guys would go on dates with many girls... like that's the meaning of 'dating'... they aren't actually 'going steady' with one girl. Maybe that's what his mom might be thinking??

[STAR_x.]

maybe she wants you to be her goddaughter cause she likes you so much and you're like the daughter she never had? and since she wants you as her goddaughter, she think its socially unacceptable for you two to date? o_o sorry .. this is coming from a drama that i just watched D: hahah.

[i13elieve]

i can totally understand. my bfs mom likes me too
but she feels im to young for him.
but as long as both of us are confident then the mom shouldnt matter.

[bonjour tristesse.]

It's always good to have your boyfriend's mom's support on the relationship but if she doesn't, remember one thing : She's not the one you're dating.

[MNLV27]

It's alright. As long as you two are strong enough to not let that affect your relationship then everything will be alright. In time she'll come to accept that he's serious with you.

My bf's parents wants him to date their pastors daughter but he's with me. My mom wants me to date other guys because he's far away but I'm still with him. We don't let our parents words affect us. You shouldn't either. And our parents like us too.