[Soonji]

I've seen some topics about falling out of love. I wanted your guys opinion about a specific matter to me.
Currently my thoughts wonder around and thinking about 'the single life'. This is really bothering me because i'm in a relationship for about 4 years now. Still more then often i think and somewhat wish I was single again. Not that i dislike the girl i'm with now but it's just that i start to notice more things I would like to see different in my partner. I still love her... but am I still in love?

I find this hard to adress to her... It's not something I can easily adress and talk it out... because it's going to be a cliff-hanger

Any advice?

[peppermintsugar]

This isn't something we can answer for you, I'm sure you know that, though. We can't feel exactly what you feel for her to tell you if you're still in love, and being in love probably feels differently for everyone anyways.
How old are you? If you're been in a relationship for four years it could be that you jumped into a serious relationship too early, and now you're missing the single life that most people have when they're younger.

[Soonji]

This isn't something we can answer for you, I'm sure you know that, though. We can't feel exactly what you feel for her to tell you if you're still in love, and being in love probably feels differently for everyone anyways.
How old are you? If you're been in a relationship for four years it could be that you jumped into a serious relationship too early, and now you're missing the single life that most people have when they're younger.

true... I sometimes wish i met her in a later stage of my life!

And of course i know you can't exacly tell me what to do i'd be a fool if i just did whatever someone wrote me on a forum to do with my 4 years of relationship. But still i'm trying to find anyone who can understand the things i'm feeling. Maybe give some advise on how they handeled it.

I appreciate your opinion. I think you did hit the right snare on the I jumped into something serious too fast. I'm currently 21.

[myxo]

true... I sometimes wish i met her in a later stage of my life!

And of course i know you can't exacly tell me what to do i'd be a fool if i just did whatever someone wrote me on a forum to do with my 4 years of relationship. But still i'm trying to find anyone who can understand the things i'm feeling. Maybe give some advise on how they handeled it.

I appreciate your opinion. I think you did hit the right snare on the I jumped into something serious too fast. I'm currently 21.

I wanted to bop the heck out of my ex when he told me that while we were dating. But hey, I'm glad he told me though because that one teeeny tiny sentence told me a LOT. I didn't realize he thought that about us, I had always been under the impression he loved me a lot and all this other shizniz but hearing that opened different windows of thoughts for me. What I'm trying to say is, right now ur so concentrated on just u. What about ur girl? Does she know this? Is she thinking the same? What if she was under the impression u both were still lost in love when fact is ur almost all out of love? A relationship isn't just about u and what u want. Talk to her about it. I know it's hard to talk about this sort of stuff, but who ever said it was supposed to be easy?

[Soonji]

I wanted to bop the heck out of my ex when he told me that while we were dating. But hey, I'm glad he told me though because that one teeeny tiny sentence told me a LOT. I didn't realize he thought that about us, I had always been under the impression he loved me a lot and all this other shizniz but hearing that opened different windows of thoughts for me. What I'm trying to say is, right now ur so concentrated on just u. What about ur girl? Does she know this? Is she thinking the same? What if she was under the impression u both were still lost in love when fact is ur almost all out of love? A relationship isn't just about u and what u want. Talk to her about it. I know it's hard to talk about this sort of stuff, but who ever said it was supposed to be easy?

It's not that i've kept this a secret from her! I've expressed my feelings subtle.. but then again, I dont want to hurt her and slap her in the face with this. I understand from your point of view that I might seem egoistic about this, but I can just say the things i'm feeling. I don't know what's going on in her head... and If she sees me as a life-long-partner. And Myxo, don't get me wrong, i'm not trying to become a playboy again and just fool around with sluts, nay! I just sometimes want that freedom back again.

[peppermintsugar]

true... I sometimes wish i met her in a later stage of my life!

And of course i know you can't exacly tell me what to do i'd be a fool if i just did whatever someone wrote me on a forum to do with my 4 years of relationship. But still i'm trying to find anyone who can understand the things i'm feeling. Maybe give some advise on how they handeled it.

I appreciate your opinion. I think you did hit the right snare on the I jumped into something serious too fast. I'm currently 21.

Yeah, I see what you mean, 21 is very young to have already been in a relationship with someone for four years, but that's all depending on you personally. Some people don't ever really desire experiencing that "single life" of parties, hooking up, casual dating, seeing what's out there, etc etc. I haven't partied very much in my lifetime, I fooled around a lot and made a lot of bad decisions, because of some of that I feel like the things I desire from a relationship now, as I'm 22, are things I should be looking for in a relationship years from now, maybe 25+, like I sped up my life from all of the stupid mini cooper I did lol.
However, if you DO want to experience the single life, and that doesn't necessarily have to be any of the things I mentioned, it's whatever you make of it, then you really have to think about what you want to do with that girlfriend. Do you think there's any way to get what you want out of the "single life" while still being with her? Some couples go to tons of parties together, drink, go to clubs every weekend, etc etc, and it fulfills what they want out of the single life while still in a relationship with their partner, BUT, if one of the things you're looking to do is casual dating, maybe even hooking up (just as an example, not saying that's what you wanna do haha), then I mean, of course it's not my place to tell you you should break up with your girlfriend, but yeah, you should probably start to really think about the possibility.

It's just the whole idea of figuring out where, if at all, your girlfriend fits in with your lifestyle, and the lifestyle you want to pursue.

[Soonji]

^lol do I sound like an bubble gum now... i feel terrible even thinking this way...

[JinEnjuce]

I've seen some topics about falling out of love. I wanted your guys opinion about a specific matter to me.
Currently my thoughts wonder around and thinking about 'the single life'. This is really bothering me because i'm in a relationship for about 4 years now. Still more then often i think and somewhat wish I was single again. Not that i dislike the girl i'm with now but it's just that i start to notice more things I would like to see different in my partner. I still love her... but am I still in love?

I find this hard to adress to her... It's not something I can easily adress and talk it out... because it's going to be a cliff-hanger

Any advice?

Tell me about your childhood. Specifically, your relationship with your parents. Seriously, this has everything to do with how people behave in relationships.

[peppermintsugar]

^lol do I sound like an bubble gum now... i feel terrible even thinking this way...

Well, I don't remember what "bubble gum" means in swear words LOL, but I assume you mean something negative, I don't think it's negative at all. It's unfortunate that you had to realize this so late into the relationship, but what are you going to do? Just stay in a relationship with someone when you aren't getting what you need? That's no way to live.

[Soonji]

Tell me about your childhood. Specifically, your relationship with your parents. Seriously, this has everything to do with how people behave in relationships.

Hmm that sounds interesting.. Come to think of it, my childhood was pretty rough.. My parents got divorced when i was young.. I was about 5 or 6. I did not see my mom for quite the while because she had some mental problems.. I haven´t seen her quite the while, but since my 18th i started visiting her again..! ^^

[tnn2000]

sry, nvm.......