[mizmi]

i really want to change who i am and be more trusting and open
but i just can't no matter how much you want me to and how much i know you're right.

[Deafz]

I'm getting farther and farther away from you...
What can I do to change this?
*sigh*

[xxxxxxx]

complicated family issues regarding capabilities, money, acceptance, college, the good intentions, and the sacrifices.

[lido0LmisSundersto0D]

schools driving me nuts. and so is he. i hate being lost and feeling helpless

[stradivarius]

My parents said that if i earn my own money. I could spend what i want. And they don't want to bother.
Just y'dae, i was out and dad called screaming at me to go home and to save money and stop spending and don;t always go out with my bf.
They always assumed that I always go out with my bf. But at times, i was alone or with a gf.
what is it now.
they compare their old times and my time now about dating. Back then, they used to date once or twice a mth. And they want me to follow suit.
They say that I always go out with him when we only go out once on each week.
Talking about bf, parents always say to me to ask my bf to ask for my hand. I'm still 18 for godsake. I'm not even stable in anything yet. It's like they want to wash their hands off me. I feel so sad. It's not like Im 30 y/o.

I'm currently working and they treat me like as if, i was in high school. Not allowed to go home late. not allowed to stay over friends hse or even bbq- pit and chalet. I could do all those when I was in high school. But not now.
Spending wise, I keep buying stuffs for myself every week. And, I'm saving 130 bucks each mth and they asked me to save more. Come on. I'm not earning like what a big boss do. I'm turning 19 end of this yr. I still want to enjoy.

I wanted to go to college but they don't allow me cos they say that I would flung. They arn't even supportive. I still want to study. I have to pay for myself if i were to go to school. Most of my mates are schooling. Leading a good college life. I was lucky enough to get a job in a big company. Thank god.

Mom treated me a tad too unfairly. My mom would prepare breakfast for my lil bro and my dad. But not me. Even if she cooked fried rice, she would only cook for one person. No extras.
I would go to work with an empty stomach.
Whatever, my lil bro asked to cook, she would cook no matter how coplicated the recipe is. Where the food that I wanted to eat is easy to cook also, she didn't cook for me. I've been waiting for that food for 3 years.

And, in their eyes, I'm always in the wrong. Lazy, spendthrift, dirty.

Most of the stories that I wanted to share with her about work and school, she would show her "im not interested" face. And when I'm halfway done, she would talk about other things. I feel unimportant.

I told my bf about this. I know some things I'm wrong, but at times he would add salt to my wounds. It didn't make me feel any better.

That's a lot of ranting.
But I still feel the same.

[XJShinoda]

EXAMMMMMMMMM IS CRUSHING ME TO DEATHHHHHHHH!!! TT^TT

[this luallaby]

I think I made the worst decision of my life. I let him go.
Regret is the worst feeling in the world.

[__daanii.]

Realizing that everyone I ever thought I loved
never felt the same.

[hikaru105]

well, a close friend of mine recently broke up w/her bf and she's going out of control, ex: drinking more, partying, and making out w/random guys. i know she's a good person in and out, but this breakup is killing her. im trying to be a good friend and be there for her, but whenever i watch her do these things, it makes me feel sad for her, just b/c i had gone through it too, but not to that extreme. i wish she would stop and realize that she doesn't need all that and that she can be strong and do it, b/c if i was able to overcome so can her. just makes me sad to see her become what she is right now.

[Journal]

Someone like him had to go through heartbreak.
I never expected it, but I knew it would fit in to his character...
I wish he didn't have to go through it though.
In my eyes, he's a beautiful person and doesn't deserve to go through such pain.
I've never wished such good things for a person I barely even know, but really...
I pray that he finds a true lover. One who sees all the good things in him.
Someone who will believe in him, support him and be everything he ever wanted.
He deserves it all. And I hope for the very best for him.
Because he doesn't need a broken heart. Not someone like him.

[desertseatingoceans]

A co-worker of mine.. he completely breaks my heart. He really does. I don't know much about him but he's very quiet and nice. He does what he's told and doesn't complain. He keeps to himself and can be a bit stand offish. Since I've started working there, there has only been a few occasions where I've seen him smile, and those were at jokes from some of my co-workers. He isn't a bad looking guy either, quite cute. He walks around most of the time with somewhat of a depressed look on his face. The other day, I came down to the lounge after my shift and I found him sitting on the couch, staring at the floor. He looked so sad. My heart literally broke just seeing the expression on his face. I asked him if he was alright and he said that he was fine, without looking up at me, still looking at the floor. I really didn't know what to do.

I want to get to know him but he's not much of a talker... I also don't want him to feel like I'm pitying him either..

[Antz]

thinking about the time he looked up keratoconus when i told him i have it, and then he looked up depression... T___T can't believe he did that.. makes me love him more. <3


AND i have to do a freaking supp exam, GOD I WANTED TO CRY T__T

[Alicesan]

T__T
i feel like our relationship is slipping away.
he never talks to me.
always to the girl who he had a crush on a year ago.
and she had feelings for him too.
yet he 'loves' me.
everyone wanted them to get together, but he wanted me instead.
and they've been friends longer than we have.
i hate his stupid mind tricks.

i cant stand living like this anymore. its heartbreaking...

[greentea:vee xo]

I can't believe I let it happen last night ...




I feel so ashamed.

[jho]

I am half a world away from the love of my life. T_T

[Christinaisweird]

today my heart just dropped. i met this guy who looked exactly like this guy who i really liked than anyone can expect and he just looked exactly like him and it just hurts. in a few months will be two years since i liked that guy. and everywhere i go think that guy is everywhere. the guy at school that i like now i'm not sure why i like him. is it b/c i've replaced him with the other or just b/c i like him ?

[hikaru105]

I am half a world away from the love of my life. T_T

I know how u feel, well i use to know how u feel, but that breaks my heart too...

[xCrAzY4MiNwOox]

we can't see eachother much anymore =(

[lananhcali18]

I lied to this guy and I felt terrible about it.
Even though he said everything is kool but I know it's not.
Now I don't know what he thinks about me.

[x_applechan]

i dislike it when my s/o keeps thinking that i hate him, when i don't.
i don't want to cry my heart out - but i want him to know >_<