[_sarahhh]

So this upcoming March, I will be going on a trip with my art&humanities class to Europe as it's an annual thing for juniors and seniors in this program for our highschool. It's over spring break and I'll be gone for nine days and eight nights. What my problem is, is this...

My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and couple months and through this time, we've obviously gone through a lot of fights and good times. Most of our fights result from the inability to trust each other and bits of jealousy. I don't mean for my boyfriend to sound like a jerk but, I've caught him a few times texting these two girls that I had problems with (I learned that one had interest in him and the other was just ALWAYS talking to him which bothered me). If he was honest and open about it, it wouldn't have caught me by surprise or made me jump around with anger. The fact that he was hiding it from me made me suspicious and lose trust in him (not that anything resulted from the texting between him and the girls). He also has problems with me because I am apparently a flirt... which I must admit is true sometimes. All girls are, no? But anyways, how can I leave New York with peace in mind that he won't lose control with girls, college partying, and etc while I'm gone?

P.S. He's worried as well cause he thinks I'm gonna find some hot italian guy and marry him LOL... which isn't realistic at all.

[Phosphate]

There isnt a point in a relationship if you guys cant respect eachother.
With respect, trust is gained.

If he had something to hide he wouldn't let you see his phone.
However, he seems like the type to like the attention.
but then again you flirt around too? I find that wierd

But what ever.

Get a phone card and call him. Or go on msn.

[KimKTN]

I assume you haven't resolved the issue with your bf about those two girls, which is why you are still tormented??
But think about it - you must have guy friends that you text that he should be worrying about (since he called you flirt).

both sit down and bring up all the issues before you leave , you have to take his word for it or he wont take yours - only fair.

Besides you are not his mother -- can't watch over him 24/7 , you are going to be on a trip to have fun, he should have fun too ( but still being faithful i mean)

[nhimoshi]

This trip is for you to enjoy yourself! You shouldn't be caught up in your thoughts about what your boyfriend is going to do the whole time. You need to relax and just let your spring break vacation be the best. I'm not going to say anything about what you and your boyfriend should do since, I don't know either of you but if you both have been dating for longer than a year then I'm going to assume you both care for each other greatly.

[bonjour tristesse.]

It's not right that your very own boyfriend doesn't have trust in you. Have a serious heart to heart talk with him. It could be that he's just insecure ; that's how pretty you are, LMAO. He's scared that other guys might latch on to you.

[_sarahhh]

Well, my boyfriend is the jealous type. I guess this is just his personality because he's been like this with his ex-gf and me. Whenever a guy gives me the slightest attention, he'd get angry. So even if I am NOT flirting with a guy, he sees it that way. I guess we just have some issues to work out... ; But thank you guys for all the advice.

[Chi Shen]

He sounds like crap if you suspect he`s actually gonna go out there and party with girls.

If you honestly believe that he will, get rid of him.

[brownman90561495]

if you two really love each other, someday you'll just get tired of each other's jealousy trips and will just stick together no matter what.

[ladyb]

honestly, what's a relationship without trust?

[HaplessChild]

Either you trust him or you don't. Either he trusts you or he doesn't. There's no way to fix it. There is no way to stop doubt. You're both just going to have to deal with it and attempt to maintain good, clear, honest communication.

[swtfirefly]

^ Agreed. You should resolve any trust problems with him before you go to Europe. A relationship wouldn't be any good without trust and communication!

[itsannies]

You guys should sit down and talk to each other because trust is something that has to work both ways. If you want him to trust you, you have to trust him, and likewise. And he probably didn't tell you he was speaking to those girls because he knew you were going to get angry, and in order to avoid tension, he thought, not mentioning it would be the best route. I'm sure there are things you might have done, and didn't tell him in order to avoid fights and arguements. Step in his shoes and take a look from his perspective.

[plegend2007]

Trust is earned over a period of time and not just given.

If the both of you can't resolve this trust issue to the the both of your satisfactions, then there is no relationship.

If you want things to work out, then the both of you must come up with a compromise and work at it by building each others confidence about one another. Start all over and began earning each others trust one step at a time. The key to trust is communications, so there are no misunderstandings.

[huunie69]

I say.. bring him with you

[ponkie]

Uh, no, not all girls flirt when they already have a bf. You two should have a talk, trust is important in a relationship, if neither of you trust each other, then this relationship won't end well.