[miumiuluv]

So I recently met this guy who is going to help me mod my car... and I found out that my boyfriend HATED him in high school and still does. He told me this guy is a a really big jerk and said a lot of mean things about him. I still stuck with my original plan and brought my car in for the guy to fix up since he was the only person I knew who could help me.

I randomly ran into him going into the gym one day and when I left, he was waiting at my car for me. We chatted for a bit, time flew by and it was already past midnight. I'm continuously meeting up with him here and there for the next few months or probably even years... I've came to realize he's really sweet, caring, understanding, and we have a lot in common. He is nothing like the jerk that my boyfriend described him as...

I know I shouldn't be liking him. I really tried not to but I can't help it. The thing is I have been with my boyfriend for a long time and we are in a committed relationship. I know I should choose my boyfriend over this guy but I can't seem to get rid of the crush that I have for him... I really don't want to like him and I feel very guilty... I love my boyfriend but I can't stop thinking about this guy ever since I met him...

I know I am being immature because I am not the type of girl who crushes easily or flirts with a lot of guys on purpose... Can anyone give me advice on how to get rid of this crush?

[Malice_Kaiser]

To keep it short. I have been in almost the exact. same. situation. as you.

For me it was just a phase. I had a feeling it would be. I waited it out and the crush went away. Honestly if I were you I would distance myself from this guy. Stick with your boyfriend. If you are committed and you really love him then that's who's worth it.

[theninthtrack]

If you know it's just a crush and you can suppress the feelings then I'd say stick with your boyfriend. A lot of times people break up with their someone because they have feelings for someone else, but in every long term relationship there are times when your heart wavers. But that does not mean that it stays like that. Often people realize how precious and special their relationship actually was after they've broken up and tried to begin something with someone else.

However, figure out your feelings first. Because it's actually unfair towards your boyfriend to be with him and at the same time have feelings for someone else. Right now, it might not be something serious yet, but there's a chance you might give in to your feelings and hurt your boyfriend even more by cheating on him.

If you choose for your boyfriend, then I'd say break it off with that guy.

[Meenuh]

Stop seeing him and stop talking to him will probably help.

[fredinsac]

The logical choice is to have them race their cars and the winner gets the pink slip to your heart.

[AnAngel]

Don't be so simple, do you really think monogamous relationships exist? Sure I guess some people can do it, but why would anyone want that? It's not encoded in our DNA.

You don't have to stick with your boyfriend just because it's the right thing to do, right and wrong are non-existent. Do as you will, but keep in mind that society is stupid and if you do go after this crush then you need to do so with cunning.

You're simply tired of your current boyfriend, how couldn't you? You're a live, it's basic science, be exposed to the same thing a lot of times and your sensitivity will slowly decrease. You're probably young too, why waste time being monogamous and doing what's "right"? Live wild and live free while you're young.

Go after the crush, satisfy your needs, then move on.

[HaplessChild]

To keep it short. I have been in almost the exact. same. situation. as you.

For me it was just a phase. I had a feeling it would be. I waited it out and the crush went away. Honestly if I were you I would distance myself from this guy. Stick with your boyfriend. If you are committed and you really love him then that's who's worth it.

FTW.

[lance]

Often people realize how precious and special their relationship actually was after they've broken up and tried to begin something with someone else.

Oh ive been through that myself, but being the idiot i was back then, I couldnt chose and ended up losing both...

as you've said this is a crush, it willphase away, hopefully, blahh and girls wonder why guys always keep their gf locked up, stuff like this happens...

[peppermintsugar]

So I recently met this guy who is going to help me mod my car... and I found out that my boyfriend HATED him in high school and still does. He told me this guy is a a really big jerk and said a lot of mean things about him. I still stuck with my original plan and brought my car in for the guy to fix up since he was the only person I knew who could help me.

I randomly ran into him going into the gym one day and when I left, he was waiting at my car for me. We chatted for a bit, time flew by and it was already past midnight. I'm continuously meeting up with him here and there for the next few months or probably even years... I've came to realize he's really sweet, caring, understanding, and we have a lot in common. He is nothing like the jerk that my boyfriend described him as...

I know I shouldn't be liking him. I really tried not to but I can't help it. The thing is I have been with my boyfriend for a long time and we are in a committed relationship. I know I should choose my boyfriend over this guy but I can't seem to get rid of the crush that I have for him... I really don't want to like him and I feel very guilty... I love my boyfriend but I can't stop thinking about this guy ever since I met him...

I know I am being immature because I am not the type of girl who crushes easily or flirts with a lot of guys on purpose... Can anyone give me advice on how to get rid of this crush?

No you didn't. You didn't try not to like him at all. If I was trying not to like a guy, I wouldn't continuously meet up with a guy that my boyfriend hates (and probably doesn't know about my meet ups with), talk with him well past midnight, etc etc.

Wanna get over this crush? Stop seeing the other guy. Women over complicate things so much for no reason. You put yourself in this situation and now you're wondering how this happened.

[mintcracker]

stop spending time with him
that's not exactly going to help with getting over your little crush
stick with your bf


don't leave sb you love for sb you like... you know that saying? Well it's true.

[miumiuluv]

The logical choice is to have them race their cars and the winner gets the pink slip to your heart.

Haha that's funny

-------------------------

Thanks for all the replies I really appreciate it!

[PhuongNguyen]

Feelings are hard to ignore, but you can definitely prevent you feelings from growing stronger if you really tried. Stop seeing the guy... it's not THAT hard, is it? It's not like you guys go to the same school or have the same class, you actually meet each other up to hang out.

Honestly... I find that when people say "I tried really hard", but yet their actions speaks otherwise... they're pretty much just trying saying it to justify themselves. If you tried really hard to stop liking him, why go and see him?

A lot of long term relationship go through something like this, and it's not too bad. However, if you realize that you have a crush on the guy, perhaps the wise thing to do would be to cut all ties until your feelings for him subside.

[miumiuluv]

No you didn't. You didn't try not to like him at all. If I was trying not to like a guy, I wouldn't continuously meet up with a guy that my boyfriend hates (and probably doesn't know about my meet ups with), talk with him well past midnight, etc etc.

Wanna get over this crush? Stop seeing the other guy. Women over complicate things so much for no reason. You put yourself in this situation and now you're wondering how this happened.

No, I didn't put myself in this situation. I went to see him solely for the purpose of getting my car done. It wasn't like I knew I was going to fall for him before going to see him. I'm not wondering how it happened as well. I know how it happened. I didn't just start crushing on him for no reason.

I'm seeing this guy because he's the only person I know who can help me out with my car. I'm getting it ready for HIN and I don't know anyone else who can do this for me.

[_ATELIER]

if you have second thoughts about ur bf, then that's saying something.

...maybe your bf isn't the one for you. you wouldn't be posting this thread if you were going to choose your bf.

[calculator]

You need to lose both of them or choose one, this is pretty sad.

[TechnoFibre]

Wow you clearly brought this on yourself. You shouldn't be spending that much time with another guy, especially one that your boyfriend hates.

You should just break up with your boyfriend if you're gonna keep playing stupid games like this. Why drag him along if you're mentally cheating on him.

[bona fide*]

No, I didn't put myself in this situation. I went to see him solely for the purpose of getting my car done.

I agree with PristineNyte, you did put yourself in this situation. How many times do you really need to meet with someone to discuss fixing a car? I'm pretty sure your conversations went further than that or else you wouldn't be having such feelings and this topic wouldn't exist. If you truly want to end this crush then avoid getting so personal with him, get the car issue resolved and move on.

[Malice_Kaiser]

Some people need to give the girl a break. This isn't something she should just break up with her boyfriend over.

[PhuongNguyen]

No, I didn't put myself in this situation. I went to see him solely for the purpose of getting my car done. It wasn't like I knew I was going to fall for him before going to see him. I'm not wondering how it happened as well. I know how it happened. I didn't just start crushing on him for no reason.

I'm seeing this guy because he's the only person I know who can help me out with my car. I'm getting it ready for HIN and I don't know anyone else who can do this for me.

You don't have to "see" someone to fix your car. Drop it off and go... call them and discuss it. There are VARIOUS ways to avoid meeting the guy and actually spending time with him. Heck, if the crush gets really bad, ditch the guy and just hire someone to fix your car.

I think you're making up excuses to justify seeing him. I call bs. I'm sorry but if you don't want to then you certainly will find a way NOT to. If you give a damn about your boyfriend then try to stop. Stop making up excuses.

Some people need to give the girl a break. This isn't something she should just break up with her boyfriend over.

It's certainly something that they would break up over if she let it continue.

[pinki]

all i hear is excuses ... its easy... just dont see him ... find someone else that can fix ur car, im prety sure there are other ppl who know how to fix a car ....