Update: Former AOA Member Mina Posts Allegations Detailing Years Of Harassment From Jimin
Warning: discussion of suicide and self-harm.
Former AOA member Mina has shared multiple posts on her personal Instagram account, detailing what she says has been her experience as a member of AOA. In her posts, Mina states that one member of the girl group had continuously bullied and tormented her, later going on to name the member as Jimin.
On July 3, Mina took to her personal Instagram account and posted a screenshot of someone sending her a message using profanity and telling her to get lost. Mina’s post reads as follows:
I really, really want to get lost too, but I have to take care of my mom… Oh, I’ll probably be contacted and told I’m brainless again. That’s right. I’m brainless and I never learned anything properly. I had to earn money from a young age because our family was struggling. Around the time of my dad’s passing, I cried once in the waiting room and one of the unnies [older member] told me that I was ruining everyone’s mood and told me not to cry, dragging me to the closet of the waiting room. I told her I was so scared at the thought of my dad dying. I still can’t forget those words. Other bullying incidents? Other profanities? I can deal with them, even though they hurt. Because we rode the same car, I was given a sedative and sleeping pills and put to sleep. I knew I had to do well at scheduled activities but I could feel myself breaking more and more. Because of her, I once tried to attempt suicide.
And I’m okay with not being acknowledged as an idol or an actor. I’m very bad at it, I’m still very lacking. But I’ve been so happy doing it and I worked really hard, it’s a job I really love. I’ve never felt stressed because of work. To be honest, I really didn’t want to leave AOA but because of one person who hated me, I was bullied for 10 years and by the end, I was so angry that I wanted to curse at her just once. In the end, I gave up AOA. I used to enjoy promoting with the other members. Recently, her father passed away. My heart ached and I felt strange because I knew what that feels like. I went to the funeral hall and as soon as she saw me, she cried and apologized. I felt so empty and my heart crumbled. It felt like everything had emptied out, all of my resentment disappeared and everything felt okay. But because I was so broken, I was scared of being on hiatus. Of course, I’d anticipated it and thought I’d be okay if I learned new things and got treated for depression, panic disorder, or anxiety. But so many things happened during that hiatus. To be honest, I was worn out. Netizens? Just like what the people on the internet were saying, I didn’t know who I was anymore, I didn’t want to see myself anymore, and I thought of myself as annoyingly loud. But I wasn’t born because I wanted to be born. I also have a mouth, I also have hands, I couldn’t control myself anymore, but I had to keep living for my mom. I don’t need people to like me or be interested in me, can’t people just leave me alone? Because it’s all my fault.
Her second post read as follows:
Oh, the reason I brought up that person in AOA is because my dad was diagnosed with late-stage pancreatic cancer and I knew he would pass away soon, but because I thought she would tell me off again, I had an acting job, we were making a comeback so I didn’t want to negatively affect the other members as we were promoting, I had lines to learn and had to smile a lot, I felt like I couldn’t get caught up in thoughts of my dad and I needed to do my job properly, so I couldn’t visit my dad at the hospital. Because of his cancer, he was skin and bones, and I couldn’t help but cry when I saw him. My sister would call and say that my dad couldn’t speak anymore but was still asking for me. But what if I start crying during a scheduled activity? What if she says something to me again? I was so young and I thought that was what I needed to do. I thought that was the right thing to do and I didn’t want to get told off anymore. So I could have seen my dad more but I didn’t. And when my father closed his eyes, I saw it and I heard the sound of the machine as his pulse flatlined. I was told that my dad had shakily written “Where is my daughter?” on a sketchbook and shown the nurse, but I hadn’t been able to go see him because I was working. From what I heard, she’d been given a VIP room and her solo activities were canceled, but I hope that wasn’t the case. You should be professional, too. Don’t cry, okay? You said it ruined the mood, you asked why you had to walk on eggshells because of me. You need to overcome it well, too. I still can’t erase the memory of what you said to me and how you acted. Even though the memories are fainter, I remember them all. Whenever I remember them, I take medication and get through it. But I think what happened with my dad will stay with me for life. Those might have been words you spit out without much thought for me, but those words were so hurtful to me. In our last five minutes together, I told you about how that had been hurtful, and you glared at me and said, “I don’t think I’m that much of a bad person that I would say something like that?” Another member so courageously spoke up and said those were words you did say. I was so dispirited that I couldn’t speak and I thought to myself, ‘Is she even human?’ And we said our goodbyes. To be honest, I’m not that smart so I have really bad memory but with you, the list is endless, there’s so much there. But I’ll only say that one thing because who knows, I terminated my contract with the agency but what if they ask me to pay for breach of contract? I haven’t said everything, so it’s okay, right? Because of you, I take numerous pills and because I cut my left wrist so much, the nerves are damaged so it stings and aches. But when I look at my mom, I feel the will to live, I need to go make money. So I’m working hard to undergo scar treatment, although I still have nightmares. What’s funny is that before I left, we [AOA members] would have drinks together without you and talk, but still, none of us can figure it out? Why do you hate me?
During this time, Jimin took to her Instagram story and shared a black screen with the word “Fiction” on it, which she soon deleted.
After this occurred, Mina shared another post that reads as follows:
I’ve only said one of out one trillion things that exist. Try saying it’s fiction, you’ll be punished by the heavens. Don’t be like that. There are witnesses and evidence. I’m sorry but there’s no need to hear from both sides because I did nothing wrong. During our last days together, I wanted to get hair implants but I was late to get to the dance practice room because the anesthesia wasn’t wearing off. I called in advance but as soon as I heard your voice, I knew you would throw things into chaos so I couldn’t go to the dance practice room. And that day, I tried to commit suicide again. That’s my biggest fault [to you]. I’ve said everything I’ve done wrong, so should I share stories about you now? There’s so many that it would be bothersome to write them all down. But to say this is fiction, if you had a conscience.. Why did you delete it? Try calling it fiction, there will be quite a lot of people who would be dumbfounded to hear that. Oh right, even back then, you said you couldn’t remember and you said you weren’t a bad person who would say things like that, right? Wow, it must be nice to be able to erase your memory like that. They say the person who says hurtful words usually can’t remember them. Please erase my memory too. Please, please. Then again, you probably could see my wrist and not feel any guilt, right? You’d probably curse right at my face.
Mina made another post that includes an image of a scarred wrist, and she called out Jimin by name for the first time. Her post reads as follows:
Fiction? This is too scary to even be called fiction. I underwent three to four rounds of scar treatment and it’s become fainter. But I’m going crazy every day because your memory won’t disappear, Jimin. Laws? Lawsuits? I don’t have the money to do that. Psychological damages? I don’t need any of it. I have no plans to do that, I’m just so, so sad that I’m so broken because of you, and it hurts and I’m tired. What I want is for you to come to me and admit to your faults and sincerely apologize to me. I think that’s all I need. The person who tormented me seems to be totally fine. When waking up every morning is so painful for me. But I need to provide for my family. So admit to your faults and apologize, so I can let go of what’s built up in my heart, okay?
Following these posts, a source from Mina’s agency Woori Actors stated, “Mina is currently with acquaintances and friends, and she is regaining her emotional stability.” It was said that agency staff were also regularly contacting her out of concern and the source stated, “We will do our best to ensure her well-being.”
Later on, Mina returned to her Instagram account to post the following message:
You must be finding it difficult to just come and apologize to me. Every time we got a new manager, you’d say that I was scary and just pretending to be stupid. Why did you say I was scary and pretending to be stupid? You’d say I was acting stuck up just because I went to auditions and when I worked hard to diet so my face would look nicer, you’d say, “Mina, what’s wrong with your body? I hate seeing it. Gain some weight.” When we were trainees, you’d hit me and say it was because I was at the front. We’d have to say, “Did you have a good night’s rest?” “Yes, I’m sorry,” and “Thank you” in a formal tone to you. Everything had to go your way, you could bring anyone you wanted to the dorms. It was so noisy that I went to the practice room to sleep. You’d say things like, “Hey, hasn’t so-and-so changed these days?” and go around targeting different members. Oh right, remember when I didn’t greet you first at the hair and makeup shop and I got an earful, or don’t you? That’s only the light stuff. There are so many things that were so much worse over 10 years. But thanks to you, I have nothing to lose and I’m not afraid of anything? Because my source of fear was you, your existence caused me stress. You couldn’t have seen that from my previous posts till now, right? It just became a part of my life and now, I’ve forgotten it all and all I’m left with is mental illness. Along with some harsh words. Every time I wrote a will, I would include your name. I thought maybe when you read it one day, you’d feel guilty. I’d have stress-induced convulsions and collapse, I’d attempt to commit suicide and collapse, my mom would cry, and my sister is battling cancer, but they’d have to keep going to the emergency room because of me. I’ve never talked back to you, and have I ever done anything wrong from when we were trainees to when we debuted and promoted? If I did, tell me. Did you not like me because I wasn’t good at flattery? But I still did my best. Whether I was told off or not, I would smile and keep approaching you, putting aside my pride. I was amazed to hear that you were taking prescribed medication for your mental health and were having a hard time. You said everything you wanted to say and did almost everything you wanted to do, you were so selfish. I was so envious of you. Of course, everyone has struggles but at least you were able to freely express that? I always had to push it down. I’m not in the right state of mind right now. But the person who made me like this is you. The person who made my family suffer is you. I used to be strong mentally. When I was a trainee, I’d say it was because you’re the leader and told myself to pity you. But it’s still the same after all these years. I couldn’t tell anyone that I was suffering because of you. Things finally exploded when it came time to renew contracts and that’s when my family found out. Did my family ever say something to you? Even when their daughter was attempted to commit suicide because of someone, they never got angry. You were able to cry when you wanted to and you received so much comfort. I was worried you’d tell me off again so for 10 years.. How did I spend that time? By the end, I had almost 200 sleeping pills because of you. I collapsed and I have no memory of that. I wrote your name on an A4 piece of paper and told my mom that I was sorry, and that’s how I still live every day. I’m broken as much as I can be broken. Because of me, my mom is also suffering from depression, did you know? You are the one person who makes me not want to live, I’m serious, you’re the only reason. Even if you came and sincerely apologized to me, I’m already broken so I collapse, I suddenly start crying, I take out a knife, I write ‘Shin Ji Min’ down on a piece of paper. I’m so broken and I’m so full of anger that my heart aches and I feel like I’m going crazy. I’m sorry to my mom, dad, and sister. Can’t you at least tell me why you hate me? With everything you did to me, you can’t say that you didn’t hate me. I’m so upset. I feel upset whenever I open my eyes. I feel like I’m going crazy. It’s so difficult. When you were sitting in the front passenger seat and turn back to us, my heart would start racing because I thought you’d say something to me. I want an apology from you. What will that do? I don’t know. But I feel like I need to something because I’m so angry. There’s no reason for why you tormented me, is there? Shin Ji Min, huh? I wish you could feel what I feel for just one day, I wish I could go back in time and change one day with you. You’ve had a comfortable life. Say something. Let’s hear it. What did you hate about me that much? Huh? I really hate you too. If it wasn’t for you, what would I be like now? At least I probably wouldn’t be crying every day, having nightmares every day, and trying to attempt suicide, right? Because I did nothing to do, I honestly want to go around talking about you and telling people that I have a mental illness because of you. That’s why I’m like this now, sad, isn’t it? It’s finally boiling over after being pent up. I can’t hold it in anymore, I can’t hide it anymore.
She continued to write:
I heard you took medication and fell asleep, must be nice. I’m dunking my head in my sink and trying to not cry. I can eat more than ten sleeping pills and not fall asleep, amazing, isn’t it? I’ll stay up for days so I can sleep. Even if I slit my wrists and the floor of our house is covered in blood, I zone out. I blankly think about when I’m going to die, and some people have come running to save me, right? Why does there have to be so many people who are suffering because of me? Are you sleeping well? As soon as I heard that, I got angry again, teared up, and filled with rage. I’m strange, so strange. Try living a life where you have to dunk your head in the sink all the time. It sucks. You are such a bad person. You have to know that. I want to sleep too. I want to get a proper night’s sleep too. Why does everyone around me have to suffer because of you? Why did you make me such a bad person? I want to stop worrying people. But I’m so angry, I’m so upset, I feel like I’m going crazy. Stop sleeping and apologize. Wake up, let me stop feeling broken anymore. Wow, I’m so angry.
Her next post reads:
My dream probably won’t come true, right? But if you’re a human being, you shouldn’t act like that. And FNC Entertainment, I told them everything at the end. I was half out of my mind, I couldn’t even open my eyes properly, and I stuttered. I hadn’t fully recovered from taking hundreds of sleeping pills but I told them it was because of Jimin and they wouldn’t listen to me. Who should I talk to? I shouldn’t get angry? I’m like this every day. I’ve been living like this every day and you just didn’t know because I didn’t talk about it. From when I was 21 years old [Korean age reckoning], I’ve been hiding my medicine bottles and secretly taking medication so I could hold on. I’ve lived like this. Shin Ji Min, because of you. Because of that person who is sleeping so well right now.
Mina shared another message as she said:
To all those who are suffering because of someone.. Fight. Don’t hold it in. Or grab someone and tell them. Sleeping pills? Don’t take them. It will never end. Don’t live like me. Don’t hold it in. Do everything you want to do and express yourself. Please live like that.
Neither Jimin nor FNC Entertainment have released a statement regarding Mina’s allegations as of now.
Updated July 4 KST:
In what she says is her final post about the matter, Mina revealed that the AOA members — including Jimin — came to her home, after which she talked to Jimin about everything that she felt over the years.
Here is the full post:
First, I’m sorry for being unable to control my emotions, making a lot of noise all day, and affecting a lot of people.. There must have been a lot of articles that were hard to read, and I’m sure for some, it’s something that they didn’t want to know. A lot of people came by my house, and I’m sorry for causing concern. There were many actions and words that a celebrity shouldn’t have taken or said..
I’m just really sorry. A few hours ago, all of the [AOA] members and managers came to my house, and we talked. At first, Jimin came in angry, and I was in disbelief. I asked if hers was an expression of someone who’s here to apologize. After arguing, she asked where the knives were, and if it would be enough if she died. Eventually, we sat down and talked, and she said she didn’t remember what happened. I continued to talk about all the times I was hurt by her. Of course, I wasn’t in my right mind either, and she didn’t recall much. I talked about when this happened and when that happened, and I couldn’t remember everything either, but what I did remember, I looked her straight in the eyes and told her.
In her mind, we resolved everything at the funeral. But it was a funeral, and at least for that day, I was there to comfort her. But that day, we contacted each other, and she, not remembering anything, said sorry, so from her point of view, I see how she might’ve thought that way.
But how can you resolve 11 years of pain in a single day? The [day of the funeral], we didn’t discuss anything about what I suffered over the years, and how can you talk about those things at a funeral? Of course, on that day, I was sincerely there to support her, and after that, I was back to myself. When you’re broken, you don’t return to your whole self overnight.
Anyway, I continued to talk to her, and after listening, [Jimin] said she was sorry. No matter how it turned out, I did receive an apology, and I decided to accept it. [Jimin] left, and with the remaining members, I promised to pull myself together and stop thinking of taking any extreme measures, and that was it.
I believe that our two fathers are watching us from heaven. Since I can’t lie.. To be honest, at first, when I first saw Jimin, I wondered if she actually felt any sort of guilt. But regardless, she said sorry many times.. I heard it.. I did.. Honestly, I don’t really know what to write. I truthfully didn’t see any intention from her to sincerely apologize, but this could be because of my own sense of inferiority, or it could be that I just want to see it that way since I’m so mad at her..
To her, it could have been sincere, so it’s hard to say for certain what it was. But since I need to wrap up.. Moving forward, I’m going to regain my composure and work hard and continue to receive treatment. I won’t be making any more of a fuss about this. I’m really sorry.. I’m sorry.. I’m going to try to get better little by little. There are a lot of people who were affected by me today, and I’m really sorry……. Even in this post, I don’t think I was able to write anything positive about [Jimin]. I acknowledge that. Honestly, I haven’t even been thinking about her apology at the end. The image of her coming over angry is what’s continually playing in my head. I’m as broken as can be, so it’s not going to be an immediate recovery…….. but I’m going to try. It’s also what I agreed to do..
I’m not going to mention this or post about this again.. It’s not good writing, so I’m not even sure what it says, but anyway, I’m sorry again..
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Editor’s Note: The embedded Instagram post containing graphic imagery has been removed and is now shared as a link.