[Jacky_Knife]

So here we go.. The SI4 contest is under way. Alot of awesome singers and talent out there...
This forum..
Thats fine, thats okay. Let's fight na. Lets have a little fun.

This is for the vocalists and musicians who hadn't got a chance to shine all this time.
This is for the users who want to sing but are afraid to get up and give it a shot.
To the ones who've been humilated.
And finally to my new friends, lets sing our guts off and not worry about anything and everything.
thats why we're here isn't it? ~smiles~

DOGFIGHT - http://www.soundclick.com/bands/songInfo.c...;songID=4243442

CHORUS:
xACIDxHEADx - http://www.soundclick.com/acidshower

BACKING VOCALS:
rilani - http://www.soundclick.com/rilani
onigiri - http://www.soundclick.com/onigiri

MIXING:
mikeXc - http://www.soundclick.com/wompa

MAIN VOX:
Jacky_Knife - http://www.soundclick.com/fanatica

[onigiri_kun]

YES!
my turn to give a speech!
To command and conquer and see the new horizon
To go beyond the far distance and surpass oneself!
LOL! GIVE A SPEECH WHY DON'T YOU STUPID DASH!
hahahaha~
fun fun^__^ this project really got me to meet a few new
people! really nice adn different~

[hmaster]

I have to admit seeing this up I automatically have high expectations for this song. 1, it's a move song, and the main rapper is incredibly hard to emulate for all of us. It's unique. 2. Move's whole sound is unique, you can't emulate the rapper, nor yuri. And yet it's impossible to do this song in anyway other than M.O.V.E's, because move is one of those groups were songs such as these are undeniably moves. so if you cover one of these, you best be good at impersonations...

Well, it's loud. That's good. It's appropriately loud. A little bass heavy and grungy compared to the original, but that's okay.

and the main rapper's coming in....now.
too much reverb. you missed several syllables constantly, such as "biribiri" "abaren BOUNO body", and didn't stress in the right places. mispronounciation, as well. You know who you sound like? There was an initial D release called vocal battle, the one where all the initial D seiyuu got together to sing all the major songs. and you sound like iketani in "rage your dream (lover's remix)". a very good iketani. just as nasal, and far off the mic in this recording as that one. you dont' sound upfront enough, that makes you lose most of your "power."
"hakenai zenkou like a ryuusei" chorus effective, but messy.
"isshun no kagayaki demo kamawanai" that line easily stood out as the most incorrect one, because you held the kagayaki and not the "kama" section.
the last two lines also incorrect, again, missed syllables.
the last dogfight where everybody shouted was good...except massive clipping.
The saving grace of this song really is your chorus singer. she possesses massive ski-
god, the dogfight thing. too loud, too wrong. the dogfight line is meant to back up your chorus singer, not suddenly drown her out in clipping.
the bit right after the first chorus. the "haha" lacked emphasis, and the "yeaaah" insufficient force. again, incorrect pronounciation, so on and so forth. dont' be lazy and try and make up for mistakes with different timing in your delivery, it doesn't work, especially since I've listened to DOGFIGHT enough times. the "yo" was good.
don't relax yourself on that on that middle bit though, it sounds bad..keep the force, but lower the volume. that's rapping vocal control there.

jacky is obviously tired at his 3:00 time, he lacks force by the time he gets there.

and acidxhead is so pro. omfg.

jacky, you would have been better of sticking to the original lyrics instead of writing your own at the end. seriously. like i said, dogfight isnt' a song where you can introduce individual styles in a cover of it.

I couldnt' hear rilani in it.

so in conclusion -
jacky_knife's voice doesn't match the style, nor experience required in delivering something like dogfight's verses. skipped syllables, mispronounced and mis-delivered.
Both of you lacked stamina near the end of your verses.
Not enough rilani.

the bit where everyone came together. mixed messily.

your singer really carried this song, guys.

[fionashin]

>_>;; *done in the classic Hostess cake style* EY! WHERE'S TEH RILANI?!

Hahaha...but this wasn't really too bad. Your instrumental is way too loud and what's with the LOUDNESS when everyone said DOGFIGHT? ._. I'm going to lose my hearing eventually, no need to lose it any sooner than I gots to. The rapping was all right, didn't sound all that authentic since your Japanese pronounciation was...meh. But I agree with hmaster, Acid did really well with the song. ._. The problem I had was that you stated Rilani was a "guest" singer and I couldn't even hear her. *hmph*

Oh wait. yeah. the chorus singing girl sounded kind of bored and out of good. She was good technically, but emotionally, I just felt like she wasn't all there.

[Jacky_Knife]

Thank you, I guess. For that, hmaster.
So did you comment out of technicality or out of spite?

I'm glad you took the time to record sound clips and tell oni what was wrong with mine (our) performance in detail, maybe this Japanese will learn to speak Japanese a little better next time.

Im not gonna argue or whatever. Thats fine. I like to sing, we all like to sing. We had fun and I'm hoping others will enjoy this too.

But I'm not gonna accept this as anything short of an elitest/musician who needs to govern his rule by trying to nit-pick and dissect every little thing.

If you got a comment, thats great. Whether its bad or good thats fine. onstructive criticism, much appreciated. But writing a 'review' like this and posting it so everyone can see. All im seeing is a pylon trying to deter this thread.

Leave the essays for school and if you have anymore 'constructive criticism.' You know where to find me.

[fionashin]

._. You sound like such a...never mind, not going to say it. David is actually going out of his way to help you out and there you go biting his head off. >_>;; If David posted something that long on my thread, I'd really appreciate it and it wasn't just hmaster who felt that way, it was also me and I SHOULD KNOW wtf I'm talking about, considering that most of my b/g is in music.

[hmaster]

As the main rapper in this song, i suppose most of the comments would be focused on you. it seems obvious the the truth is, you left out words, mispronounced, so on and so forth. sure, you did this in fun, but your errors subtracted from my overall listening experience. I even told you where you went wrong.
of course, that's opposed to the "omg this was so good, rap more!"/"good job!" kind of thing you sometimes get going on here. excuse me for actually listening to this song from start to finish.
besides, I even said "no, it's not that you lack skills. it's just this song is not your style." hardly an insult, is it?
There is no elitism here. I approved very highly of onigiri's "find the way" when it wasn't a technically excellent song, because he'd captured the spirit of the song exceptionally well, for a male singer. or any singer, for that matter. If i truly was elitist, I'd post up my little first half of "dogfight" that I did a while back. and then I'd scoff at you.

I'm being very honest here, as far as I can see there were good points, there were bad points. by putting your song up, even though it is in the name of fun, you're still open to comment from other people.

I'm disappointed, because your other tracks showed you have some ability in this kind of thing, and here you lacked it. the difference between you and me, is even though we both have fun making tracks and doing whatever we do, I have more consideration for my listeners, in that it should be as good for them listening as my recording. Sure, I take extraordinary lengths to make sure that it matches to what an ideal song should sound like, and give my listeners a decent aural experience.

And if that's what you call elitism, so be it.

[Raix]

When it comes to Initial D. hmaster will have high expectations. He's not really the kind to make such a long post like that unless he really cares. And well, he does know what he's talking about. And if someone like Fionn agrees with him, he definitely knows what he's talking about.

Okay, to be honest. The start, the first line sounded like French O___o; like you said sacre something. Or maybe just because I've got French stuck in my head =___=

*cough*

Anyway. I think that you actually had the kind of voice to go with it. It was rough. But crud...That "dogfight!" scared me. The clipping is incredible. So glad I didn't have my headphones on.

xACIDxHEADx pwns. Enough said.

I kind of thought that the parts where all of you are together, excluding the dogfight is missing a bit of energy but that's just me.

Compared with the verses, the bridge is a bit...too soft I guess. The scream clipped a lot too.

And yeah, I thought it would've been better if you stuck to the original lyrics too.

*shrugs* Just my opinion. And btw, can't comment on pronounciation because I haven't listened to the original enough and I don't know a syllable of Japanese.

rofl, btw. Can I be your friend haha. I like making new friends ^^ I sound way scary .___.;

[LISTEN]

sing your heart out- accept or deny the critiques- but keep on keeping on guys. the volume control wasnt too bad actually, i wouldnt have noticed it. Since i dont know wtf you guys were singing about i wont say nething else. do your thing hello kitty.

HAHA yo i did not type that last hello kitty. it just did itself. how random

[onigiri_kun]

ok~ thankyou very much for your constructive critisism. but seriously, I don't consider this constructive anymore... yes we're flattered by your comment, but I don't think it's cool if you totally point out every subtle problem~ I honestly am pretty pissed.

[Sou]

I, personally, believe that, by posting here, you open yourself up to a myriad of critique options and styles. Most of us do this for fun, yes, but I think in order to improve, everyone has to hear the full spectrum of comments. People who deny critique constantly, and even argue it, are only putting themselves at a disadvantage, and come off as pompous, insecure, and bordering on attention whore territory.

Eventually, you learn to thicken your skin. In the world I come from, we reply to critique with a "thank you very much." Occasionally, clarification will be asked for. But you, as an artist, have the right to personally deny or accept critique. However, you should be appreciative that someone even took the time to go that in depth, or to offer you something more than "lol cute (:". You know your own strengths and weaknesses, right? And you should be confident enough in yourself to not get your doors rattled by a heavy critic.

Personally, I liked the track. Jacky, it's something a little different for you, but I liked your energy. Acidhead, your voice sounds absolutely beautiful and smooth, if a little lacking in conviction.

I barely heard Rilani and Onigiri in the mix. I think if you're gonna do harmonies with backup singers, you bring those out. Harmonies, when done well, are positively orgasmic and I would've loved to hear these.

Good job you guys. <3<3 Keep at it, yo. <3<3<3

[Jacky_Knife]

Tough skin... New skin... alright. ~smiles~

Thankyou everyone, for their comments a suggestions. No matter how riled up this gets it shows up out in the open, like a store display shining something out of a 'Nick Hornby' novel.

Let me tell you hmaster... I am wide open and I'm smiling.

I'm not apologizing and I'm not explaining myself or my friends actions.
Go ahead, comment. Give me something I can use to better myself..

But dont you dare try to boast your 'musical experience' and arrogance on me. Don't try to give me advice and than make 'subtle' remarks and 'vague' threats.

What do you call that?........ To hell with your 'approval'. I wasn't looking to be praised by you or devastated at your 'disappointment'. I don't care how good 'you' are to your listeners because right now their 'ours.' And thats all that matters..

I got nothing else to say to you, so don't even bother.


and now....

Thankyou very much everyone for listening. I wasn't suited for this song because I am not capable at rapping and I think that's what may have nulled the experience. Thank you for going through the trouble and commenting on our track. I hope the next time will be better than the last.

jack+

[SOJOONGHAE(:]

well im not japanese or chinese or whatever you guys were singing in. but when i listened to it i really liked it. it kinda had a 'whoa that was cool !! lets play it again!' . lol maybe its cause its the first time listening to this music but i thought it was ncie and it seemed you guys put alot of effort in it. i really liked the girl singing in it. it gave it a good vibe. cause i dont like this kind of music.. but when i listened to it i liked it since i kinda felt like different vibes like a taste of what you guys like to sing i liked it.

[Kyo Hanjin]

this song to me seemed really well done even though i didnt actually hear the real song, i really liked the rapper and the main vocalist Acid. she sounded like a real jpop singer. the rapper was really crude and rough and it sounded nice. i also heard a bit of oni, but then i was like where on earth is rilani. oh well..post another collab like this, it was so cool!!!

[jho]

I really enjoyed this =)
I listened to it like 3 times in a row haha~
Great work guys <3!!

[kokoling]

Wow, huge collaboration. *_________* Crazy shizzle. I enjoyed it a lot. Couldn't hear Onigiri and Rilani that well, but they're bg vocal, so it's all right I suppose. Mixing needs a bit of work. It's not full enough. It sounds almost distant.

Kudos to Acidhead, she kicked butt! Jacky, good job too. A few areas need fixing, but overall well done. I like how you tried something different.

[luvjunjin0819]

pure awesomeness to you all!!!

[geneyoonit]

wooa drama on soompi performers ...

i honestly thought it was very good...

but please stop the drama.. LOL

[NAN]

This is by far one of the best group collaborations on soompi for who knows how long anymore.

I agree that rilani and onigiri weren't loud enough as back up vocals. However, I think this piece was very well performed. I loved the energy, the vocals, the music. Nice.

I thought acidhead lacked a little in energy and emotion. But, her strong vocals overpowered. LOVED the tune of her voice.

Jacky, being the main vocalist, I think you did great.


And again, this is by far one of the best group collaborations. Keep on going!
Great job everybody!

[kpopper]

LOL
that was BOMB!!!!!!!!!!!!

hahaha

good job guys!^^