[wendaYYY]

OK, this isn't to make me sound like a massive egocentric, conceited and arrogant bi@tch < although having said that, I now sound stuck-up

I just wish to put this out there in the open for general perusal and consideration..

How exactly do you respond when you know that you are being "checked out"?

SCENARIO A:
I'm wearing a glittery black blouse, tights and heels, and I've got my hair up in my bun. It's not particularly eye-catching by my standards. HOWEVER, I am walking through a carpark, and in my peripheral frame, I can see a guy standing by his Lexus LOOKING AT ME.
Guy is somewhat hot I must admit. I think he's filo and into break from what I observe. HOWEVER, I am not interested, because pinoys just aren't my thing.

I brave a brief glance at him to ascertain whether or not he is looking at me.
INDEED HE IS.
Not only is it him, his 2 other friends are also looking at me, literally glueing their eyes on me.

Intimidated? Yes I am.

SCENARIO B:
I am walking home along a main road. I had been to a lecture that morning, and was dressed in "going-out" attire.
I have on a plain grey top lined with insy-tinsy sequins and a boring black skirt with tights on.

I get hooted at and horned at. By 3 cars.

WTF?

I'm not making any implications of my being "attractive" because I know I am the contrary.

But does anyone else out there get the same, should I say, attention?

postscript: I didn't know where to put this, but I figured it fitted under the category of human relationships

[KanyeWEST]

all i got from this thread was,

"LOOK AT ME IM SO PRETTY THAT PEOPLE HONK AT ME. WTFFF"

guys will check out girls, deal with it.

[Knee]

I'd love being honked at.

[peppermintsugar]

I usually just grill them back, give them a look like "you wish."

[* veenee]

just take it as a compliment and continue walking.

usually i just say 'thank you; or smile if that happens.

as long as its not scary or bad to the point the guy drives the car up to you and tries to seduce you, or mistaken you as a hooker

[yimster900]

I think you'll find wherever you are and whatever time it is, guy's will do that. You see yourself in a 'boring skirt' but they'll see it as 'mama those are hot damn legs'.

[-One-]

lol its the same with girls oogling guys
instead guys would prob be wearing just casual then girls would see it as "Ooh! seXAY! meeoww!!"

[x-rays-r-b-yu-t-ful]

ugh. i'm starting to think the muslim concept of ' like wrapping up candy from wonton eyes' is quite valid.

if you don't like the attention, then don't dress for the attention. it may not be intentional, but what other purpose is there for looking good?
whatever it is, ultimately it's for the opposite sex. and to compete with others for the opp. sex. isn't it?

next time you take a look at 'fashionable' stuff, just think of how similar it is to women in underwear/night gowns. loose, small, provocative.

and make up. why? seriously, why? i've always thought of it as a tool of seduction/deception.

of course, a typical girl would throw off my paranoia/cynicism with her naivety of what she's really doing to herself. "it's not like that" "everyone does it" "it's harmless fun"

and if you were implying a man's fault, then i won't deny participation in such an act.
but really, those guys who see a female like that is thinking "she wants the attention, she's asking for it."

but eh. i ain't saying women shouldn't dress up. it's the little girls shouldn't. i don't have anything against people cos of their age.
it's not cos they're young, it's cos they're usually stupid.
so don't go parading around thinking you're mature by dressing like a 'woman'/what you see shaking their booty on mtv pressing her body against other women. seriously, i wonder if females on this generation/fashion era actually know what prostitutes look like anymore. they dress like they do cos of one reason - for a man's eyes.

egh. rants. i suppose i'm as far as killing the mood goes for the rest of this thread. everyone else feel free to balance it out in a young woman's folie a deux, where looking 'good' is absolutely aesthetic fashionable fun.
anyone think there'd be fashion if men didn't exist?

[joogrlpekaun]

^ I do agree that some outfits make it almost certain a gal will be checked out and that it's common to dress up to attract the opposite sex, but actually, a lot of women's fashion really is more to impress other women, which explains why many girls and women will insist on wearing the outfits they and their friends think are oh-so-cute even when the males around them think they're eyesores and not worth the money. Women are much more critical and appreciative of the finer details of each other's outfits than men are, on average.

I've noticed, too, that I get stared at much more when I'm dressed for work than when I'm dressed in my streetwear. My work clothes are not very provocative at all (no skirts or dresses, nothing at all revealing, no loud colors, you get the picture) and are intended purely to look more professional than a t-shirt and jeans, not at all to attract men, but it felt like running the staring gauntlet past my male neighbors every morning when I left for work and every evening when I came back. They stood around outside in groups and stared incredibly openly to the point that their heads followed me from a 90 degree angle in one direction to a 90 degree direction in the other, and I'm not even very attractive. It's not flattering, it feels more like prey being watched by predators or a moving slab of meat being evaluated by a butcher for its cut. You know, women definitely do check out men, but I don't see women routinely being that blatant and unabashed about it as if it weren't rude to stare at people like that regardless of gender. They also don't do it to most men regardless of how they're dressed, only a select few who are actually attractive.

Also, the concept of covering up the temptation seems logical, but check out this article and you will see that it apparently does not stop men from routinely treating women like sexual objects when they're just going about their everyday business.

[orgasmiq.]

I love how u went into really detailed descriptions rofl.
What does the guy driving a lexus and breaking have to do anything with it =/

[Flicksityy]

Don't feel special, I get honked at when I wear revealing clothes; I'm pretty ugly. I advise you to take it as an insult; I've seen old ladies wearing revealing clothes being honked at. It's just a plus that you're young.

[whenaicu]

Obviously you'd check them out aswell.
You seem to like it so why not. Just smile back at them.

[witchery]

Sometimes guys in cars honk at you when they're driving from behind you. So it doesn't matter what your face looks like to be honk-worthy....as long as you have a$$ and legs.

[5.mystline]

Shouldn't you be appreciative that guys are recognizing you?, better than not being ogled at all.

[joogrlpekaun]

Pretty much (referring to Flicksityy and meow.). It's BS when guys say "You should always just feel flattered by the attention" because the people doing it don't even have to really find you attractive to decide to honk, whistle, stare or whatever. And look at the case of the Egyptian women in the article: how is it flattering when men harass you even if they can't entirely tell what you look like? It's not flattering or anything to be appreciative of in the majority of cases, it's just a nuisance and a stupid power trip for the man. Do men have to be honked or really really blatantly stared at all the time to know that some women appreciate them? No.

I'm not saying it's wrong to ever check out women, but if you think that undressing random women with your eyes and not caring if they notice, honking, catcalling, whistling, etc. will make most women feel better about themselves and appreciative when they're just trying to go do whatever they need to do, you're mistaken. I'd like to know how the men who think women should be flattered by it would feel if they actually experienced it all the time themselves.

[colours]

all i got from this thread was,

"LOOK AT ME IM SO PRETTY THAT PEOPLE HONK AT ME. WTFFF"

guys will check out girls, deal with it.

crudely straightforward but true.
men have eyes. they look.

[rachilde]

It happens to all women. It's not just you. And, most of the time, it's not even about physical beauty so much as men being bored and trying to chase tail (you will be utterly and completely surprised by how many tragic legal cases we read in law school that start with men trying to chase tail). I get stared at and honked at all the time and everywhere. And, apparently, it's not even about getting with a girl. I was once walking with my then boyfriend when a guy drove down the street screaming, "I'd do your pinkberry" to my boyfriend. I'm not sure why men are wired to do this but they are and it's just a fact of life. If you possess a vagina, you will be stared at by men. It's really nothing to freak out or boast about.

I am, in general, a very dressy person anyhow so I've yet to see the distinction between casual and dressy clothing and honking/checking out; however, I have found that just as many cars honk at me when I'm in my workout clothes as when I'm in non-workout clothes. Again, I think it's just a 'dogs chase cars' situation. Dogs don't differentiate between a PT Cruiser and a Honda Civic. The chances are that if it is a car, dogs will chase. The same thing with men. Men are hardwired to chase and that's just that.

[gotkiet]

hey.... just because you say you look like a "egocentric, conceited and arrogant bi@tch"

and by the way you describe what your wearing, i'm sure your wearing that stuff so that you look good.

so of course if your gonna look good, people are gonna look at you.

its a good thing, not a bad thing. its life...

[joogrlpekaun]

It happens to all women. It's not just you. And, most of the time, it's not even about physical beauty so much as men being bored and trying to chase tail (you will be utterly and completely surprised by how many tragic legal cases we read in law school that start with men trying to chase tail). I get stared at and honked at all the time and everywhere. And, apparently, it's not even about getting with a girl. I was once walking with my then boyfriend when a guy drove down the street screaming, "I'd do your pinkberry" to my boyfriend. I'm not sure why men are wired to do this but they are and it's just a fact of life. If you possess a vagina, you will be stared at by men. It's really nothing to freak out or boast about.

I am, in general, a very dressy person anyhow so I've yet to see the distinction between casual and dressy clothing and honking/checking out; however, I have found that just as many cars honk at me when I'm in my workout clothes as when I'm in non-workout clothes. Again, I think it's just a 'dogs chase cars' situation. Dogs don't differentiate between a PT Cruiser and a Honda Civic. The chances are that if it is a car, dogs will chase. The same thing with men. Men are hardwired to chase and that's just that.

I don't know what your workout clothes are like, but most women I see or know wear clothes like shorts, tank tops, form fitting sweatpants or yoga pants, form fitting exercise jackets, and those sorts of things when they work out. They're not outfits designed to be sexually provocative, but they do tend to show what a woman's got. I get stared at more when I wear my workout clothes than I do when I'm walking down the street in the clothes I wear to class, too. A lot of men actually seem to especially like checking out women who are jogging or conspicuously on their way to or from the gym. The checking out does still happen to some extent no matter what I'm wearing (the "dogs chase cars" effect), but it does vary depending on what I'm wearing, whether my hair is up or down, those sorts of things.

[Kanzen]

It happens to all women. It's not just you. And, most of the time, it's not even about physical beauty so much as men being bored and trying to chase tail (you will be utterly and completely surprised by how many tragic legal cases we read in law school that start with men trying to chase tail). I get stared at and honked at all the time and everywhere. And, apparently, it's not even about getting with a girl. I was once walking with my then boyfriend when a guy drove down the street screaming, "I'd do your pinkberry" to my boyfriend. I'm not sure why men are wired to do this but they are and it's just a fact of life. If you possess a vagina, you will be stared at by men. It's really nothing to freak out or boast about.

I am, in general, a very dressy person anyhow so I've yet to see the distinction between casual and dressy clothing and honking/checking out; however, I have found that just as many cars honk at me when I'm in my workout clothes as when I'm in non-workout clothes. Again, I think it's just a 'dogs chase cars' situation. Dogs don't differentiate between a PT Cruiser and a Honda Civic. The chances are that if it is a car, dogs will chase. The same thing with men. Men are hardwired to chase and that's just that.

I agree with this. I get honked at, hit on, whistled at, no matter what I'm wearing, and no matter what direction I'm facing (half of the time my face isn't even visible). The same thing happens to pretty much every female I've talked to. I don't really see it as flattering unless it's by a really attractive man, and then it's only flattering if he's not skeezy about it. Don't take it to heart, really.